I was going out with this girl 27 years ago when I was a student in Winnipeg, Canada. We had a good relationship based on trust and respect. We respected each other and never had sex. I left Winnipeg in 1980 for my home country.
I am now happilly married but she was divorced 3 years ago. My wife is fully aware and encourages me to continue to keep in touch with her.
I am now in LA, California on holiday visiting my kid brother. My ex wants to visit me in LA. I would love to meet up with her after all these years. She has indicated that we should have sex, some thing that we missed out 27 years ago. I love my wife of 24 years very very much. Should I go ahead to meet her in LA? Chances are we will end up in bed.
2006-07-05 03:43:36 · 35 answers · asked by Lost Sheep 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Man, don't fall for this. Your wife encourages you to SEE what you're going to say, what you're going to do, and if you have sense to see, your wife is now family, your wife is your best friend and you now got a family.
So, I am going to give it to you straight. Do you love your wife? Then action speaks louder. There are two types of love. The one where it's words but doesn't mean much because it can broken by lust, by money and lacks integrity and any regard for another human being.
The second kind of love, which is the most important one, is the one where it means, "intrgity, honour, respecting the other person's feelings, valuing what you have NOW and nurturing it. That is love, real love, the one you're suppose to give to your wife.
So no. I don't think you visit your ex. I suggest to grow up! Take responsibility of your feelings and recognise you're not alone. Your ex isn't a doormat even if she invites you for sex and it is very dangerous. It lead to further consequences for her and you, and hurt your marriage.
Your wife isn't someone to push aside and then come back for marriage life again. Respect what you have and next time your wife says, "no, no, keep in touch." You reply with words she WANTED TO HEAR..."love, why would I want to do that when I have the most amazing women sitting beside me, and the best friend I got."
You don't do that to your loved one mate.
2006-07-05 03:52:51 · answer #1 · answered by Adam Taha 4 · 10⤊ 1⤋
1
2016-05-07 15:35:09 · answer #2 · answered by Rolland 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you should meet your ex. Since you have said that you have love your wife very very much. Then why give yourself a chance to hurt someone you love very much? Put yourself in your wife's shoes. I'm sure your relationship with your wife is also based on trust and respect. If you betrayed her, how much trust will there be left?
If there is going to be a first time, there will be a second time and then it might never ends and things could go very wrong.
In any thing that you are going to do, think about the consequences before acting. Do not give yourself a chance to regret something because of a moment of foolishness. It's a basic that everyone knows but it's easier said than done.
For now, it depends on how much you love your wife.
2006-07-05 03:53:15 · answer #3 · answered by cherimoya 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife encourages you to meet her means that she trusts you, as for your ex she is simply using you to satisfy her own needs, and is less likely to have any sympathy for you, you have not known her for years and people changes with time,who knows she might even try to blackmail you after this and ruin your home,even if you think a night with her is worth your wife's trust,her love and a 24 year relationship,think how you would feel if your wife had been doing the same with you, think of your wife does she really deserve to be cheated? I think you will know the answer.
2006-07-05 04:03:29 · answer #4 · answered by Ananya M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are'nt ur 24 years of marriage enough for u to hold u back in ur family.is sex gonna prove that ur love was true?do u think love is proved only with carnal pleasures?i hav seen people dying in love without touching each other's bodies and not even marrying anybody else thru out their life.
u shud meet her only if she really wants to see and feel u n not ur body.
and what about ur wife?don't u owe anything to her.even if she permitted u to do that, u shudn't go for it.if she can think good for u then y can't u show ur fidelity for her?
just don't go for what u r planning.it will be a disrespect of ur wife, ur marriage, urs and even the love which u someday had for that woman.
and if nothing seems to be settling, just fancy ur wife having sex with some guy in a bed which once belonged just to u.and on asking,she replies u that he was her lover long time ago.they loved each other truely, so it was imperative to end up in sexual relationship.u'll get ur answer.
2006-07-05 04:08:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hell no! a wife that understanding is not something you can find everyday. If I was the wife I'd kick your butt for even thinking about it, and no way would you get anywhere near that girl without me right there to meet her too. I bet she wouldn't encourage you to keep in touch if she knew what your topics of conversation were. Danger, danger, danger if you bring home a disease from this girl to your wife, then what? think about that.
2006-07-05 04:03:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.....
My husband did this and all his feelings came back and for weeks and months he talked about her .. this and that and all they things thy did and what thy had in common.. in the end. i found out 3 yrs later.. He cheeted with her during are marriage.. I was devistated..
I though he loved me.. but then my kids who were only 4 and 5 confrimed it.. They said Mommy that is daddys girlfriends house tht is were we saw him kiss that lady....
So please just say NO NO NO dont take the chance that a new flame will egnite and your woodie will get hard and your wife will see it.. lol
2006-07-05 03:53:31 · answer #7 · answered by sillyatheart3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to be asking this question. Of course you should not meet your ex. It amazes me that your wife agrees with it - although maybe she is just waiting for good reason to divorce you. It sounds like you've got a lot of growing up to do.
2006-07-05 03:49:44 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no. You have not seen the wench in 27 years and she is already talking about hopping in bed with you? Sheesh. First, why would you want to take the chance of ruining your marriage, when you already know there is a chance you will bed her. Shame the hell on you, bud.
2006-07-05 03:47:06 · answer #9 · answered by rrrevils 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How much do cherish your marriage? Even if your wife dose not find out, the guilt you carry can ruin your marriage. Do you want to have sex with anyone else besides your ex? If you do then you have issues you should address.
2006-07-05 03:54:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋