How do I decide to end a 20 year marriage?

Question

Kids are leaving for college. We have nothing in common other than them. Why should I stay?

Answer 1

Hun i no how you feel the kids are grown and now you are left with the one person you thought you could live with for the rest of your life BUT
you never saw the years go past because you had the kids there problems there life's now they are not so independent on you when you turn to your husband
your are like strangers he chats about work but says's nothing more
if you sat opposite you could sit there for hours because you both have nothing to say
to each other because there is nothing there
oh gosh if this sounds like you i would get out and start a life every one deserves a life
no one should feel they are alone in a marriage
people will say go see a counciler but when things have got this bad i think it is time to think of YOU and go
you should really sit and talk i think your husband deserves that after 20 years of marriage
but i am sure you will find a way to tell him i feel you are a Strong person do what you feel is right
good luck in what you do in your life
respect
shaz

Answer 2

You shouldn't, not yet, you should wait until the kids are gone and then try dating again. This actually happens alot, couples have been so busy working and raising the kids that they forget why they live in the same house. You two were in love once and had what it takes to stay together all this time, don't give up yet, unless your heart has already gone somewhere else. This could be a great time in your lives, you can finally be the two of you! You've got 20 years in, at this point what is another 6 months of really trying to get back to being a couple? I know so many single guys that are disheartened by trying to find a good woman to be with, don't be in such a hurry to get out there, it isn't all its cracked up to be, if it was people would never get married a second time. They leave one marriage and then spend their time looking to get in to another one and that means they don't really like what they find.

Answer 3

You DONT. You made an oath to not part until death. To stay with each other through the thick and then thin. Marriage is not meant to be something perfect and happy all of the time. It is a committment though that must be stuck with and not broken. Dont let your emotions affect the right decision.

Answer 4

If there is no love then staying would be pointless. If the only that kept u together were the kids and they r gone,end it. No one wants to be married and unhappy. Talk to the kids and see what they have to say.

Answer 5

Dont be a martyr and do something about it.If you are not happy then you should decide now.Life is too short.It would be hard for the kids that's why you have to talk to them and make them understand why.This is a very complicated situation.Goodluck.

Answer 6

You shouldn't stay...i know i wouldn't. Your happiness is more important and if he doesn't make you happy the're is life out there. I know i went through the same thing and i left and met someone on the internet and left my family and kids which they are all grown up now and said to myself it's time for me to be happy!!...i have been with this other person now for 4 years and it's the best thing i ever done!! so good luck...go make yourself happy!!!

Answer 7

start by telling the truth. It just might be an eye opener and a refreshing way to handle things. I'm sure it will be received with an earful of truth back at ya too.Be prepared cause the truth can hurt.

Answer 8

It would be a good idea to sit down and have a good communications time with the spouse. See if you are both on the same page. Maybe it is empty nest for both of you. Maybe just need to reconnect up with the spouse.

Answer 9

Did somebody take you to the altar with a shotgun? Have some class and character and keep your vows.

Answer 10

write a note, and walk out. that's how you let everyone know. then come back to discuss the details of the divorce.