Both women are beautiful but his loyalty lies with the wife because she has been with him through the worst fo times, but he dreams of making love to this other girl. He told me he wished he lived in a country where it would be okay to have 2 wifes. He is ill but still wishes to see the other girl before he is unable too.
2006-07-07 05:22:09 · 10 answers · asked by kentbasner 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Heheh, My ex-boyfriend of 15 years still dreams about me and always tells me that I was the love of his life and that he fantasizes of me and often wonders how would our life be together as a married couple. He still has my picture after all of this years and dreams about me.
He is married, I'm single. He said that he shouldnt had let me go, that he regrets it, that if he could turn back time he would have marry me, he keeps on by saying that some day he will marry me even if he is old and gray and bla bla bla etc. He even named one of his girls after me, the other girl was named after my sister. He keeps in touch with my parents and tells them that he should be their son-in-law and how much he wishes to be part of our family.
I find it funny and also pathetic. I entretain it because it gives me an ego boost although I have no intentions on having anything with him, ever! I love to see the poor man torturing himself for years after dumping me (gosh 15 years ago for Pete's sake!) and marrying the wrong person. Revenge is so sweet!
2006-07-07 05:29:58 · answer #1 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't marry her. I was a wed-lock baby and I know from first hand experience if the parents can't cooperate with each other it makes it harder for the child. If there is no attraction than why did you sleep with her in the first place would be my first thought. Be there for the child but make it very clear that right NOW is not a good time. You can't control the future and maybe that spark will come for her. When the baby is born a lot of things will change, but don't make a decision unless you are certain it is the right thing to do. She is only five weeks as well. Most woman miscarry in the first trimester. I would wait to decide till the child is at least one or two. I think she was just trying to get you to marry her because she said she was on birth control yet she still got pregnant? Someone was lying. Take a step back, support her pregnancy, but I wouldn't marry her right away until you KNOW you love her and can be the husband she needs.
2016-03-27 08:01:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm really kind of shocked by the insensitivity of your responses, some of you. People cannot control how they feel. Only how they conduct themselves. This is a very good and decent man who loves his wife but also loves a woman from his past. He did not express a desire to cheat on his wife. He just told his friend he wished he could have both. I understand. I think in a slightly different scenario, I am the woman from his past who he says point blank, to me and to his wife, he still loves. He is honest, and I have always admired that in him. And he is very decent and faithful. His wife tried very hard to accept the current platonic friendship, but she could not, and he then cut ties with me. I beieve that is a wife's preroggative if it is a strong marriage and they want it to stay strong. Occasionally in a marriage one needs to take a hard line to protect the intimacy of that relationship. I am torn apart because I know he loves me, and I love him. However, I would never do anything to hurt him and if his wife is uncomfortable, then that hurts her AND him, and I understand I need to leave. Which I did. I even moved to another city hours away. I am not married and I think my presence was hurting both of them. I feel horrible about that because there was absolutely NOTHING wrong in my actions. But the emotions were there, oh his part and mine, expressed once years ago and now never mentioned again because of his marriage. He told me years ago that he will always love me, because love doesn't die. But he is a scrupulously honest and faithful hu
2015-01-31 09:35:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a typical case/topic for this forum!
I do not quite understand why people still hold onto the past and at the same time confess 'I do' till death do us part? False expectations about marriage, in denial or regret?
As for your question ask your friend to convert to Islam where he could have poligamy! However in reality, ex is just a distraction/lead him on because your friend's ex are not ready to let him go and let him settle down. In addtion, your friend could not move on and let his feeling go in order concerntrate of his wife/marriage!
Ask him to get real and be a man! Dont be fickle and if he could, ask him to cut and ask his ex to buzz off and stop messing his life and lean him on!
As his friends, be fair for his wife and it is for his own good too! The ex always pretend to care, act, ready to listen because she wants your friend to come back and marry them! The ex is nothing but in most cases a 'homewrecker'!
If he likes to play with fire and could afford a messy divorce if the wife could not take it anymore in the future...ask him to continue.
2006-07-07 05:49:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sucks. But how would the husband feel if his wife felt this way about another man? Would he want her feeling this way and wanting to make love to another man? Most likely not. He needs to let this woman go and concentrate more on his wife than this other females. There will always be someone who gets our attention and who we want to be with at least once but we can't. Its just temptation and you gain strength in saying no. He is married and thats final, he shouldn't have gotten married if he wanted to be with someone else. In the bible it is not OK to have two wives, no matter where you live.
2006-07-07 05:33:02 · answer #5 · answered by sweetsugakb24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
his loyalty doesn't lie with his wife because he's wanting to cheat ---he's married but he doesn't sound happily married if he's dreaming and scheming of how to be with another woman! Sounds like you are the other woman?
2006-07-07 05:33:10 · answer #6 · answered by jaimestar64cross 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am glad he feels loyal to his wife. But if you lust after another, purely carnally, that's natural human instinct. But having feelings for this other woman, even in his heart, is adultery. Honestly. If my husband was holding a flame from a past love, I'd feel just as betrayed as if he had cheated with her.
2006-07-07 05:31:07 · answer #7 · answered by outlandsishlady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey leave him alone ..He is a married man and all you want to do is ruin his life because you can`t stand to see him being loyal to his wife and just back off homewrecker...
2006-07-07 05:36:52 · answer #8 · answered by tshee70 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your friend he's dreaming for sure....all he'll do is mess up his life. AND...honey, since you ARE the other girl, leave the married man alone, will ya???? He's just pulling your chain.
2006-07-07 05:28:28 · answer #9 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I WAS IN THE SAME SITUATION AN EX GOT MARRIED THEN STARTED LOOKING FOR ME ,HE GOT IN CONTACT WITH ME...HE STARTED WITH THE WAR STORIES ABOUT HIS UNHAPPINESS AND R SELFISHNESS... MY ADVICE TO HIM WAS IF IT IS THAT BAD LEAVE HER... DEFINITELY NOT FOR ME...IT SOUNDS GOOD THINKING THAT THIS MAN IS STILL FEELING THIS WAY ABOUT YOU... BUT SOCIETY CALLS WOMEN HOMEWRECKERS...HOW WOULD SINGLE WOMEN KNOW MARRIED MEN ARE UNHAPPY?... THEY SEEK US...THE BLAME SHOULD BE WITH THE MAN ... HE MARRIED...AND LOOKING.. THE WOMEN ARE WRONG FOR ALLOWING TO THERE WITH A MARRIED MAN...SOMETIMES THE MEN DO NOT TELL UNTIL YOUR FEELINGS ARE INVOLVED...BY THEN IT IS A EMTIONAL MESS
2006-07-07 06:14:05 · answer #10 · answered by mspussycat6305 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋