He said he wants a divorce. He moved to Indiana (I'm in Arkansas) I went out on my first "date" since 1988 over the week-end. How long do you date someone before having sex with them? I've always had a high sex drive and I feel really nervous about hopping into the sack too soon. SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY.
2006-07-02 12:42:57 · 26 answers · asked by carolscreation 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It sounds like he has gone on with his life so you need to do the same. I dont think there is a time limint on when you have sex. it just needs to be right for you. Sex can be a wonderful thing shared between two people and if you like the person your dating have fun with your life and enjoy yourself and if sex is part of it ,great just remember its your life and you try on new shoes before you buy them.
2006-07-02 15:35:49 · answer #1 · answered by nclonewolf1962 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I'm not sure you want to hear my answer... but here goes anyway...
I've been seperated for 2 years and I've only had 1 date since I left. He's moved on with a new live-in gf in another province (we're in Canada), and I have the young kids with me... And I realize this may not be your situation.
I would say hold off for a while yet. Yes I understand you have a high sex drive. I have 4 kids... Take the exhaustion out of the equation and you can see that I have a pretty healthy sex drive too!
One of the reasons I haven't been on many dates (other than the kids) is that I have to glue myself back together. The seperation was a frightful mess. He was abusive. I have a lot of healing to do, something that in your situation you may not have to do.
The question is there though.... Do you have any healing to do? You've not been on a first date since 88 (my last first date was in 91), so that means that you have a lot of time invested in this guy - and now he throws it back at you saying that it doesn't mean anything? Take the time that you need so that you don't end up making the same mistakes.
If you want to go on dates and have a good time and enjoy yourself, go right ahead. It's a good idea. I don't recommend putting sex back in the picture quite yet. It could end up acting like a drug in your life - something that momentarily makes you feel better or forget about things that are hurtful, but doesn't deal with the problems or the pain that you have.
If you do go out and have sex, just be very careful.
Says the cautious single mom...
2006-07-02 19:54:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on the situation. Somewhere between the third date and a month. Of course if there is no chemistry or you decide maybe this isn't the guy for you, you never get to the third date. But after spending three full dates with someone, you have a decent idea if you are compatible and you like the guy.
Another note, all rules can be bent sometimes. So if everything is go and you feel really comfortable, go for it. Oh and remember to wrap the package and have a conversation about herpes.
Good luck.
2006-07-02 19:50:53 · answer #3 · answered by c_schumacker 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long?? Are you kidding?? Till the tests come back negative. I read 1/5 adults in North America, despite all the talk about condoms and safe sex, have Herpes, the gift that keeps on giving, that nobody else wants. I read on MS Encarta that 50 % of Americans get a STD by the age of 35, not what I call "getting lucky".
Did you know muslims call us dirty Westerners, so why don't you just masturbate then???
2006-07-02 19:48:49 · answer #4 · answered by cptcanuck2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats 100% upto the people involved.
personly i'd be inclined to date at least one or two months before broaching the subject of sex and do we do it.
when the time is right you will know in your heart.
but from a guys point of view if a guy can get sex within the first month then the woman is percieved as easy and may be not right for a long term relationship.
however if your just looking for no strings sex then as and when you want to have sex that your own lifestyle choice.
only you can decide whats right for YOU.
2006-07-02 19:49:03 · answer #5 · answered by thebestnamesarealreadytaken9090 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am seperated too and i had not been gone for two weeks and my husband had sex with another woman, and he has a high sex drive as well. i honestly disagree with him about having sex so soon, because we you look at it we are still married and to me that is a form of cheating. now if you and your mate are over for good and you two both know that and have come to that decision then, i say date whoever and do whatever. but be prepared for the emotional roller coaster afterwards.
2006-07-02 19:51:17 · answer #6 · answered by lateshafinley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your a grown woman, as long as you practice safe sex, have some fun. You just ended you marriage, play the field for awhile. Some day a new love will come into your life when you least expect it.
2006-07-02 19:51:26 · answer #7 · answered by Carrie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that is something you will have to answer on your own. I would recommend that you know quite a bit about this guys sexual activities in advance. Men will tell you anything to get to their desires, so be very careful and make sure protection is used there are many things out there you could catch.
2006-07-06 08:24:43 · answer #8 · answered by usmchawkeye 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You wait until your divorce is final. You would not believe the legal paternity battle that could ensue if you accidentally got pregnant while still married to Mr. Indiana.
2006-07-02 19:47:40 · answer #9 · answered by cloud9 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have not been with a guy since 1988 oh my god .i say jump in the sack you have been single for a long time
2006-07-02 19:55:27 · answer #10 · answered by dede2772 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋