He comes from a totally different background (conservative type) I love him very much, but sometimes he just drives me nuts .....we always argue about things..I love him and i cant live without him, he's very nice and sweet and caring i know he loves me alot but..what can i do to make him change the way he thinks (old fashioned type of thinking)????
2006-07-05 10:24:38 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He always thinks he's right and what ever he says is 100% Right...and he's very judgemental about people....thats why we usually argue..he always thinks what he says is right even if it isnt...he kind of wants me to be like his mother or sister...(as in acting or being like them, the way they dress, talk, act, etc..)
2006-07-05 10:51:41 · update #1
Old fashioned style is a bit difficult to work with and to change it is even worst... You know the best thing is since you both love each other compromise on things... for example if you have problems than you give ur solution and do gives his and you try to see both which one will work better... i know he will try to make you think that his is better and all that.... but i have a few members in the family they are quite old now and its hard to deal with them... what we do is compromise with them all the time... like the new generation needs to show them that there are more than 1 way of doing a thing etc....
you will never be able to change him full to be prepared to adjust yourself too... it will not happen over night at all will take yrs... so hope you have a lot of patience.... and never give up.... if he loves you like you love him eventually it will happen!!
Best of luck!
2006-07-05 10:34:16 · answer #1 · answered by Pari 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Usually what happens in a marriage is that the partners ask each other a lot of questions about WHY they think the way they do. If you get him to explain ?WHY he prefers his approach to some things, maybe you will even be persuaded in certain areas, that his idea is best. If you discuss, in a practical way, why your approach to some things is more logical, he may be persuaded. You will both come out as more balanced people in the end, if you do some things his way and some things your way.
2006-07-05 10:35:49 · answer #2 · answered by magpie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really have to be more specific about what he does that annoys you. You have only mentioned the great things about him. Maybe you should focus on those things.
You can't change who he is, you should love him and respect him for being true to himself. Why do you argue with him, maybe you should see a marriage counselor about that. Are you actually arguing about what is bothering you, or are other things really behind the argument?
2006-07-05 10:37:09 · answer #3 · answered by Sara B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try introducing him to new things a little at a time. Like if he likes to be the one to do a specific thing maybe you should give it a try and show him that change is okay and that you can do things he does so maybe he can try things that you do, or want to do.
It is hard to try and get men to do anything that is outside of the norm. but its worth a try. I could tell ya a little more but what exactly are you referring to that is old fashioned??
2006-07-05 10:31:06 · answer #4 · answered by T agent 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After 24+ years of marriage, believe me you cannot change him. There is no talking that will do this. Either learn to live with it or start working your way out of the marriage. If you stay, be prepared to lose more and more of yourself and to always being the one to compromise. He is controlling and set in his ways. Mine is the same way. Cut your losses. I love mine too but I barely know who I am because his way is the only way. I'm working my way out of mine. I've had enough! Good Luck.
2006-07-05 11:01:01 · answer #5 · answered by kksay 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to tell you, but you can't change anyone, a person will only change if they want to. You know you were different when you got married. try to focus on things you have in common or the thigs you love about him. I want to choke the life out of my husband sometimes, and he knows it. I just tell him when he's working on my nerves and what he has done to agravate me, and we're making it.
2006-07-05 10:33:35 · answer #6 · answered by prfadfels 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am very up with the times as well as being very old fashioned. You are going to have to be more specific...
2006-07-05 10:35:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that he's driving you crazy. Tell him why, specifically. Accept the fact that you might be driving him crazy, too, and that he's going to tell you why.
Once that's out in the open, you'll be in a good place to figure out how to fix it.
2006-07-05 10:37:42 · answer #8 · answered by daveowenville 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1
2017-02-17 08:02:52 · answer #9 · answered by John 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really cannot change a person...what you get is what you get. But perhaps you and he can find a comfortable compromise?
2006-07-05 11:00:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋