2006-07-02 18:01:43 · 19 answers · asked by spoogo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
12 answers later... Thank you for your answers. They are all very helpful. By the way, I'm a husband.
2006-07-02 18:18:59 · update #1
The only solution is for you guys to split, so that if you do you can be better as friends in that way when the kids sees you ,you won't be fighting. It is not about the hurting deeply. it is about a trauma you guys put on you children while you are together. You are both not being able to to talk this out maturely and for sure you have not come up with the solution of the problem since all what you guys do is fight and argue in front of your kids... and this so traumatic for kids even just to be hearing that their parents are fighting. howl long do you think this trauma would be with your kids Did you even think how this will affect your kid when she grows up?
If you don't want to split, you need to stop what you are doing and you should learn how you handle situations that comes in another manner than fighting...fighting will not solve anything you guys need to communicate and if still does not work you have to consider going separate ways for the sake of you kids...by being together for your kids but kid sees you fighting it is better that you separate the kid will see less arguments..and will respect you both..
2006-07-02 18:16:52 · answer #1 · answered by pinky c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to stop fighting in front of the children. Talk to your husband and tell him how you feel about all the fighting. See if he feels the same way about the kids hearing more than is good for them to hear. The fighting will effect their lives to a great extent, ask him to try with you for their sake , if not for your own, to stop the fighting when the kids are there. take it in the car, if you must. try some marriage coucelling. maybe you may need a seperation for awhile to let things become clearer to both of you. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Good luck to you.
2006-07-02 18:11:42 · answer #2 · answered by niki-niki-tembo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to take some time together without the kids around and really talk about whats going on. If all you fight that much to where the kids see, there is a problem. If that doesnt work maybe some time away from each other will help!
2006-07-02 18:07:38 · answer #3 · answered by Jessie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get counseling, and get the kids into counseling. If you and your husband learn to fight fair (yes, there is such a thing) and to solve problems calmly, you'll be helping your kids immensely. If it turns out that you and your husband divorce, at least you'll know you tried to a)keep the marriage together and b)did the right thing for your kids.
Remember that your kids take your fighting personally; counseling will provide them with another adult who can tell them that your problems are not your fault.
2006-07-02 18:15:22 · answer #4 · answered by Compulsive Reader 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you have disagreement, don't do it in front of your kids.
if there is something that is making you argue a lot, try changing that problem
example, if someone has a drinking problem, get help and quit drinking. if someone smokes, quit smoking.
ask you kids what bothers them most about you and you spouse, and try working on that problem with each other.
my ex used to drink alcohol and we would argue a lot, but we went to the decision to divorce, and we get a long a hell of a lot better, he also quit drinking and that is the main reason we did not get alone.
if you want to read the bible, you might find you answer that too.
good luck,
2006-07-02 18:10:34 · answer #5 · answered by sister cool breeze 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to marriage counseling to get help. Or maybe u guys should have sometime apart for awhile. u got to think about the kids and how they are feeling when u guys fight. u do not want them to grow up excepting crap like that when they get older or treating somebody F@#$#$ up because they seen it when they were growing up. if things can't change betwwen u guys then u may need to leave him for ur kids
2006-07-02 18:09:47 · answer #6 · answered by SEXXYDARKCHOCO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Become a proverbs 31 wife. And don't fight in front of the children. If you do that you will be amazed at the changes in your husband and your relationship.
2006-07-02 18:06:21 · answer #7 · answered by lovingdaddyof2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah I got some advice. It takes TWO to argue, DON'T !!! No matter what you do not respond and refuse to engage in any exchange of hurtful words. Instead say lets go for a walk kids or who wants ice cream? Your kids deserve to have fun in their young lives not listen to screaming and yelling. She can't fight if you won't participate...
2006-07-02 18:16:58 · answer #8 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
family counceling. I know I would have preferd that we had that growing up. My parent still fight 35 later. Hopefully I have learned from their mistake and will do better for mine. But ultimately you have to decide what is best for the kids. Breaking up maybe the only option.
2006-07-02 18:06:11 · answer #9 · answered by n l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes...be mature enough to "fight" away from the kids. Go to your room or go for a ride, or a walk. Kids don't need to hear that crap and it frightens them. How about some professional counseling?
2006-07-02 18:05:07 · answer #10 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋