2006-07-03 14:52:47 · 24 answers · asked by T C 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
would you want to be the baby of a parent (dad or mom) whos parent didnt want them? or would you prefer to be the baby who was wanted by both?
2006-07-03 15:01:15 · answer #1 · answered by a_muse@prodigy.net 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to really think this one out. First of all, how old are you? If you're below the age of 23, don't do it. If you're in your 30's then you need to let your girlfriend go, so that she can pursue the family that she so desperately wants to have.
Do you have a college education or a job that would support a baby, wife and yourself? Would your job put food on the table, enable transportation, and enable you to have a home or apartment and clothe the family? If the answer to any of these is "NO" then you need to explain these very good reasons why a child is not the best thing for either of you right now.
Secondly, if you're not ready to have a child, even if you can afford to do all of the above, then you shouldn't have a child. No matter how much you love her, the worst thing you can do is have a child if you're not ready.
2006-07-03 22:01:14 · answer #2 · answered by Healthnut 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To answer this effectively, it would be easier to have an age span we're talking about here. In any event, women in their 30's generally are worried about their biological clock running out, so depending on your gf's age, there could be specific reasons she wants a child.
If she's a young girl and wants a baby because so many of her friends are having kids, or she wants to become a mom, and therefore more in control of her life or wants a baby to have 'someone her very own to love", all of these are bad reasons to have a child.
First of all, if you don't want a child and someone in your life does, you have several choices........fight about it (and trust me, you WILL FIGHT about this issue eventually), give in and have a child (because alot of girls will trap you into getting them pregnant anyway), so keep your slickers handy, or walk away. Never assume you will resove this issue if one of you is unwilling to change their minds.
Beware of her reasons for WHY she wants a child. Is she responsibly mature and able to support a child? Are you?
2006-07-03 22:12:58 · answer #3 · answered by castlecollector2001 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been dating? If you're really serious about this girl, you're going to want to sit down and have a huge talk with her! You don't want a baby because thats your mature decision, and she's just going to have to respect that. YOU are just as much responsible for taking care of the baby as she is, and the question comes down to, if you both want a baby - are you both fiscally and physically able to take care of a baby, does she know how much work they involve?
2006-07-03 21:55:55 · answer #4 · answered by beauvoir_babe1865 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are all of u? Tell her the responsibiltis. Sometimes I want one too, just to have one and it attracts attension. But tell her the realities. How much it costs, the risks, everything.. when the kid grows up.. the college.. eveything. Don't have one. Make sure she knows you love her and would do anything for her.. but having a baby needs moretime to consider adn you should be married..
2006-07-03 21:55:25 · answer #5 · answered by Gaga <3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that you are not ready to have a baby . If she still wants one than she is just going to have to find someone Else to have the baby with. Don't do it just because she wants a baby. Its important that you want a baby too .
2006-07-10 16:39:52 · answer #6 · answered by sweenygirll 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first let her know, you love her , then gently , open the conversation. Tell her your just not Financially ready, cause it does takes alot, to raise a Baby til their 18- or, 21 for a Girl.It's a large Responsibility.!!!!! If she refuses to hear this, then you should consider moving on to someone more Mature! GoodLuck!
2006-07-03 22:08:12 · answer #7 · answered by sqishieears 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is something that both of you must agree on. If one wants and the other doesn't, then you have a real problem. The child deserves two parents who really want him/her. If there are conflicting feelings about this, and you still go ahead and have a kid, it could spell misery for everyone.
2006-07-03 22:07:18 · answer #8 · answered by G.V. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
only tell her the truth, if you truly dont want a baby, then dont let her force you into it.
if she is set on one, you wont change her mind either. so either:
1) give in to her and give her a baby or
2) time to move on even though you love her but you dont want a baby.
2006-07-03 21:58:35 · answer #9 · answered by cats3inhouse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? If she's at that age where she might not get another chance, u may want to consider it, or dont be with her. If she's not at that age, everyone's feelings old and change. You never know how u'll feel in the future. Hope this helps.
2006-07-03 21:55:30 · answer #10 · answered by felicia f 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋