well. the problem is I know this guy for like a month now. the first time I sow him I felt in love with him. he wants to marry me but my parents need time to know the guy more. even do I need to know him more. so my parents ask him to wait like a month or two to get ready fo the wedding then we can get marrid. he said no.
I feld so bad becouse I love this guy but I just cant get it why he dosent wanna wait. two month or whatever time will take. he said he loves me but if he do he have to do whatever it takes . for me. my parents didint ask him from enything hard. he said we need to go to the court first to marrifd then we can do the wedding letter. I said ok. but I just dont get it why hes want evrything to be fast. and my father didint agree he said. in 15 days I need more time I cant just give u my dougther in 15 days. also he dosent have peapers for the USA. means he eligal in here. my mom said he dosent love u he wants green card. if thats right there a lot of americans.
2006-07-05 03:01:45 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
and olso. hes trying to make me hates my parents. becouse they know I love him and they dont want me to marry him right now. I told him that I help my parents with rent and other think. he said no u soudint ur parent are useing u. and they just want u to be down like them. I dont know whats wrong with is guy. I kno whes mom devorced his father. when he was 8 and he grow up in problem s all life . he hats hef father. but he love his mother.enything she said to him. he say okay. I dont know. by th eway Iam 20 and he is 33. but I love him. I dont know what to do . I know my parents love me they just want me to be happy . I am tired talking to him. he was telling me to move out of my parents house and live in my own thet we can marrid the way we want. dont know what to. AN d if he say something he change the next day. I dont know. what to do. please enybady who can tell me or advice me please. thank u to everybady.
2006-07-05 03:23:08 · update #1
If this man loves you like he says he does, and he isn't after just a green card, then he will wait. If he is forcing you to choose between your parents and him, that isn't love, that is control,which is abusive. Most men that try to control you at the beginning of the relationship will wind up beating you before the relationship ends. DO NOT put yourself there. Your parents are wise people and they have lived a little more life than you, so I would listen to them, they will keep you out of harms way. I sense that your heart is already telling you to listen to your parents and wait to make sure that this man returns your love the way he should, that there is something there that isn't sitting right in your gut. Learn to listen to that because that is where God talks to you and He will guide you as much as your parents will guide you.
2006-07-05 03:10:07 · answer #1 · answered by hvnly_spector 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can't you see why your parents want you to wait? If he loved you he would wait a year, maybe two, whatever it took.
There are all kinds of red flags going up here and you better pay attention to them.
YOU ARE HIS TICKET TO BECOME A U.S. CITIZEN.
Can't you see that? After you are married, when is legally a US citizen, he may dump you like a hot potato.
Even if he doesn't you are getting married for all the wrong reasons. His love is becoming a U.S. citizen first and then maybe you.
Listen to your parents. You are getting to a place where you may very well be hurt badly. Do not jump at this no matter what he says.
If he knows you must wait he may just take off. You are much better off finding that out now.
2006-07-05 10:19:38 · answer #2 · answered by John B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gave the answer at the end. He wants legal status and you can give it to him. However...
You know, just as you fall IN love, you can fall OUT of love. Best to wait and see how you feel in a while. See, one problem is that women who marry illegals because they feel that they are in love usually wind up being Grass Widows. There is a good chance that a week after the wedding you will never see him again, because he will be able to get his papers.
Listen to your parents; they have your best interests at heart.
2006-07-05 10:11:21 · answer #3 · answered by Chief BaggageSmasher 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he loves U he can wait, if he has been illegal can't he be a little longer and give you some time???... or maybe he doesn't want to allow U to think at all and rush into it... ask him to wait and see what happens, if he cares, he is gonna make things right and respect U and UR family, if he is just in need of papers he's gonna rush to another girl.. and U don't wanna be used do you?
2006-07-05 10:09:20 · answer #4 · answered by Celebriel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's very possible that he only wants to marry you to get his green card and that's why he doesn't want to wait. Did he offer you money to marry him? Because that's a sure sign he's using you. Granted, I'm sure he cares about you and you really care about him. But if he truly truly loves you, he will understand and respect your parents and you and wait a little longer.
2006-07-05 10:06:02 · answer #5 · answered by Hypnotiq 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do not force yourself into this relationship...he is not into this relationship because he loves you. If he was, he would wait. You must know that your parents gave birth to you and they love you with all their heart...you are the most important thing in the world to them. If you marry him without giving yourself or your family time to know him well enough, you will regret it for the rest of your life. Respect yourself and get to know him better (and find out if he respects you)...you will never regret that!
2006-07-06 18:16:29 · answer #6 · answered by dragonfly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to your parents! He is in too much of a hurry for some reason. If he really loved you he would be willing to wait and respect you and your parents!
2006-07-05 10:08:27 · answer #7 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ur mom and dad are right.....dont trust the guy..
if a guy cant wait for 2 months....do u expect he will with u for whole life.........dump him.....u will find someone much better
2006-07-05 10:06:52 · answer #8 · answered by sunil 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents sound wise and are giving you some sound advice.
Give this some time... please, for the love.
2006-07-05 10:05:09 · answer #9 · answered by Sexy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋