What's your opinion on why so many marriages fail these days, what are they doing wrong?

Answer 1

You know, I'm a lot less worried about people who get divorced than people who are so miserably unhappy in their marriages.

I mean, why is marriage so miserable for some people. The answer "people just don't know anything about commitment" is just to acusatory and simplistic. I believe people really do want to create strong, stable families and would sacrifice everything to learn how to make their marriage work and not just work, but work well.

I think marriages might be failing because there seems to be only two alternatives, stay married and miserable or divorce and do it alone.

Answer 2

First thing is getting married too easily....too fast. Without giving any serious thought about what they are really getting into.
Plus, this is really the first generation to grow up in a society where a good majority of families are broken. The tendency is to live as they lived. They see divorce as an easy option to get out of a marriage. Why talk thiings out, why work at making a marriage work? It's so much easier to just get out of it.
Divorce used to have a stigma that came with it...now it's just another word.
I think another big issue is that adultery has lost all significance in our society as well. It's a common occurence to know family members, coworkers, friends, that are cheating on their spouses.
A lack of respect for themselves and their partners is another reason.
And although I'm not a religious fanatic or a 'Jesus freak', I think that a lack of religion is a big part of all of the above. Morality and ethics is at an all time low in our society...as people drift away from the faiths they were raised in.

Answer 3

My opinion is that for too many people marriage is based on feeling good. Love is not a true feeling, it is more a state of mind. You have to work at it. Since most people fall out of love, they try to fill that void with an affair that breaks the marriage. This is on top of the marriages that are built on lies or cheating spouses who are bored with their marriage. Finally, some of them fail because of lack of respect for the other party by both sides.

Answer 4

Compatibilty, communication, and effort to build the relationship are all very important. I think most people focus on that pretty well. What I saw in my own marriage and in so many others is the idiotic belief that this person you are married to is supposed to make you happy. And when you aren't happy, you try to change that person to be the spouse who will make you happy. When that doesn't work, you throw up your hands in dismay and say, "well, I tried to save the marriage but it is hopeless."

The real answer is you tried to find happiness through marriage. As my mother told me a few years ago, the only person who can make you happy is the guy/chic you see when you look in the mirror. No one else has that responsibility. Until you make peace with that person you will be unhappy in marriage.

My mother was married over 50 years until my father died and was unhappy most of those years until she figured out she was looking to my dad for her self-esteem and happiness. He was too hard on her, to be sure, but that wasn't why she was unhappy. She thanks God that their last 15 years together were the best years of her life.

Answer 5

I think alot of marriages fail because somewhere in the marriage things get to be so routine. Boring. Couples get to be so comfortable with one another they seem to loose all interest in the person they married and begin to feel like they need something more. Affairs, alcohol, etc. It could be anything to fill that void in their life that seems to be missing. There's a million and one reasons marriages fail. This is just one out of a million.

Answer 6

Many reasons..

1) False expectations
2) www.marriedmenmeetgirls.com
2) Workload/Stress
3) Woman Right Movements
4) Different goals/ideas
5) Hot secretaries
6) External substances -drugs/alcohol
7) Stripper joint
8) Alimony/Good lawyers
9) NFL
10)Vibrator

Answer 7

because we live in a fast food world.
fast marriage, fast divorce and everything in between....
we don't want to take the time to work on a marriage. a marriage has to be constantly worked on. if you take it or your spouse for granted things start to crumble.

we marry people we aren't suited to be with.
we live with the idea already planted in our mind if this doesn't work i can try the next. Not the idea we will not divorce. we will work together on our happiness, sadness and everything in between.

I am married to a soldier. Your marriage and mind set has to be stronger then most. when your spouse can be sent away for months..... come home.. then be sent away again.. you have to learn to reconnect quickly... how to manage a bond while still apart... it is difficult and most of the marriages are not surviving.

Answer 8

I believe too many people do not take the time needed to make a relationship work. Marriage is hard and in today's society, if it doesn't come easy they want to give up.

Answer 9

Not communicating enough. Not putting in enough effort. People assume that strong marriages just happen. They don't. They require constant attention, honesty, respect, communication and trust. And the acknowledgement that there will always be bad times and well as good times.

Answer 10

first of all people get maried for the wrong reasons. what they are doing wrong is hiding the truth to who they really are. some just cannot be monogamis any more. it is to easy to slip of off a ring and go out get drunk and have sex with the first hot girl they see. instead of working out or through problems they call it quits cause it is so easy now days it is unreal. divorce lawyers are on every block you turn down. however there are good reasons for getting divorced.....abusive relationships....adultry.......abusive to children..........lack of communication between the two partners.....then there are the stupid reasons....not enough sex.....can't get along......to gain money through alamony......to get on public aid.......they let their parents get in the way....etc..