Tear open my heart;
throw it away for another's take.
Leave me alone with tear filled eyes,
and give me your broken hearted blade.
It was all handed to you,
on a silver platted platter.
I gave you all you asked,
but as you said yourself,
it was nothing.
2006-07-07 07:55:59 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Other - Arts & Humanities
not really finished, but comment please??
2006-07-07 07:56:17 · update #1
soo... im still messin around w/ it, but ive def added alot more...im about to add what i have now to a new question.
2006-07-07 10:16:30 · update #2
ok, so, i added what i have now. so you should go take a look and comment.
2006-07-07 10:27:30 · update #3
and winstonsmithratm:
that was a misspelled alliteration.
2006-07-07 10:28:12 · update #4
That was positively awful. I haven't heard anything so melodramatic and vapid since that Taking Back Sunday concert I was forced to attend. Poetry is meant to contain concrete images, not ramble on about such a tiresome concept without getting any real idea across.
2006-07-07 07:59:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow this is so awesome.Please finish it because I really want to know the end
2006-07-07 14:57:47 · answer #2 · answered by Eternity 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very nice but you should change up the ending just a little make it rhyme. but besides that it sounds thoughtfully expressive
2006-07-07 15:36:45 · answer #3 · answered by lovelaungauge 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not bad so yeah have a finish or a end to it would love to read it in full
2006-07-07 14:59:46 · answer #4 · answered by Asoka 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, you keep on going.. What you have sofar is pretty good.
When you get it complete,send me a copy.. dvz_33@yahoo.com
2006-07-07 15:03:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be totally honest with you, you should take up bowling to occupy your time.
sorry you are so bummed out. good luck.
2006-07-07 18:26:55 · answer #6 · answered by -* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think "platted" has to go, i dont even think thats a word.
2006-07-07 15:03:02 · answer #7 · answered by winstonsmithratm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
typical love song.
2006-07-07 14:57:52 · answer #8 · answered by chocolate_cat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love it it sounds great.
2006-07-07 14:57:32 · answer #9 · answered by Haley f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
awful
2006-07-07 15:00:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋