We've been married for 12 years and have 2 kids. He works most nights and I work mornings. I think we're "normal", he thinks we don't have sex nearly as often as most other people. Enlighten us please!
2006-07-07 02:06:37 · 18 answers · asked by bougainvillaea 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Do you mean with a spouse, an other person, or an inanimate object (other than a spouse)?
I think it's important for you to have sex as often as possible, especially with people that answer your advice questions. :)
Seriously, apparently this is the most common issue among ppl that have been married for a while. I assume you guys are mid 30's. If your'e under 25 or over 65, ignore everything I say.
Hundreds of articles have been written about this, but essentially they boil down to this:
1. Men are horny and need sex at least 3 times a week. ALL men, if they don't get it at home, and have the opportunity to get it somwhere else, will do that. Even the best of men, may not go looking for outside action, but if the action comes to them, and they are not satisfied at home, they will go for it.
If you don't want him to cheat, he's got to get what he needs.
2. Women are just as horny, but women need love. They can not (in long term relationships) separate sex from love, and the less love they feel (not necessarily the less love they get, just if they feel less loved), the less "in the mood" they are.
3. The horniest part of the body is the brain. Turn-On's/Off's all take place in the brain, and hubby's got to learn to pay as much attention to your brain as you do to his dick.
Men: If you don't make her feel special, there are plenty of men out there who will. And when he come's along, she'll do things for him that you would never even dream of asking for. There will be: one very happy wife; one happiest SOB on the face of the Earth; and one totally totally miserable husband (you).
Get a grip on reality, and you better give her what she needs. No bargaining, no negotiations, no compromises. She will get what she needs one way or another.
Women: Get a grip on reality, and you better give him what he needs. No bargaining, no negotiations, no compromises. He will get what she needs one way or another. You decide if it's from you or someone else.
Hubby: Spend three minutes a day thinking about how to make her feel special, and it will be the best investment of your life. It will come back to you in ways you can't even imagine.
Wifey: Make sure he really understands how important it is to you to feel special. He is a just dumb brute (as you have told your self this many times), and will NEVER figure this out on his own. (Don't ask why? --he just won't. Get over it.) It is up to you to get him to understand this. No one else will ever tell it to him.
Good Luck.
2006-07-07 02:41:08 · answer #1 · answered by profdave99 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Been married for 10 years and I have to beg sex. I am 31 and the husband is 42. So can't really help you out there.................. We used to have sex 4 or 5 times a week. But in the last couple of years that has declined to once a month or longer.
2006-07-07 09:18:40 · answer #2 · answered by Carrie C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As crazy as it sounds... almost every night..... and fun sex too...I would say on an average we don't have sex about 6 times a month...It only takes "time" when you have time... If you don't have a lot of "time".. have fun quick sex... I have been with my man for 3+ years, but I was married for 13 years to another man and until about 2 months before we separated/divorced we had sex 4-5 times a week. (Sex or another women obviously was not the reason for the divorce)
2006-07-07 09:15:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married 8 years and sex is not as often as I would like. 1-2 times per week.
2006-07-07 09:41:38 · answer #4 · answered by jenrzeb 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whats "normal" ? Some folk may regard four times a night as normal, others are happy with four times a year!
There is no fixed average you have to try and keep up with, its not a race!. The important thing is that you are both happy with the amount you have sex.
It sounds like your husband would prefer a little more action, so its up to you to either provide it or sit down with him and talk it over. Remember, it doesnt have to be full, time-consuming sex to be fun.
2006-07-07 09:16:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been with my wife for 9 years and have 2 kids. On average it is once or twice a month, if I am lucky. If the kids are by the grandparents for the weekend that number usually jumps up a digit or two.
2006-07-07 09:24:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
married 20 years...and we're at the 3 to 4 times per week range. you never said how often you do
2006-07-07 09:10:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been married for 8 yrs, have 3 kids. We only have sex 1-2x per week. Not enough for me.
2006-07-07 09:33:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was married for 23yrs we had sex 3-4 times a week. I found out my ex-wife was havin sex with my ex-best friend just as many times. So now it is slightly less.
2006-07-07 09:16:20 · answer #9 · answered by iceman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
20+ years married still going strong at 3-4 times a week....thank GOD
2006-07-07 09:23:42 · answer #10 · answered by N0_white_flag 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋