Would you be furious? Feel deceived? Or respect his feelings and give into to what he wants? Would you stay married to him, and pretend that everything is all right? OR would you seek counselling?
2006-07-03 11:58:38 · 24 answers · asked by Bu Ang 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would not only feel deceived, but cheated out of a family. I am assuming you discussed this prior to marriage...a change of mind on his part would really frost my flakes. If you want children and he doesn't, you need to rethink the whole relationship. Why would you cheat yourself out of children? If you really don't want kids, then the whole point is moot, isn't it? Did he give you reasons? Are they valid ones, or is it just fear on his part? Really look at all sides to this before proceeding.
2006-07-03 14:52:17 · answer #1 · answered by auntcookie84 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, did you two talk about these things before you got married and agreed on having children and now he has changed his mind? If that is the case, my question would be: What made him change his mind all of a sudden? Yes, if this is the case then you should both go to marriage counselling. If it was decided before you got married then that is something that you will have to live with since you knew you wanted children and you married him anyway, thinking that he would change his mind after you say "I do". If this is the case then you should go to counselling. Good luck.
2006-07-03 19:42:39 · answer #2 · answered by Catfishchic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe just maybe he feels inmature and just not ready to take on the responsibilty of being a father. Perhaps he scared for some unknown reason, maybe something happened in his childhood that you dont know about, and hes afraid the same thing might happen with him, There could be a trillion reasons for this but if you love him enough to get married then talk it out with him telling him you just want some kind of timeframe and reassure him youll respecthis answer. Cause as a father of 2 adult women all men secretly would love to be a father someday no matter how macho they seem now
2006-07-03 19:07:10 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Didn't you discuss this very important decision before you got married! Big mistake if not. Having children is the biggest responsibility on earth , this should have been discussed. I would think that you and your husband should sit down and discuss this. If after you talk, he does not want children and you do then you must do what your heart tells you. Can you live with your husband without ever having children and be happy! If you can, stay with him. However, if you feel in your heart you want children someday and you stay with your husband without having children you may end up resenting him and you will both divorce eventually anyway. Please take care and God Bless
2006-07-03 19:08:16 · answer #4 · answered by sam04m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well this conversation should have been made before you got married. Did you just assume your husband wanted kids or did you sit down and discuss it?? If you both agreed that you would have kids one day then OMG I would be pissed off, no question in my mind. I wouldn't pretend everything was alright, I would seek counseling.
2006-07-15 07:24:58 · answer #5 · answered by chillilyn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel deceived because if you want children and he doesn't, then he should've told you that before you guys got married because this is something important.
I would let him know my feelings and have a heart to heart talk with him. Then if things still aren't working out, go seek counselling. Good luck!
2006-07-03 19:01:26 · answer #6 · answered by sweetcinnamon92 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having children or not should have been discussed long before the marriage was even thought of. If he lead you to believe that he wanted children when you got married then the marriage was based on false premises. I would certainly at least discuss it with a lawyer or a counselor, if you don't have children you may be able to get an annulment and avoid all the hassles of divorce.
2006-07-15 14:37:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is this just his feelings at that moment?
If he knew I wanted kids when I married him and then later after we were married said he didn't want them, I would seek counseling for a start. I'm not sure if it would go as far as a divorce.
I was engaged once, and one of the reasons I broke up with him was because I wanted kids and he didn't.
2006-07-03 19:05:07 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did he not mention that fact before he married you? not sure how it couldn't come up at one point in time, but if he did a 360 and said yes at first to children and then said no, i don't blame u for feeling deceived. if he did say something previous to the marriage, then that would b your fault. can't expect that just because you're married that you gotta have kids. does he mean no biological children with you? would adoption or foster parenting be an option?
2006-07-13 20:39:53 · answer #9 · answered by baybeegrl5 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would all depend on if you talked about having kids before you got married. If he said he wanted them and then changed his mind I would be furious and want counseling
2006-07-10 22:37:57 · answer #10 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋