What sets off sibling rivalry?

Question

What is the main reason you or your siblings argue? What do you think influenced this? It's a subject that I want to look into, and I would like to hear some responses from you.

Answer 1

It's not a usual group situation -- with your friends, there's a certain social dynamic that goes on. There's a leader to the group, and the followers, generally. But in a family, while the oldest has been used to having more experience and (sometimes) maturity than younger siblings, one of the younger ones might have a greater tendency towards a dominating personality -- and would therefore conflict with the older ones in trying to take control. It's not a peer group because of this gap in age, experience, socialization, and maturity, many factors which contribute to the different ways that people act.

While at school you can hang out with people your age, at home you have to put up with others who either want to be your friend but aren't quite your equal (less compatible) or want to bug you because of the aforementioned problem of dominance.

The personalities may differ in interests too. While you may be (for example) incredibly popular and well-liked by your peers, your younger sibling may be less social and more comfortable with a smaller circle of friends -- at school you wouldn't normally seek out a person with your younger sibling's personality, because again, it's just not compatible with yours.

Answer 2

What sets off sibling rivalry? Goodness! That's such a wide reaching question. The psychological premise is that the older sibling resents being kicked out of the nest when a younger sibling comes along and takes over his place. That means he loses the breast, he loses the cuddling, he loses the close attention that he once had. He sees the new baby getting all these things, and it enrages him. He can't articulate this, but you can easily see it in his behaviour and his body language.
Interestingly enough, when the siblings are well spaced, sibling rivalry is minimized, if not eliminated. According to Jung's theory on the family constellation, if there is six years between children, each is raised as though s/he was an only child. And it stands to reason. At six, the older child goes off to school, his word widens and he has new friends. He is not physically in the home 24 hours a day, and doesn't see, and therefore doesn't resent, all the attention paid to the newcomer. In fact, as a result of his exalted status as big brother, he sometimes gets to play with the baby, push the stroller, teach it to do things -- all of which is ego stroking for the older sibling, and it's hard to get ticked off with someone who thinks you are wonderful and looks up to you.

Answer 3

what sets off sibling rivalry in my family is when my older sibling gets an a or gets an award in school. then my parents and teachers compare her to me and it gets very annoying and frrustrating because no one cares about me caring one bit. sometimes it just sets off a rivalry to be the best and get all of the attention. sometimes you just can't avoid it but you can always get over it if you try. it's just a fact of life that it will sometimes come along, but it doesn't have to ruin you're relationship with your sibling if you don't want it to.

Answer 4

Any number of things can set off sibling rivalry. Oldest ruling over the younger ones, arrogant older sibling, inexperienced/less educated younger sibling, jealousy, fighting for attention etc. etc.

Maybe it is because they have known eachother for so long and spend every day together.

Answer 5

Different sexes different ages.
Parents or custodial interference.
One may be good at sports the other at schoo.One may feel superior about that and demean the good student for being a nerd.
Who knows.
We are all so different and it all can NOT be layed at parents feet.
There were 3 in my family.Same parents,raised the same way and soooooo different you's think we were raised in all seperate families.
Good luck.

Answer 6

There are many different things but I have noticed that if a parent favors one child over the other then that causes problems because of jealousy between them.

Answer 7

My siblings are all drug addicts,so I have nothing to do with them. They have always been jealous of me because I have something in life worth working for.

Answer 8

Parents, I'm not sure if it's more intentional or unintentional, but siblings usually rival for parents affection and/or approval.

Answer 9

i imagine they flow o.k. jointly. Lucas Michael works nicely too, yet listed lower than are another ideas. desire this helps :) Lucas Daniel Lucas Oliver Lucas Theodore Lucas Nathaniel

Answer 10

there is no reason, theres no solution, its a natural phenomenum that cannot be avoided, and can have a solution only to a certain extent. chidren living together have fun and fights together, and thats that!