after 12 yrs of marriage this is gonna be his 3rd affair,i am depressed and need help on how do i get this matter solved
2006-07-07 01:50:15 · 22 answers · asked by sansy34 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Dont break the secret directly with him.
Well... Try to findout why he is looking else where. Hows ur private
life? Try to findout his tastes... make a checklist which you fulfil and refuse to do so. Once you understand what he wants, serve it with happyness.
But (most) men are always looking for opportunities. If 3rd one is gone, he will try for 4th one. I think he knows the tricks of the trade well.
Have an honest chat with him - not in your bedroom. Plan a vacation and do it there. Express your feelings and tell him how it hurts you.
I wish you all the best.
2006-07-07 01:55:12 · answer #1 · answered by Indian_Male 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you know why he is pursing outside of his marriage? Do you have children?
Depression is anger turning inward. Please do not let this go to far. Do you know what you want In your relationship and have told him? If you have and he's continued to ignore you, then by all means get the help you need and get separted from him until he deceides to quit or you have taken enough ABUSE and NEGLECT and file for a legal separation. This serious action may wake him up to realize what he truly has at home--a faithful and good wife which is truly the best of life.
You are a woman who needs respect and love for without that you will become a very lonely and sad person.
2006-07-07 09:00:05 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im so glad we have such intelligent people on this planet, so caring and loving but anyhow to your question. This is NOT your fault in any way, your problem yes, but not your fault. With a guy like this, understanding you probably still love him, but is this relationship worth saving when you cant trust him? He probably lies to you about them, like most cheating husbands when caught. You are way too good for him and rather then take it out on yourself, its definitely time to cut your losses and get rid of this trash. Its obvious this guy cant make a true committment to you or himself and instead of trying to find a way to save this ,thus the depression, dump him via the courts, take everything you can and are entitled to, and go find someone that would love to be with you and worships only you. They are out there, just be patient and your knight in shining armor will come riding up. Theres no real point, nothing to be accomplished by uncovering his unfaithfulness to him, because you already know it and know hell do it again, so go find a good divorce lawyer and move on to a better life. You deserve it! good luck
2006-07-07 09:04:48 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ultimately, the choice is yours, but I would say it is time to speak with a divorce lawyer. He is not living up to his vows of MARRIAGE! Once can be a mistake, twice is bad, three times shows no respect for you or the vows you took. Once someone cheats on you and you forgive them, they take it as forgiving and excepting what they have done. He will continue to do it. The only way to stop him is to not give him the chance to cheat on you ever again. Let another woman go thru the pain and heartache of him, you deserve to find someone who will love you for you and cherish you for the person you are.
2006-07-07 08:55:34 · answer #4 · answered by Melinda S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry honey but some things do not change. Once they know they can do it to you once they'll do it again. Leave him. It's your only choice unless you want to stay in an unhappy marriage and continue to complain about his cheating. I'm sorry you're going through this but I would have been out on the day I found out about the first one.
2006-07-07 08:56:36 · answer #5 · answered by sweetypie9 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3 strikes and your out... He obviously does not care about the relationship with you... Have you discussed the issue at hand with him. After 3 that should be a strong indication to kick him to the curb and move on.
2006-07-07 08:53:58 · answer #6 · answered by Totti 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your hubby is doing affair, then what you are doing, you too show him that you are not gone case, you too have charm to bring down males. I can help you in this matter write me on my mail id as vrushal22in@yahoo.co.in
2006-07-14 06:54:00 · answer #7 · answered by vrushal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the bible it says a divorce can be sought if the husband or wife lays with another. The contract can be null and void in the case of adultry.
I am so sorry you are dealing with this.
Best of luck with your decision.
2006-07-07 11:49:10 · answer #8 · answered by AccountableLady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a hard choice to make about your relationship with your husband. Talk to him and find out what his intentions are about your marriage to him. Once you get a response, then you can decide what you want to do.
2006-07-07 08:55:46 · answer #9 · answered by WC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say 3 strikes and your out. Pick yourself up and walk out on him. Clearly he has no regard for you and your feelings, as he feels 3 affairs is Ok.
Leave him.
2006-07-07 08:56:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋