You have recently been offered the dream job that you have waited five years for. The problem is you would have to miss the first 12 weeks of your new born baby's life, along with relocating your family 3 hours away from all your relatives. Your spouse would also be responsible for the baby all on her own the first 12 weeks.
By moving you would gain financial stability and your spouse would not have to work.
Do you take the job?
2006-07-05 15:33:58 · 25 answers · asked by GJB 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Unfortunately - not knowing you - just the thought that you wrote the question displays a strong sense of commitment that you have for your spouse. I don't think "miss" is the proper word. If you and your spouse have an open line of communication available and you both agree (to a certain extent) that this choice will not only benefit you and your personal, professional goal (hoepfully you support each other) but also a financial future and commitment to your wife and new born child, then I say go for it. I think we often forget that when we make the decision to marry; it's not longer just "my" decision - it immediatley turns into "our" decision. Although it's very difficult to pass when opportunities knock on our door - I'm sure once you and your wife have had the opportunity to fully discuss ALL options, you will make the decision best for not only you and her; but what is best for this new born child as well. Some say the first 12 weeks don't matter. I beg to differ because I have had the opportunity to read that zero to five years of age are very important in a child's development. However with the proper "team" anything can happen and anything can be accomplished. I wish you and your spouse the patience with each other to fully discuss all the options available to make a decision that is accepted by both parties that in return will keep a healthy, happy future for all involved. Good luck!
2006-07-06 08:31:13 · answer #1 · answered by Irish01 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You sound like you're the male in the relationship? I wouldn't take the risk if you were the maternal parent but, if your spouse is OK with it, I say go for it. The first 12 weeks can be made up in the next 50 years. With your dream job, you will be happier, thus bringing a positive energy to the child's' life. If you ditch this opportunity, you could hold an unconscious grudge to your kid and not even know it. Stay at home mom's are some of the best out there.
Good luck man, 3 hrs is nothing but a long drive.
2006-07-05 22:41:00 · answer #2 · answered by mymolly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say take the job. i mothered 2 small children while my hubby was TDY for the Air Force.. it will be hard on her, but she has family that can help.. by taking the job you are making it better for your family.. 3 hours away is still close enough.. it's not like your moving outta the country..
by making a small sacrifice now you will be making it possible for her to stay home and really be able to care for the children... the first 6 yrs are the most important...
by getting a job that pays better you are also going to be able to afford the things to help your children in the long run..( sports, dance, music lessons, ect ect..)
if she loves you she will follow you where ever you need to go..she will stand by you, appreciate you.. there comes a time in your life when you have to take the road less traveled.. have faith that it will all work out..
2006-07-05 22:45:53 · answer #3 · answered by Betty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I take the job because the reality is that financial stability is a big deal in taking care of your family. Its not everything but it is a big something....
It also depends on what the other options are, can you work closer to home for just a little less? Can you afford to wait 12 weeks and then be reasonably assured of getting a similar position? and so on...
2006-07-05 22:38:50 · answer #4 · answered by kroe_6 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I would. A father misses usually misses these early stages. Why should the mother always be the one to be with the child? As long as one of you is with the baby during the first 12 weeks, I say go for it!
And three hours is not really that far away. Cross-country would be far away.
2006-07-05 22:38:15 · answer #5 · answered by rednecklady17 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh hell yeah, what are you nuts? make movies for him to view of the first 12 weeks, get someone to help you, it's only 12 weeks, for a life time of financial stability, it's a small sacrifice, there are guys in iraq that miss the first 6 months of their baby's life to protect you. I know the hormones get to kicking up and you are all by yourself but you got yahoo answers, good luck......
2006-07-05 22:40:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats a tough one bud...it all depends on if you want to look long term...vs...short term. I would have a hard time not taking what better supported my family. I would try my best to balance both...do whatever I could to hit two birds with one stone...but I think even more depending on my current financial situation...if I was struggling...I would deff persue the job to make life easier long term...but if I was doing ok...and the job was just vanity for some extra money...I would stay to be with the newborn...but I would discuss it with my other half...and hopefully she too would be understanding of that matter. But you really have to do whats best for your family...if thats share the load for an already overworked mother because she trully can't handle it all for a short period of time...then maybe that is the route that needs to be taken...
2006-07-05 22:40:02 · answer #7 · answered by lanceh13 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely Yes......It's only for 12 weeks and the reason is to stabilaize your family. It seems more logical to miss the 12 weeks than to be strap for cash for much longer. If you stay then the wife would be happy and then eventually become mad because the family is broke. If you leave she will be mad but then get over it because you can support your family.
Take that job and congratulations.
2006-07-05 22:39:51 · answer #8 · answered by Kenya_7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course not!!!! even if its ur dream job ur baby is most important right? RIGHT! and the first 12 weeks is the time where the baby needs to be held by it's mother and nurtered!! so yea u decide which is most important: a baby that will always be in ur life and is the most important OR a job that has no garantee that will last!!!
2006-07-05 22:38:34 · answer #9 · answered by Shayla <3 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is one of the reasons I don't have kids. Life first, kids afterwards.
Take the dream job. Just make sure you'll be happy doing it. If its not going to make you happy, then you should not do it. You'll family will always be there for you - make it a point to at least spend a day once a week with your family.
2006-07-05 22:39:38 · answer #10 · answered by NyceGyrl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋