How to convince her to stop seeing a married man?

Question

A single friend has been seeing a married man for a couple of years now. She is successful professionally, very attractive, fun, dynamic and with a strong personality. She says that she will stop the relationship when she meets a single guy that can match the attributes of the married guy (he is a top businessman, super rich, etc.) I tell her she won't meet anyone until she dumps the married guy, but she won't listen! and then she spends endless weekends alone while the guy is with his wife. which makes her feel miserable, but still she does not leave him ... what else can I tell her?

Answer 1

the only thing that's going to work for her,is for her to learn that it is not very right to be going out with a married man. she has to learn herself,nothing u nor anyone says if going to effect her thiking unless*heaven forbids* something happens

Answer 2

Why do people commit? They know it's a possibility the partner might not always be up for sex so why not just stay single if regular sex is the most important thing to them? I can't speak for those individual women but there are lots of reasons why sex tails off into a relationship (and not just that way round). The first guy made himself sound really dumb. "It got less regular when she got pregnant! After our daughter came, it just dropped off totally." Yeah he really has no common sense or empathy if he doesn't have a clue why sex might decrease during pregnancy and disappear after a baby. But everyday in the baby section on this site I say women say they were having sex again after a month so this is not a normal situation, however considering what people go through with babies it's perfectly understandable. Maybe the sex never came back up again because that woman figured out her husband was ignorant and insensitive and didn't want to do it with him any more. And cheating is just so wrong, creating a whole new set of problems and not fixing anything. I'd leave if I wasn't getting any. It's also possible some of those men are lying about not having sex, to try and excuse their cheating. Women having affairs with married men always seem to think they're in a sexless marriage and don't understand why the wife keeps getting pregnant. Many people cheat even with a good sex life. Harriet

Answer 3

Tell her all that qualities and that she needs to use them for something good. Of course she will not find the attributes of the married guy on other man if she likes him so much. Make her see that a married man is a man she shouldn't have and that there are many single guys better then him out there, just waitting to find her. You gotta understand that is something very difficult to her, specially if they are seeing each other for so long. You gotta let her know that you're just trying to make her do the right thing, but you'll be on her side no mather what. Another thing you should be carefull with is that if she like this guy so much and if you are so insistent, she might get mad at you. Be very carefull with you words. Anyway, it's her life, if she wanna do the wrong thing what can you do? Anyway, good luck.

Answer 4

Well its nice to see that you are concerned about your friend, but I think your working in the wrong area. You should be trying to find a good man for her. One that she can be with every weekend. Since she isn't looking you look for her. Because it sounds like you have given her all the advice necessarry. there is nothing more you can say to her. Now put those energies into finding her a man. A good man. And she will thank you for it later. She does not have the strength to pull away herself. Another man can do it. As long as she isnt attracted to the money and the powerful position there are plenty of candidates out there. Otherwise, dont say much more about it or you will no longer be a friend to her. Just be there when times get tough for her.

Answer 5

That is sad!! I do not know what to say other than what I say to my friends all the time, "If you like it I love it!" If you do not mind sitting at home for weekends on end lonely and miserable because this man is living his real life and not worried about your secret one. Then that is what I love for you to do. She is not waiting to meet a guy she is hoping that the guy that she is with leaves his wife. She knew what she was getting into and she did it anyway so there is nothing that you can do for besides hope that his wife does not find out, or does depending on where you stand.

Answer 6

Tell the wife. I was the girl sitting at home while her hubby went out playing all week and I had no clue. When I found out I was devastated.

I think your friend needs a reality check. And she should be told, what goes around comes around and one day when she grows up and finds her own man for once, he'll do this to her. Then she'll know what it's like.

Sorry if I'm not too sympathetic towards your friend, but frankly it disgusts me when someone thinks it's fine and dandy to screw around with married people, and that goes both ways.

Tell the wife, and tell her quickly. SHE deserves to know and your friend deserves the consequences that will come to her. You must know that, or you wouldn't have written your question.

Answer 7

Your pal has serious problems ahead. Did she grow up with both her parents?! If yes how would she have felt if she found out her father was having an affair or worse still what if she was married and found out her husband is having an affair. Tell her she is wasting away the best years of her life on a man who treats her second best after his wife and family maybe even his business and friends take a slot ahead. Ask her to get her priorities right. If he is cheating on his wife with her what makes her think he is not cheating on her too?. Life is to short.

Answer 8

Ive dated the married guy before and you need to tell her that he is using her but he can only do that if she lets him. The married guy never leaves the wife for the girlfriend and if he did it is a good chance he would find another girlfriend while hes with your friend. Guys that do this keep doing it, period. Shes sounds like a good person that deserves a real relationship.

Answer 9

She is an idiot. She's fishing in someone else's pond and it will come back to bite her in the butt. He isn't going to leave his wife and she is cheating herself out of a real relationship with someone who is available and can commit to her.

This guy has it made. No doubt he's lied about his circumstances and his marital relationship. They all do. He gets to keep his nice little marriage and family intact and he also gets to have some fun on the side with a willing participant who doesn't have enough self respect to know when she's being used.

Your friend and the guy are both losers.

Answer 10

There is always a price to pay for everything.most of the professional Carrier women are having problem in keeping a home,probably because most of them are like wild bird that cant be tamed.that's is no ex cuss to spoil other peoples home, she should have trust in God that she could still find her own man, she just need to wait for the right time, occasion and opportunity.

Answer 11

You dont tell her anything more. Sometimes they need to find out the hard way. If you continue to pry in her life and tell her what to do you could end a good friendship. You dont have to like what she does but you could offer to be there when she is sad. Maybe she will wake up and see that dating a married man isnt the way to go.