Can you smother your friend if you want to talk everyday.?

Question

See. I have this best friend that recently move back home, OKlahoma. she says I text her or want to talk to her to much. can you smother a friendship by caring to much, She's like a sister to me. and I got alot happening right now in my life. Just need to talk about it sometimes, Does that make me Insecured if I want to talk everyday

Answer 1

i talk 2 my best mate @ least evry other day & we txt each other constantly!mayb shes jus trying 2 b nice & telling u that u talk 2 much is jus her way of saying that she doesnt view u in the same way nemore - after all ppl change.increase ur social circle & u wont rely on her as much

i dont think ur insecure, i think u need more than wot this girl is willing 2 give

Answer 2

Part of any relationship -- be it between family, friends or partners -- is subject to compromise. On a daily basis, you're negotiating the terms of your relationship. Sometimes, you and a new person discover you're quite close on terms, and you become friends; sometimes, you realize that you've grown so far apart from someone else that you can no longer negotiate effectively, and you cease being friends.

Right now, you want a friend to talk to; however, your "best friend" doesn't want to be that friend. For whatever reason* she's elected to spend less time with you than you want to spend with her. Either you adjust to those terms, keeping this friend but finding another to give you the attention you need, or you find a new friend and drop this one completely.

I'll tell you what, though; either you're a chatty cathy and need to ratchet it back a few notches, or you genuinely need someone right now due to what's going on in your life. Only you know for sure.

*Here's a good reason: perhaps she's afraid that if she moves back to her old home town and gets all the same friends without any new ones, she'll stagnate -- that is, she won't grow as a person. So, she's trying to spend less time hanging out with, and talking to, her old friends in favor of new ones. Here's another: it's possible that during her time away from OK she's become a different person, and one that is no longer interested in the same kind of friendship with you. That wouldn't mean there's something wrong with you; just that you've drifted apart.

Answer 3

It depends on the people involved. I have a friend back home who calls me everyday wanting to talk, and I just dont answer the phone because I'm too busy or there is nothing of substance to talk about. I then don't want to catch up with him when I do go home cause I'm annoyed about how often he calls me. Just look at the signs, yes you can smother her if talking everyday is what she considers smothering.

Answer 4

It just means she wants some space.....everyone has different needs and she is telling you (which is good). Yes, you can smother any relationship as the person you are smothering starts to feel like you are too needy. Let her call you, wouldn't that be nice for you, as then it shows she has reached out to you when she wants to talk with you?

Answer 5

I think the two of you are in a different place right now. Back off a little and when you contact her, don't forget to ask how she is and whats going on with her. It can get very wearing if the support is a one way thing. Give her a little space and time, thats all she's asking for. If you want to be a good friend to her, respect that.

Answer 6

Just tell her that you don't like talking on the phone. I've had that happen a couple of times.

Answer 7

nope - i used to talk to my best friend everyday for hours.

actually she called me - i did feel like i needed air every once in a while but it was all good

Answer 8

i don't think thats being insecured, thats wat friends r for, especially if u called her your best friend , she should understand that u missed her, and u 2 need too catch up on alot, so my best advised to u is that if she hates it wen u talk alot then thats not a good friend.

Answer 9

maybe it depends on the person

Answer 10

i think it depends