please only serious answers.
2006-07-03 11:31:46 · 24 answers · asked by kellbell 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Why are you trying to help her? Most likely shes going to push you away if you try to stop her. Theres a big difference between cutting and killing yourself. Some people just like a little pain, so who are you to stop her?
Try to be a bit more accepting and tell her you support her and are there for her if she DOES need anything from you, but that her actions bother you.
But don't sit there telling her its wrong because theres nothing wrong with a little pain.
Everyone has their own reasons for doing what they do and you have no right to judge her.
2006-07-03 11:36:34 · answer #1 · answered by TiFFeRz 4 · 4⤊ 4⤋
I work with victims of sexual assault and sexual abuse. The majority of girls who begin cutting, do so because they have been victimized. The most important thing you can do for her is be there. Ask her if anyone has ever hurt her. Cutting is typically a way for someone to try to express the pain they feel inside, and that pain usually comes from some kind of sexual abuse. This situation, no matter how much you care about your friend, is probably too much for you to deal with on your own. At some point, if she won't go for help, you need to tell someone. Your mom, a teacher, counselor - any adult you feel you can trust. If she continues for too long, it will become a dangerous compulsion and she will require intensive help to stop. There is also the chance that she will misjudge and could accidentally kill herself. Sometimes, being a good friend means doing what is best for someone even if they hate us for telling. At some point, she will thank you.
2006-07-03 11:40:52 · answer #2 · answered by yellowbugchickoh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's bad.. Well, do you know why she is upset? If not, maybe you should try and find out and see if there is anything you can help with the things she is upset about. You can advise her on the things that make her upset and maybe tell her what she can do and not hurt herself like that. Maybe she doesn't have any self-love because she is doing things to hurt herself. So, the things that cause her to be upset to hurt herself are probably something she sees as more important than herself. You should tell her that when she gets upset over some things, she is seeing those things as more important than herself and she is also letting those things take control, and she shouldn't let those things take control of herself. Also tell her that it doesn't help to hurt herself, nor would that help to solve any problems. She should probably learn to have more confidence in herself and love herself more, then she won't get easily upset with things or let them be in control. Also, hurting oneself doesn't help to solve the problem. She is just hurting herself. Learn some more self-confidence and self-love or anger management.
2006-07-03 12:53:40 · answer #3 · answered by Raines 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how that is... I used to cut myself...
One thing you can try doing, is invite her to your place ( unless youa re roomies) make dinner, and calmly ask her if there is something you can do to help her... or to help her get some help from other sources. Tell her you are conserned, and assure her you are not judging her. You just don't want to see her in pain.
There are counselors out there willing to help, and they are not judgemental and will not force her to do anything she does nto feel comfortable doing. And, in some cases, their services may be free.
Not much can be done if she doesn;t want help. A calm approach from a conserned close friends usually has a good way to push the envelope a little.
I hope this helps
2006-07-03 11:45:48 · answer #4 · answered by Onyx Dracona 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
any self defeating patteren like this is because they see a small reward in the abuse.
The abuser gets the reward of adrenaline and silence. (it temporarily hides from the problem, till the frustraition builds up higher)
The bully gets the reward of false self-esteam (that why they keep having to replenish false self-esteam)
The depressed turn frustraition and hatred inward, and blame self,.. while the above blame others.
What is there to be depressed about? What frustraitions are there that are blown out of proportion?
One thing I learned is,.. all you are is what you do in life. Then you find a way of interfacing with people baced upon who you really are. Instead of the things that are artifical to the spirit.
You need physical experiances to release endorphines and adrenaline. You need hobbies that chalenge your mind. You need friends and family for the spirit. Help him/her with all of these (a psychologist can only try to entice him/her into doing these things once a month. People need more. I'd suggest starting with finding a remedial work out schedual first thing in the morrning. With a friend for moral support. Then imporove on every thing you start.
Writting out detailed goals tends to help. Then constantly reevaluating them helps you learn.
2006-07-03 11:43:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is very serious and there are many things you can do. If you are in school you can report it to the school nurse. You can even call the police because it is illegal to attempt to kill yourself. They can take her to the doctors where she can get psychological help and therapy which is what she needs.
She may get upset at you for doing this but just know that you are doing it because you love and care for her.
2006-07-03 11:35:58 · answer #6 · answered by ♫*♥Vamp♫*♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you can't help her. My ex-wife used to do that. She was wacked out. Actually, her best friend tried to stop her one time. Needless to say we all ended up spending the night at the hospital after she ended up cutting herself to the bone.
As for your friend, she'll need a good psychiatrist or something.
2006-07-03 11:35:51 · answer #7 · answered by Poncho Rio 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, first you should talk to maybe your parents and definatley to her parents just make sure they don't go balistic on her cause that will make things worse. Then talk to the couselor at your school, or the preacher at a church, some one you can count on to help you. The just pray. Possibly if you can get her by herself with you with no interruptions you can talk to her but still ask adults.
2006-07-03 11:34:54 · answer #8 · answered by hat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to Google and do a little research on Tourette's Syndrome. This is sometimes a symptom of it.
http://www.google.com
Search for the words: Tourette's cut
2006-07-03 11:43:54 · answer #9 · answered by Leadfoot 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry I Dont No What To Tell. But Good Luck.
2006-07-03 11:34:48 · answer #10 · answered by mks 7-15-02 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋