When I was in 11 grade, I got pregnant by my first love, and lost our baby for a number of reasons...after losing the baby, I lost my first love as well. I guess I lost him because of all the stress and depression involved with losing a baby. Well, after joining the military and losing hope of ever being with him, I got married, and my husband beat me metally, physically, and emotionally for every little thing-he was overly insecure in my eyes. Well, last year, it had been two years since I spoke with my ex and lost the baby, and he popped back up, I wanted closure, but my husband refused to give me that much respect, and once again beat me for wanting to obtain closure with my ex on the whole situation. I left my husband 3 months after we married becuase the abuse was all too much for me, now a year later my husband is insiting that we try...The problem with that is that once again, I have gained contact with my first love and all I can do is think about how happy he once made me.
2006-07-05 06:39:44 · 5 answers · asked by luvleesoljagurl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's not that I am unhappy about finding my first love, I just don't know what to do, or how to tell my husband that I may opt not to work our marriage out because I am still madly in love with someone else. I would say that my husband doesn't deserve me since he has put his hands on me time and time again, but I am afraid of what he will do if I leave him for good
2006-07-05 06:41:47 · update #1
Fear is no reason to stay in a physically abusive relationship. There are women's shelters everywhere and there are restraining orders. Get out of there NOW!! You don't love him, so leave him. This really has nothing to do with your ex, it has everything to do with your domestic violence situation. Your human, you made a mistake, sh*t happens...but don't stay there out of fear...he will only continue to beat you. Please, leave this monster before you involve your ex in all of this crap...do you really want him to get beaten up too? Leave first...THEN rekindle relationship.
2006-07-05 08:37:48 · answer #1 · answered by auntcookie84 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Stay away from your husband because as you said, he beat you and you are madly in love with someone else. You can never give your heart to him if you already gave it to someone else. Beware of the "ex-Mist." The Mist being the delusions of grandeur that the ex will be the best man ever. Be alone for a while and focus on yourself and healing from what happened to your baby. So sorry about that. Just stay away from both men and concentrate on yourself for a change. Then come back and make calculated, intelligent steps toward happines.
2006-07-05 07:01:32 · answer #2 · answered by ?girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its best to leave hubby because the abuse is going to continue. Its for your own safety. If your hubbys does not undersatnd and starts harrassing you then call the police and get a restaring order I dont know why you didnt do this sooner. Your hubby needs to learn not to beat you. On your first love figure out why hes back into your life. Figure out were your first love stands and what he has done with his personal life. And also what he wants he may just want to be freinds you never know. I think that you are lucky that at least you get to see your first love. I havent seend mine in 15 years I still think about him.
2006-07-05 07:00:21 · answer #3 · answered by beenie 21 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell hubby where to stick it, you had enough of his crap and he can kiss your ***. Take time for yourself and do the things you want, get to know yourself all over again before rushing into another relationship. If the 1st love truly loves you, he will understand and insist that you do this too.
2006-07-05 06:47:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave him get the cops involved,make sure he stays away from you. forget about an old flame, a start you a new fire with someone else.
2006-07-05 06:49:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋