What its means, pls tell.?

Question

There is a girl whom I love, but never tell directly as she works in my office. But she knows there is someonw I love very much. Then I fell sick and knowing that I was sick she dint call me, but sent an SMS, since I was little dissapointed. Even in the office she dint come to me, but sent an email asking about my health. I was upset I sent her an sms that thanks for asking I am fine. ovewr which she asked ...why this attitude. Then we had a general conversation..and she sms me ..why u expect so much from peopla, they r not as gud n helping as you are...over which I wrote ...now i will not expect anything from anyonw.but, may i ask what did I expect. except 2 words that I am loved and needed? don't i deserve that much? At which she called what does this mean, doe to my shy nature and not letting her hurt by telling her that i loved her, i lied that I was upsat that no body enquired about my healt while I used to do so much for people...then things like that.

After that I sms her.'thanks for calling, but if you cant understand my silence, you will never understand my words.' at which she replied .. "got it, but what can I do if I cant understand either. I am like that only and franlky speaking...I AM NOT WORTH IT"
At this i felt sorry and called her up and againg lied that I was talking about people's behaviour, because I dint want her to feel bad.

Now, I am asking you guys what should I do. She is a good looking girl and I am average guy, I loved her for her intellect and nature...help me what to do now?

Answer 1

TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL.........WALK ON THE WILDSIDE..........YOU MIGHT LIKE THE RESULTS!!

Answer 2

You are not going to like my answer, but it sounds to me like you have a long way to go before you will be ready for this girl's love, or anyone else's. You think of yourself as a kind and giving person, and she tells you that you are, but are you really? A kind person gives himself to the world without resenting the world for its lack of appreciation or reciprocation. Perhaps you are simply too shy and weak at this point. It sounds like your own kindness is there because it is the only way you know how to relate to people. That is not attractive. They may feel sorry or kind towards you, but they will not admire you as a person, or let you into their lives. You can only be good to another person by being strong in yourself. And when you learn that, you may not be as giving as you think you are.

You are also acting weird around her, all these SMS messages. The ones you describe actually sound kind of snide and nasty. You're complaining to her and feeling sorry for yourself, probably trying to get her attention and sympathy. Why don't you get her attention some other way?

It seems obvious that she knows or at least suspects you are interested in her (love, I think, is a delusion or overstatement on your part -- you hvae to know someone to love them). If you are very lucky, she may have some feelings for you. But you aren't going to bring them out the way you're going. Why the heck do you think you are protecting her by hiding your feelings? Do you think that lying to her is some kind of favor? Look, in the real world people act on their feelings and communicate them. That's how people fall in love, not by hiding. The best thing you can do is to let her know, not with some big act of romantic craziness, but the way everyone else does. Teasing, flirting, doing nice little things, spending time together. There is a language of love, and you do not seem to know it. If you ever want things to work you need to start learning.

You have a long way to go. I hope that someday you look back on this, and maybe the advice I and others are giving you, and tell yourself we were right. Otherwise, you are going to go through quite a few of these one-sided love affairs.

Answer 3

People say they 'find' love, as if it were an object hidden by a rock. But love takes many forms, and it is never the same for any man and woman. What people find then is a certain love.

Love, like rain, can nourish from above, drenching couples with a soaking joy. But sometimes, under the angry heat of life, love dries on the surface and must nourish from below, tending to its roots, keeping itself alive.

Lost love is still love. It takes a different form, that's all. You can't see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a dance floor. But when those senses weaken, another heightens. Memory. Memory becomes your partner. You nurture it. You hold it. You dance with it.

Answer 4

It sounds like you are really unsure of yourself and that you have stronger feelings for her than she does for you. People don't always love us back just because we love them. If she doesn't love you like you do her then I hope you look elsewhere and find someone who will. There are a lot of good people out there that would appreciate someone who is loving and caring. Please don't let this stop you from caring about other people. Also, it's not usually a good idea to get involved in relationships with people you work with. Maybe you need to get out more and meet people. It sounds like you need to look after yourself more. Be good to yourself. Don't waste your time with someone that isn't interested. Also, if she knows there is someone you love very much but doesn't know it's her, then she probably would never even THINK you were interested in her. Know what I mean?

Answer 5

How about you quit hinting to her and tell her the truth? Yea Yea you come across as shy but if you really loved her then you wouldn't lie to her. What makes you so sure that she would be hurt by knowing that you love her? How do you know you love her if she's a co-worker?

Well if your feeling better now why don't you tell her your feeling better and ask her out to a casual lunch for starters. She will never respond to you how you would like her to if you don't tell her how you feel.

Good luck and I hope you feel better.

Answer 6

People love the strong, silent type, not someone who is bashful, shy, etc., etc., bring your self-esteem up and be proud of who you are, stand tall, stand strong, and then maybe she will notice the change in you and maybe she will go for you. Remember it isn't the things that YOU do for people, expecting something in return. Sometimes nice people come in last and the ones who act like jerks are the ones who get the breaks in life, doesn't make sense, but that's how it works in reality.

Answer 7

Leave her alone. You are a very reactionary, with expectations for other people. You are setting yourself up for continual self disappointment. You have this girl in your own romantic fantasy. She is just living her life and why would she owe you anthing?
You are expeting a reaction to your action and she really just wants you to mind your own business and NOT project your over reactive feelings towards her.
Sounds like you need to Up your self esteem and not define yourself with how others react or don't react to you.
You are wasteing time and energy on something that is one sided. You are creating Drama over something that is non existance except in your mind.

Answer 8

well since she works with you , ask her to lunch on your lunch break.
After a few lunches and thing go well send her flowers since you know where she works and info.
Then go in for dinner date make reservations at her favorite place to eat. When you get her to dinner have flowers there for her Nothing cheap.and a nice bottle of bubbley!
Next depending on the depth of feelings for this woman.
A tennis braclet , anclet or neclace for the first few gifts
then move up to letting her go shopping on you and then make sure she gets shoes no matter what..... because the size of a womans shoes is the same size as her ring finger (good to know for incase you latter want to propose or just buy a ring for her!

Answer 9

First, you are playing with fire by attempting to "love" someone (romantically) you work with. Like someone said earlier, there is a difference between co-workers and friends. Also, you need to ask yourself, do you really love her. And how do you know, if you only work with her. Do you really know what love is? Sounds like you might not love yourself, so before you can give love to another you have to learn to love yourself first. I say don't pressure her. This is a work relationshio, maybe you should leave it at that.

Answer 10

It means you need to learn to take care of and love yourself first, before anyone else can. You're not being dishonest with her, but 2 yourself, and she can sense it. The successful man in relationships, even the average joe, knows himself, his qualities, and has confidence, which is the key. You need 2 put the expectations on yourself.

Answer 11

Most of the screw ups in my life have been due to a failure to communicate honestly.
having said that as the man above says: office romance is a bad idea.