my girl's mother has been deceased for two years, and her ashes is on an altar in our house. Is this a good thing?
2006-07-05 07:20:44 · 25 answers · asked by oracle 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Mythology & Folklore
That is impossible!
If she is cremated she can not be "living" with you!
2006-07-05 07:25:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A good thing for the girlfriend, I'm sure. Losing your mother is a very hard thing to deal with. My Mom has been gone for 12 years now and it's still tough. If having her mother's ashes comforts her then you have no right to change that.
2006-07-05 14:25:40 · answer #2 · answered by LA :0) 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not a good or bad thing, if it helps with copping with loss perhaps its OK, but if its stop your friend natural process to let go and continue its a bad thing that in any case is only your friend's trouble, for the ashes its only a little more than dirt, we keep the love and we remember , the soul is with god the rest literally are ashes
2006-07-05 15:51:05 · answer #3 · answered by CNC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not really. It should be dispersed so that there is an ending for both of them.That's why Hindus disperse the ashes in the sea or a river. Also, if you are worried about ghosts, don't be. Once the body is completely destroyed, the link between the soul and body is sundered.
2006-07-05 16:00:13 · answer #4 · answered by Shankaree 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No is really freaky,but if it means that much to your girlfriend ,maybe you should ignore it. You could ask her if her mother had some kind of last wish to spread her ashes somewhere(like the sea or something). I'm afraid is her decision to make about her mother. I still don't know why people do this...
2006-07-05 15:38:39 · answer #5 · answered by Sakura ♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's perfectly fine. She loved her mother and you should respect that. If you really cared about a family member and thought that keeping his/her cremated remains around kept you close to them, you'd expect her to understand, right?
Two years isn't very long. This September will mark two years since my dad died, and sometimes I'm not over him at all, but sometimes I'm ok. So just support her and let her know you're there for her. If they're still sitting around when you guys are old and gray, then maybe you can talk her into having her buried or have her remains scattered ceremoniously or something, but for now, let her hold on to her through her remains and don't worry about it.
2006-07-05 14:23:35 · answer #6 · answered by chica_zarca 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it's kind of creepy. But if you expect her ghost to come wandering around, I doubt it. Cremation is a good way to burn away from the body. If you haven't noticed, most ghosts that come back were buried instead of cremated. So, you're fine, other than that it's creepy to have the ashes behind in the house.
2006-07-05 14:52:15 · answer #7 · answered by Opinion Girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It isn't bad. She jus tneeds to feel her mother close to her. If it makes you uncomfortable then maybe suggest to your girlfriend if she would like to take her mmoms ashes and spread them someone, like in her moms favorite place, or somewhere your girlfriend will feel fine with. Don't come across pushy, be kind about it then she might be more willing to do it. Good Luck!
2006-07-05 14:37:19 · answer #8 · answered by Mashiara 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't see how it's a bad thing. You could always put a tea-cozy over the urn if it's ugly. Or better yet, get her a new urn every year on her birthday. That way everyone gets a change of scenery.
2006-07-05 14:24:05 · answer #9 · answered by lcraesharbor 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, as long as she's not telling your girlfriend what to do. My mother's ashes were on my piano for ten years. They occasionally provided comfot to me. I finally buried her ashes along with my aunt's and my brother's.
2006-07-05 14:27:23 · answer #10 · answered by chilixa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well since she was cremated, I wouldn't use the term "lives" with you...
But who cares? It's a momento of your friends mother. It's nothing but ashes, don't let it bug you.
2006-07-05 14:23:59 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋