how can i ever learn to fully trust and believe anyone again ???please help ???
2006-07-05 12:00:11 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I don't know, but I'm working on it. Every time this happens, it steals a little bit of your soul away. And it becomes harder and harder to trust someone because your experience tells you "Trust NO ONE."
However, I do believe there are people who can be trusted. You just need to find them. Actually, I have recently found a few trustworthy friends, but still find it difficult to fully trust in a romantic relationship. If "once burned" is "twice shy," then I should be the shyest person on the planet !!!!
Do we perhaps give our trust too easily at first? Making it easier to get burned? Maybe we do. I have learned to back off and not be too trusting at first, but it's a war because I WANT to be able to trust. The world feels so terribly unsafe when we can't and we feel so terribly alone.
Taking baby steps is probably the answer to learning to trust again.
2006-07-07 10:31:01 · answer #1 · answered by Christy 6 · 5⤊ 2⤋
Time heals...when you are being betrayed you feel like what you thought was there died...so it's a form of death...a form of loss...Any death no matter how devastating, will eventually become part of you that makes you who you are in the future...a better, stronger and wiser person. This is one of those times when having a belief in God is very helpful. As a Christian I believe that we are not made to manage certain situations in our lives all by ourselves. Forgiveness does not mean ever trusting the person again...it means to give up all the hard feeling when you think you have suffered enough...and giving it all to God, ...so you can move on and breathe. Being cheated on is a terrible experience. My Mom said to me, " When someone cheats and you know you didn't do anything to cause it...then clearly it is not you who has a problem...it's him. Don't blame yourself...and do not let him/her blame you. You will survive this...I did.
2006-07-05 19:15:42 · answer #2 · answered by justmemimi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did it after 21 years of marriage that I thought was real and true and I was such and IDIOT. But for some reason I don't have the problem with trusting again. Don't know why. I just refuse to let that b****** ruin the rest of my life. Good luck. Trust God. I'm sorry for your pain, it is really, really, hard, but it will get better. Make lots of friends and just get involved doing things you enjoy and the rest will come if you just don't try too hard.
2006-07-05 19:09:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok First realize...his cheating is not about you!!!!
He would have done this no matter who he was with. That step alone will allow you to forgive. Second..realize that you have to work on you..meaning take care of you. Think nice things about yourself do nice things for yourself..lile exercise and eat right. You want to bbecome what it is you want. Be honest with yourself about your faults and try to become a better person. Then you will not have the time to worry about trusting again..: - )
2006-07-05 19:42:44 · answer #4 · answered by dragonsandwater 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its hard to get over it but what I tell myself is do I want to be here sitting thinking about it over and over again depressing my self making myself feel bad or go out with my friends and meet new people trust some where out there is someone waiting for you like me I broke up with my guy of 3 years disrepecting me in front of some people who then raped me that night but I had to move on I started going out with friends then my brother had a girl became friends later she had a guy friend that had met me before and wanted to hook up with me we went on a date and had everything in common and now we are engaged so GOOD LUCK but please don't just close yourself from the world there is alot of beatiful things out there.
2006-07-05 19:09:11 · answer #5 · answered by nena24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First thing you do is make sure YOU NEVER speak poorly about your EX. (That makes you a target for the next guy).
Second, never tell a man what you want in a man (let him be HIMSELF, not an actor potraying the role YOU DESIRE)
Third, when a man shows you that he has unfaithful characteristics, do not judge him ( just realize that he is not the one, but use him to teach you his patterns)
Fourth, Pray to God everyday to send good people your way (wearing white attracts good people)
2006-07-05 19:06:46 · answer #6 · answered by j j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust in yourself, trust your instincts, your first gut feelings...pay attention to! Prayer helps too! Good luck sweetie!
2006-07-05 19:06:31 · answer #7 · answered by CathyakaKitty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The right person will come along someday and change all of that.
2006-07-05 19:33:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could talk to someone who has been through the same thing you have been through,
2006-07-05 19:06:58 · answer #9 · answered by valsheer 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe in yourself first... that's the root of your problem.
2006-07-05 19:03:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anna Belle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋