I've been on my own ever seens i was 17....I've been renting...now I finally own my first HOME....problem: my family (sisters, brother, mother, etc..) think they can do what ever they want....I have rules in my house and they dont seem to understand that.....so i got tuff with them....Respect my house or dont come at all....what do you guys or girls think....is there a different way i should got about this or stik with the big guns....?
2006-07-07 06:56:04 · 5 answers · asked by TUCK 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Im 28 now and I enjoy my family and friends at home, I have a son....I'm tring to set rules for my son and the family need to follow them also....
2006-07-07 07:27:34 · update #1
This is YOUR OWN HOME. You should be able to set the rules. I'm really proud of you for setting up boundaries. That's actually really healthy. Keep it up. You deserve the respect.
2006-07-07 07:03:25 · answer #1 · answered by MornGloryHM 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should definately stick to your guns and let them know you demand respect in your own home. I would also remind them that you will give them the same respect in theirs. You are obviously a strong willed person to have found success after being responsible for yourself when you were but a child...I'm sure your family is very proud of your accomplishments, and will realize that you have reasons for your rules.
2006-07-07 07:07:12 · answer #2 · answered by tella stella 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard to enforce, but yes -- etiquette and just simple consideration for someone (family or not) suggests that you follow the host's rules when you are a guest.
In this case, your family should listen to you.
My parents used to just barge right into our house when they came to visit, as if they lived there. I felt a little disrespected; and my wife was VERY annoyed. Any time someone enters another person's house, it is entering their private sanctum, and one should not be intrusive.
We ended up just making sure our door was locked, so they'd have to knock first.
So I think the key here is that, yes, you are totally within your rights to ask for certain behavior in your home... just as you would obey your parents or relatives if visiting them. If you need to restate that for them (that you respect their homes when you visit, so they need to respect yours), then do so and don't feel bad about it.
However, as host, if you can find a way to care for your guests that meets their needs. For example, if they want to smoke, instead of forbidding it altogether, you can have them go outside or into the garage to do it.
A gracious host will take care of his guests and try to find a compromise, if possible. Sometimes people will be more inclined to listen and respect you if they believe that you are considering their needs.
2006-07-07 07:07:03 · answer #3 · answered by Jennywocky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your home, your rules. I would just explain to them that you finally have a nice place to live and you have worked hard to get where you are and you don't want it ruined because of their disrespect for your rules. Tell them You enjoy having their company, but they need to understand that smoking in your house (or whatever they are doing) is unacceptable.
2006-07-07 07:16:29 · answer #4 · answered by Fiona70 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stick wit the big guns honey, you worked hard for what you earned, and dont let NOBODY! mess it up rather it be friends or family.
2006-07-07 06:59:53 · answer #5 · answered by kittykat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋