Sex.. no sex?

Question

My husband is constantly complaining about the little amount of sex we have.. about 4 times a month. We have 2 little kids (one who never sleeps), and I am a stay at home mom with Non-Traditional homemaker roles. (fix stuff, mow the lawn, blah blah) So, after 2 or 3 fights, I decided that I was just going to make myself have sex even if I was too tired to walk to bed. After 2 weeks of sex 4 times a week, he starts complaining that " I can go too far with this crap" WHAT THE HELL

It's not that it's boring or anything. We know what we like, and we make it good. I did the lingere thing cause he complained about all the lingere that he buys that I never wear, and the bj's that he never gets.. and still.. complains.

Answer 1

some things need to be delt with not as a matter of a mans needs or a womans needs, but as a couples needs.
There is a young child in your house who never sleeps, so it is understandable that you would be too tired to have sex. You need to sit down with your husband and discuss this issue. If you are so tired from having a child who doesn't sleep, then it sounds like you are doing all the work with the kid. Make a trade off. Tell your husband you would be willing to have more sex if he is willing to wak eup at late hours to take care of the children. Explain to him that he needs to pull his weight around the house if he wants you to pull his in bed.
Also, if you don't feel in the mood for sex, don't do it. There is nohing worse than having sex you feel pressured into having. Discuss these issues with your husband,
i wish you well

Answer 2

listen to this from a mans point of view

We (1) just wanta know that can have it if we want it
(2) usually we know in the back of our mind that can't handle it everynite.
(3) We know you can look up longer than we can look down
(4) We like to tell our Buddy's at work we get it when we want it
(5) When we talk about how often we do it we're usually lying

Solution

Go to bed with a smile on your face and just say I'm taking a shower wanta join me? He'll say no I'm too tired to nite. After you shower go to bed with nothing on make sure that you keep your nite gown by the bed just in case the children wake up in the middle of the nite. after a week or so, he'll stop complaining about not getting it enough, don't be rude just be understanding to the fact that we are men we have to try and be controling at all times, lol.
Me
I had problems with my ex- I wanted all the time she never wanted it. and Finlay when I got it I felt like any other guy(all smiles) I had done what I was supposed to do as a man. In the end I found out it wasn't the sex it was the cuddling after the sex that made me fell good. After all you(women) are the life line of the world we need you we don't like to admitt it but we done lol

Yours truly
Randallp4

Answer 3

Ok you need some you time to chill out... so you can at least meet him half way and compromise sex I have learned is a big deal in a relationship it can bring you closer and make or break a relationship I am a mom too and I know how tired out you feel but if you don't make time for your partner too you will be in a worse position . is there mabey more too you not wanting to have sex ?? such as not feeling attractive or not being attracted to him ?? as moms we play such a big role in our kids lives that we forget we are women too and we were with our partners before the kids through counseling I have learned that you must put you and your spouse first because you are the foundation in your relationship without that you will be a single parent or have a relationship that is not a good one for the kids good luck

Answer 4

It is true I actually have the same problem. Believe me he is not just messing with you and playing game. I don't understand it my self, not enough and the too much. I have learned to be able to hug and hold my wife and be satisfied with that, not all the time but some, we also have sex maybe 3-4 times a week, maybe not every week but most. It seems to be a good mixture for me and it works out good. It does happen though, not enough and then too much just like beer. Don't do it if you have to make yourself do it, for me, that would be no fun if my wife was not into it. Good luck.

Answer 5

I notice this in my relationship on both parts. When my husband wants it more I am not as interested. When I want it more my husband is less interested. I think it is the natural order of things (checks and balances) to keep the world in balance.
However, did he used to be the one to initiate it or did you? Who is initiating it now? If he used to and now you are he may just be missing the dominant role. My suggestion is initiate it when you WANT it and let him initiate it when HE wants it. If either of you are not feeling up to it you can suggest snuggling instead - I only ever did this once because once I get started the tiredness and stresses slip away. Sex can reduce stress and the a quicky can create more energy in a woman.

Answer 6

Go back to 4 times a month at least he will be wanting affection, instead of 4 times a week and looking for ways to avoid having sex...once I finally found a partner who wanted sex as much as I do, it wasn't much of a challenge anymore...cut back..more quality than quantity...good luck.

Answer 7

So why not sex 2 times a week? Take the average which is what I suggested.

Answer 8

im sorry, but if i only had sex 4 times a month i would die, you should try and make time. men have needs too! ther is ALWAYS time where you can slip away from the kids for a moment to where you two can be intimate. but if he is being a jerk about it, thats his fault.

Answer 9

He is one of those "NEVER HAPPY" types that can b***h and complain about anything and everything. Slap once in the nuts and make him change his tune.

Answer 10

Its not just doing it... But how u do it...
Try out doing it in interesting and creative ways ... he'll like it

and then it wont mater how often u do it ...