My wife took my kids and moved to Ky. I will say this is the second time. We have been married for 9 yrs. She says she loves me, but can no longer stand living in Oh. I Know this is her parents doing, because they have been telling her for years to leave me and they will take care of her. I do Love her and i miss my two wonderful kids. She says if I want to be with her I have to quit my job and move to Ky. I'm afraid if I do that and it fails I will have nothing . No job no family or friends in Ky. By the way my current job pays almost 20 per hr. should i stay or go
2006-07-02 15:37:40 · 24 answers · asked by Robby 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How about searching deep within yourself for the answer. Nobody here is qualified to give you an answer that only you can find for yourself. How about seeking professional counseling or the help of a therapist. However, whatever decision you make base it on logic and not on feelings alone.....Best wishes....
2006-07-02 15:40:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your wife has done this before, then she is giving you a message that your relationship, love or not, is worth less than her desire to live in KY. The influences of her family probably is strong, stronger than her love for you.
Part of love is compromise and respect of the other person. Sounds like her needs are a priority over anything you might desire.
How hard is it to get a job in KY in your field? Can't you do a job search before you move? I don't think I would just pick up and move without solid financial plans including a job prospect. Or, take a two week vacation and check out the job market before you move.
Good luck because change is hard, especially if you are concerned as you seem to be about failing with no job, no friends, and no family support.
2006-07-02 22:45:23 · answer #2 · answered by banananose_89117 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignoring the wife part, which does sound like a gamble, I would suggest you move to be near your kids. I grew up just a few states away from my father (CO and OK), but I hardly know the man now. His 50th birthday is in a month, and I can't even tell you his favorite kind of cake.
So whether you have friends or a wife in the region, I would do anything possible to stay near your children. You only get one chance with them.
If you go, maybe you're wife will see the commitment you have and decide to find a new home with you (I'd hate the OH winters, too). Or maybe you'll hate it in KY and decide you have to move. But at least you gave your family a chance.
PS - Your wife sounds a little unbalanced to just up and move like that. It seems as if she's either just trashy, or there is some sort of abuse in the home.
2006-07-02 22:43:05 · answer #3 · answered by Kristina S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look for work in Ky - and try to make the move - in the mean time start a journal for your kids letting them know through the journal all your attempts. a job is a job man think of your family - when you go to Ky didnt live near the in laws if it does not work out or if you can't find a job in KY your kids will one day know you tried through the journal
2006-07-02 22:45:28 · answer #4 · answered by worldstiti 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LISTEN TO ME DO NOT GO TO KY I REPEAT DO NOT GO ...NOW Let me tell you why i say this.She is trying to play you.Now if she was a real woman and a real wife she never would have left.When your committed to your family you don't just up and leave you come to some kind of compromised if that doesn't work then your the man and shes supposed to ruff it out in short shes full of shi t. so just settle for sending for your kids in the summer and move on let her parents be her man.
2006-07-02 23:03:45 · answer #5 · answered by midnight red 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first try to look for a work in ky through net but dont quit your job in oh. and if you will be able to get hired be sure its a strong company or establishment. then look for a place just make sure you can afford the cost of living. after wards have your wife and kids with you. got it...
2006-07-02 22:44:16 · answer #6 · answered by helene may f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hello, Ohio girl here. My advice is, you stay right where you are. One, to go chasing her down is ridiculous. She needs to grow up, and realize that her place is with you,(assuming you dont live with YOUR parents) and that your job is a key element in the well-being of the family. She(imo) is behaving like a spoiled brat and wants to see if you will do her bidding. Children aside, her )parents are going to influence everything here, i can see that) if you go traipsing to Kentucky on her whims, who is to say how much you will see them? I would get an attorney(or pretend to) and start proceedings to make sure you have joint visitation. Let her know what you are doing. Maybe once she sees you arent her puppet, she'll be less likely to pull your strings. Good Luck and stay where you are. Play the game, man.
2006-07-02 23:01:42 · answer #7 · answered by caelestisinferno64 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey man dont move!, forget about it, Ive seen guys go through the same, they leave the good things that they have and then they get left and theyre left with nothing.
Forget it, if she loved you she wouldnt make you quit a good job and she would be with you where ever you are.
Just keep your job and be strong by your self.
With time good things will come.
2006-07-02 22:54:43 · answer #8 · answered by Tico Roots 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Secure a good job there before you go. Explain the situation to your current boss and see if he can help you out with a good word to your prospective employer. If you love your wife and kids, its the best you can do. And then, if it doesnt work out between you and your wife, you'll be employed and at least close to your kids.
2006-07-02 22:42:02 · answer #9 · answered by bakerbride2005 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your wife is truly that unhappy living in Oh...then you should at least try to find a job there and make an effort to make it work . You will never be a happy family while your wife is miserable.
2006-07-02 22:45:51 · answer #10 · answered by my two cents 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋