Alright, here's the deal: I've casually know this guy who I think is really hot and recently learned he would be interested in hooking up with me. I've only had sex once before, and I know how a lot of gay guys are about sex -- but I'm not really like that. I don't want to be used, but at the same time, I'm up for a good time. I don't know if there's any chance for a future w/ him but I'm guessing not. It could just be a 1 time thing or it could become a regular thing. I dunno. Basically, I just need advice. Hook up -- yea or nay?
2006-07-03 08:32:14 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Ok, first it sounds like you are already some what emotionally attached to this guy. So be careful. I would suggest talking to this guy more and ask him flat out if there is a chance that something more could come from this, if so what. Oh and don't be shy about telling him you would like more than a one time thing. I would say first take a shot of finding more tha a one time thing with him.
If he says no, then you will know the only thing that can come from it is a good sexual expereince. If you then decide to hook-up with him realize it is only casual sex and nothing more. Because you seem to already have feelings for him, having "just" casual sex with him would be very hard for you. So I would say no. It will only hurt you emotionally.
If your hormones win out and you two decide to get nekkid for one night of fun, then do yourself one last favor. DON'T KISS HIM! This will only confuse you emotionally. Good luck in finding what you want.
BTW...always play safe, use a condom
2006-07-03 08:54:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I suggest being honest with him about what YOU want, then stick to it. If you decide to have sex with him, he will be aware that all the talk about "I'm not really like that" is just bull.
If he decides that trying a relationship with you is something he would like, enjoy.
Hooking up for a one night stand is quite common with humans of all sexual orientations. Gays don't have the market in that area. It is ok if that isn't what you are looking for.
Sex is best when it is an expression of trust and love. One night stands don't have either. Just body parts doing their thing.
If you decide hooking up with this person is something you would like, enjoy, play safe
You might not know if there is any chance at a future, but you won't know if you don't tell him what you are looking for. If you give in and do the hookup right away, he will know that a relationship isn't necessary.
Remember, having sex with a person on a regular basis
2006-07-03 18:38:51 · answer #2 · answered by Dustin Lochart 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm thinking no, but that's just my personal opinion. I think that sex, which is a major step in a RELATIONSHIP, should wait until you are with that one person that you want to commit to. Most of the gay guys that I have encountered only look for sex, which to me, is a disgusting trait to portray. I want to be emotionally in touch with someone before getting "physical." You could ask this guy about a possible future, and if its promising, then you should get closer to him, not yet in a sexual way. There are other ways to be intimate without giving it all away! I think that if you through caution to the wind and just pursue a physical relationship, then afterwards, he may want nothing more to do with you. So be careful with your decision. Hope everything works out for the best!
2006-07-04 04:09:22 · answer #3 · answered by ~matthew~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nick, you don't tell us your age, nor his. Sex is serious stuff. You can be gay without being a slut. And you can enjoy sex when it's done in such a way that neither partner is abused, or "used" and when both have full respect and mutual caring for each other.
Hook up with him for a concert, coffee, or other fun activities. If it leads to a place where sex is right, you'll know. In the meantime, don't be rushed into anything just because if feels good, or worse yet, just because it'll make him like you more. Because in the long run, it won't make him like you more, and you won't feel so good, either.
2006-07-03 09:30:38 · answer #4 · answered by michael941260 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just speaking from experience, when you're sooo into the guy, it's usually a let down. The fantasy is a lot better than the reality. If you're interested in a relationship (it kind of sounds like you could be) then pursue that and see where it takes you.
2006-07-03 11:13:22 · answer #5 · answered by GA_metroman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, I did my share of hook ups before meeting my current partner. I think this relationship worked out because we took it slow. I was a couple of months before we did anything.
I think you also need to decide how bad you want a relationship or do you just want some fun.
2006-07-03 09:52:12 · answer #6 · answered by Adam 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just so long as you are openly communicating with him....when time comes to have sex...just tell him about your experience or the lack of it. But you have yet to hook up with him...how do u know whether it will work or not....making assumption right now does not help.
2006-07-03 09:23:04 · answer #7 · answered by sstooc2001 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you don't want to add fuel to the stereotype than nay. Virgins rule you blew it! well literally. Anyway, if he's really hot make out with him. If he's ONLY interested in sex then don't degrade yourself like that. Though if he's a big s-lut I wouldn't even make out with him yuck. He's probably got herpes in his mouth.
2006-07-03 08:36:47 · answer #8 · answered by dork 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea. don't feel used, use each other mutually. the goal of a hook up is to meet your needs. He's hot. do it.
then come back on here and tell us how it was.
2006-07-03 08:49:54 · answer #9 · answered by tkdeity 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll never know unless you give it a chance. I say at least meet with im!
2006-07-03 08:41:22 · answer #10 · answered by blueowlboy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋