They're both 16 now.. he has hardly seen his year old baby and had walked away declaring that he didn't want to be the baby's father. Now he wants a second chance. Should she give it to him?
2006-06-30 19:52:47 · 9 answers · asked by ThatGuy 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Well. This is a hard one. I was in the same situation when my daughte was born. Her daddy didnt want to see her or let alone know her but when his mum showed a pic to him, he all of a sudden wanted contact. I said no coz he wasnt there to help me at the start and therefore he wouldn't want to help me then... But I have come to realize that my daughter needs to know her daddy and now he lives with us. We have both to the realizeation that we both still love each other just that we were young and he didnt want that hanging over his head. But now he is a dotting daddy to my 3 year old. So yeah I think she should give him a chance and see what happens.
2006-06-30 19:59:37 · answer #1 · answered by Ammie J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. He is the baby's biological father. It doesn't mean he has to have any relationship with the mother other than seeing her in the trading of child for visitation rights, but, where possible every child should know and have the opportunity to spend time with both their parents. It's not the child's fault its parents were young and found out, oops, baby on the way. Baby should know its father, and if he has chosen to be there for it, that's a good thing. Respect that, there is no tie stronger than a child to its parent. Not something to be discouraged at all.
2006-06-30 20:01:19 · answer #2 · answered by dreamcatweaver 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think yes. I know it's hard for your friend to accept him into hers+her baby's life. It also is hard to be 16 and have a baby... But think that this boy is 16 also, and probably wasn't grown up enough to take the right decision and stay with his baby and the young-mom... When he learned about her pergnancy he really didn't know what to do so he chose the easy easy way, to run away... Now, he has grown up more and he just want to make up for running away last year.. I think she shoulg give him a second chance....
2006-06-30 20:05:06 · answer #3 · answered by smaragda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends...on what type of a person he is? was there a paternity test, proving he is the father? if so, sounds like he was scared and not responsible at 15, 1 year later he is changing his tune... why...??? he thought he was responsible enough to have UNPROTECTED sex at 15 and had a child. same thing with the SINGLE mother! i am a single mother, we planned on getting married. he got funky while i was pregnant,... he is still funky.! he comes and goes out of our daughters life as he pleases. thinks being a father is gifts here and there, tells her he will do something with her and never calls or shows up. pays child support ( we are one of the lucky ones to have a dad that does!)and thinks that is his only duty. i left my childs father, i gave him a second chance- he failed both times, now he is failing to be a proper father to my daughter,she gets hurt by his actions. she does not understand why he does what he does to her. BUT I DO. now i must decide, is my childs father the type of father, that is a good role model? think long term... children learn good things and bad things from fathers, if its a girl, they model potential boyfriends, husbands after the father of male role model in thier childhood years & into adult lives. if its a boy, boys look up to their dads, hard worker, how dad treats women, drink, play, sports etc.. if the childs father treats mom bad, they, being male or female will learn in the future growing up around it, to emulate it right into their own relationships. some guys have that father thing down... others do not. the moms decision should be to take control of the matter, TALK FIRST lay down exactly what she exspects from the dad. see if he can do all she asks. do not let him into her life unless time shows he is a capable father, because . what if she lets him back, and he walks yet again? the child maybe older, but children feel & understand far more than you think. does this father pay anything? is he responsible in that aspect? at 16, what kind of a job if any ! can help support a child? tell your friend to THINK about letting the childs father into the CHILDS LIFE and not hers! BIG DIFFERENCE. He WALKED out of both of their lives BEFORE. has he grown up in a years time? what type of chance does the father want? does he drink, party, do drugs? does he have his own parents support to back him up, guidence, finacial, love ??? is this guilt talking? if he is a schmuck. file for suprovised custody time, get some help with raising this child, no doubt the mom lives with a parent/ parents. have him walk in the moms shoes for a day, feeding, bathing , diapers, doctors visits, nap time, bedtime, play, interaction, and see how the daddy faces this new chapter in his life! see if he walks away declaring he doesnt want to be the babies father! AGAIN ... & what kind of poop reaction is that! denial! bottom line, 16 years old, a child, thats alot of responsibility, why add pressure from a dad who cant really make up his mind? lay down the conditions, pass or fail... tell mom to concentrate on herself, child, school and providing some stabilty for that baby. think about being single, let the dad be in the childs life (NOT MOMS life) IF he can handle it, if not, child support, have the child grow up around a positive male role model , grandpa, uncle, whoever and keep the child in a stable home environment. in a years time he hasnt been there, dont make the same mistake like i did, they say they can change , they usually cant and only time will tell. elizabeth
2006-06-30 21:01:48 · answer #4 · answered by elizabeth 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO when it comes to your child, he does not deserve a second chance. He had a chance to be a father to his child and he chose to throw it away.
2006-06-30 23:53:25 · answer #5 · answered by samkat1972 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she should...because everybody makes mistakes...Im not sayin what he did is made a mistake but he is finally stepping up to the plate...so if he wasn't to that even tho he should've did it all along i would tell him to go right ahead cuz that's his child and he should be their for it ALL THE TIME!!!
2006-07-01 00:58:44 · answer #6 · answered by sexielyse0604 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES BCUZ EVERY1 DESERVES A SECOND CHANCE AND AFTER ALL HE IS THE BABY'S FATHER HE WANTS TO DO RIGHT NOW WHEN HE WASN'T TRYING TO DO RIGHT YA'LL WERE UNHAPPY NOW DAT HE IS YA'LL R STILL UNHAPPY U CAN'T HAVE UR CAKE AND ICE CREAM 2
2006-06-30 19:57:39 · answer #7 · answered by QueenT 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The daddy should be allowed to see his child .
2006-07-06 07:34:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course his the father
2006-07-01 00:39:15 · answer #9 · answered by Smiley17 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋