Why can't the '' big girl '' in the group be the cute one.?

Question

I am wondering why overweight are always associated with being sloppy and nasty. I am about 4''11 240 pounds and I think I look and dress nice. Why is there such a difference in the attitudes of people towards a size 8 and 18.

Answer 1

Well i think the "big girl" IS the cute on in the group. I am overweight and am not nasty or sloppy either. Most of the people think we are cuz that is all they see are super skinny models in magizines and on tv, in my opinon i think they are the ones that are gross. Mo'nique is my role model and i love the idea of her her show 'Mo'nique's fat chance', look at all those women on there i think they are much more better looking than some of the thinner models. She encourages women everywhere to accept and embrace their curves, and teaches plus-sized glamour girls to love and feel good about themselves (and their bodies) as they are.

Answer 2

Because our society doesn't find fat appealing or attractive. Tastes are cultural. There are some tribal societies that find fat very attractive but the western world does not.

What's more fat is very unhealthy and with a rising emphasis on how unhealthy it is, you are not likely to find our society moving towards "fat love" anytime soon.

Quite frankly seriously overweight (and yeah this includes you..you are 2 1/2 times what you should weigh) cost our society billions of dollars each year in the form of higher insurance and medical costs, and more sick days from obese employees. This means that your lack of effort to control your weight costs ME money.

Fat people complain if the airlines want to charge them for 2 seats, but I can tell you that I've been the regular sized person inbetween 2 big girls and your size creates a problem for me because I don't get full use of the seat I paid for! (yeah..they get the armrests and often try to not put the armrest down because they don't fit, but if they don't fit in their own seat then they are partially in MINE.)

That's a side of it few obese people consider but as costs continue to skyrocket, don't be surprised if more people begin to really hate fat.

Now I don't pick my friends by their size, and I agree with you that it is possible for a heavy gal to look her best, and certainly be very clean. I don't think all fat people are lazy or sloppy. In fact I do know that is just not true.

However, I don't date fat people. It is not sexually appealing to me. A guy can be sweet as can be but I can't look past the gut. It's not just shallowness either. I'm a small person and I don't want the sexual limitation of having a heavy partner. I also don't want a sick old man who is prematurely old because he couldn't control his lifestyle. My kids and I eat healthy and are very physically active. Someone more than just a little overweight is not going to fit in with our lifestyle.

However, even with a genetic predisposition, you are fat because you eat too much, eat the wrong things and don't exercise enough. Period. That is a choice you made. When you make a choice you live with the consequences. The problem with people choosing to be fat is that the rest of society is also paying for YOUR choice.

So you should love yourself no matter what, but stop blaming others for finding your body size and lifestyle unappealing. You may well be otherwise a wonderful person, but that is NOT enough for most people seeking a mate.

Answer 3

well, i'm not really an expert on this one, but i rarely find fat girls repulsive. there are, however, two types of 'fat girl'. the one who is genetically fat, and the one who is like that because she doesn't take care of herself. the confidence that i'm feeling from ur message tells me ur more of the first type, and that's great. the problem is the second type, since even the slightest amount of noticable 'lazy fat' gives off a very negative impression, especially for strangers. the annoying fact is that few guys take the time to differentiate both kinds, and tend to view them the same way - the bad way.


on a personal note, being a guy myself, i've noticed one thing common among most guys. beauty attracts a guy, but personality keeps a guy attracted. and guys have very varied opinions about beauty. the only thing i can tell you is that i like ur confidence, and no matter who thinks what about your body weight, few people are actually gonna have the balls to tell you about it, and those few will learn soon enough.

P.S: on a side note, i'm not sure how much 240 pounds translates to in KGs, but i think it's a bit overweight for a person under 5 feet. i'm not telling you to lose the weight, but please regularly check up with your doctor to make sure your healthy.

Answer 4

Because people are ignorant - including my husband. People judge others by a lot of things. We are not here to judge, and I've been overweight and still looked good. I hate how people act about this kind of stuff. You are so right. The "big person" can still be cute no matter what. As long as anyone keeps themselves clean, dresses nicely, and takes care of themselves, it shouldn't be like that. Good for you!

Answer 5

Well not to be rude but come on. People like people who take care of themselves, now im not saying you dont. But the majority of men and women who are over weight go home at night after eating fast food for breakfast and lunch sit down put TV on and eat before bed. Its image, this goes for girls to who wants to be with a guy who is overweight and doesnt care about himself. Most of those people have self-esteem issues and other problems and everyone knows it. Dont take this to heart I dont know you. You had a question and I am giving you an honest answer.

Answer 6

u can b trust me iam a big girl but i dressed cute and not try 2 b cocky but i catch some boys attention in a good way. i really dont care what ppl say about me. dont let that get 2 u. u r beautiful in ur own way. yeah iam tha big girl in tha group that is cute. plus is in!!!!!!!!and BIG IS BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!! as i said dont let those ppl who look down on u get 2 u. but it is all good though. if u dress nice and take care of yo self then u have nothin 2 worry about. God made u tha way he wanted u 2 b and who ever said that overweight ppl r nasty and sloppy we r NOT!!!!! always remember ppl r goin 2 talk about u no matter what but everybody get talked about somebody. so dont worry hon. good luck!!

Answer 7

The media is to blame I think for all the discrimination for overweight people. I have a weight problem myself so I know what you mean. TV and movies show slim bodies, many too slim. Models and actresses have to work hard to keep their body in shape, and lots of them starve themselves to do it. It is just as unhealthy to be too skinny as to be too fat. I think if you are happy like you are, then that is what is important.

Answer 8

i kinda know how u feel I'm 5"4 and am 165 but first things first shoxypickles. I hope u have a baby and end up 500pounds u f***ing twig.... Don't worry about what every1 thinks just be yourself if know likes u than u don't need their assies anyway..

Answer 9

Hey big, beautiful sista! It's because just like my girl Mo'Nique always stated "Skinny Bitches Are Evil"(just wanted to make you smile, m'dear!) True beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, and colors. I'm 5'11" and 195, and I have just as much confidence like those "death-shot-murder" girls in the mags and other glad rags. Remember, wear clothes to compliment your figure. Just like us big girls can't wear everything, neither can those skinny girls. Be beautiful and bold, dearie. And remember that phrase...WATCH OUT FOR THE BIG GIRLS! We're here and we ain't goin' nowhere but up!

Answer 10

Who said the "big girl" can't be the "cute one"? You CAN be big and cute.


This wouldn't matter to women if they really understood that if the guy doesn't like you because you are "big" he is NOT the one for you! So who cares what he thinks all that matters is that you accept yourself as God has made you and that you take proper care of your body as he instructs.