how do u know?

Question

i have been with my bf for 5 years how do you know when its realy over and you should move on or just work on it cuz you have been though so much like the loss of you 1st little baby plz help

Answer 1

oh hon, I am so sorry about the loss of your baby.
It is a huge loss.
It will either bring you guys closer or tear you apart. The tearing apart might be for a short time or forever.
If you both want things to get better and move closer to each other then get some counseling. If you change and he doesn't, you need to realize there will be things that you either need to work on or move on from.

The pain must be a huge buredon. It will pass with time.
He may not be mature enough to know how to grieve this loss.

If you feel it is time to move on, move on. There is nothing worse than living a misserable life. Happiness at times is a choice.
There is a great book I recommend. The dance of anger. It will help whether or not your guys stay together or move on.

Answer 2

I first want to say how truly sorry I am for your loss. Children should not have to leave the earth before there parents. It's is true what they say about weather the couple gets closer than ever or rips apart. I do know for a fact that you need to go down every road and make every turn to try and keep your marriage together. But if after all that you still don't think it can survive then you can say that did every thing in your power to try and make it.
Here is a web site that might bring you some comfort. Or if nothing else let you know there are others out here in your shoes.
www.inmemoryof.com
I found the site through Krystal Ebel. You should be able to find her in there. If there is any thing else I can do please feel free to contact me by e-mail. Good luck and my prayers are with you.
Kathie Raley

Answer 3

Well Sara it's like this... When you've been together for an extremely long time feelings fade. Doctors actually found that when you first start to be intimate with someone your body excretes certain pheramones that bring you such joy. As your bodies are around each other though they begin to adapt to that and around the two year mark they start fading. This is a time in your relationship to work more on friendship and being there for each other. This is where it really becomes a relationship and not just lustful encounters. I guess the best answer to this question is when you really can see yourself without that person. You imagine yourself single constantly, not just to know what it would be like, but because you really can't stand the person you're with. Good luck sweetie!

Answer 4

Sorry for your loss but I dont quite understand what you are trying to ask here. What is making you think that its over between the two of you? why? From the information provided though, I can say that when you go through alot with someone it isnt easy to let go of them. Although ''going through things'' in general isnt always the best thing, I see it as a blessing because when you go through things WITH someone, not alone, it forms a strong bond between the two of you that you cant just find within someone else that you would meet later on down the road. It takes time and effort and its something to cherish but then again, if youve already tried to fix the relationship time and time again and are tired, maybe you should let go and atleast remain friends with him. God puts the people we are closest to and overcome hard obstacles
with in our lives, for a reason. Atleast keep him in yours.
good luck :)

Answer 5

When you experience a loss like this some couples just can't deal with it the same. And if you still love him you both may need to work on it. You should talk with your bf and see how he feels and tell him how you feel.

Answer 6

When you start asking questions like that it isn't a good sign.

When you'd rather be elsewhere or you find yourself wanting to be alone - or youstart wondering what attracted you.

Answer 7

you cant afford to invest more in a relationship than you are willing to lose. if you are asking these questions to yourself you already know what you want to do but it is hard to end a relationship. Best thing i can suggest is to Pray about it.

Answer 8

You know when the two of you have nothing left to talk about or when you do speak it turns into a shouting match.

Answer 9

i've been with my husband... well not very long.... but all i know is that if your whole heart isn't in to something... things are only going to get worse as they drag on. you havr to knoe wether or not it's just a phase or if you two have actually grown apart...i hope you figure it out.

Answer 10

when you first start questionong the relationship is the first sign......all the little signs......mood swings they all add up....and then the ultimate sign...asking if you should or shouldnt on yahoo questions.....now you know its over.