I am 21, young white male actor with a 9-5, recoving from a one year plus relationship. I just want any advice as to how to recover, regain confidence, and get on with life advice that anyone can give. Male female, no difference, I would love to get some feedback!
Thank you for reading, and all the best to you.
2006-06-30 13:17:34 · 4 answers · asked by lance perkins 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I agree with Justme completely. (Can't read cherod and johnny's advice, well, that wouldn't work for any, uh, everyone.)
You are quite young, and your heart will heal faster than you can imagine. That's what young people should be doing, falling in love over and over, until they find The One. Just be careful of desperate promiscuity (a problem even among 50-year-old divorcees), which feels at the time like having fun, and later like a crazy attempt to feel desirable.
Oh, to be young, single and in New York!! I'm so jealo . . . wait a minute! Been there, done that, and it was tough. But I came though it with a smile on my face, and so will you. Best luck and great happiness to you.
2006-07-05 13:35:23 · answer #1 · answered by LazlaHollyfeld 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, this may seem tired and all-too-cliche, but "To thine own self be true..." is a timeless, heuristic value to "fall back on" when "in doubt." You may want to ask yourself about your "motivational attributes" and the other factors of 'causality' that have brought you to your present state, i.e., the efficient ('standards' & 'measures'), the material possessions (obsessions?), and the formal - conceptual underpinnings which surround or the sum total of your "rationality." Make no mistake about it, change and/or growth depends on -yea, DEMANDS - "self-assessment" if you're really serious about NOT repeating "old patterns" that don't work for you... this means taking some stock of behaviors held as "suspect" or "with reserve" by your friends, family, and "countrymen." It means becoming more intimately & honestly connected to your unique "person-space." This notion points to a series of social skills - interpersonal & intrapersonal - along with your other "indicies of development"... in other words, your BOUNDEDNESS. Moreover, your actual willingness to remediate the areas that are the real & present "problem makers," is an essential awareness: you must ask yourself, "Am I my own worst enemy?" -Most of us ARE ! (Our own worst enemies, that is.) Just how honest can you get about all this with yourself? It's easier said than done. - Bad habits are hard to break, especially if you like them or they give you great "temporal" pleasure. REMEMBER: The "Pleasure Principle" is alive and well in all of us... we are, by our most base of instincts, pleasure-based... even if those "pleasures" are abberent or even self-destructive. Being yourself is one thing, making others feel uncomfortable is another. I'm "shooting in the dark" here so I can't be certain any of this applies to your needs. However, taking a "step back" and seeing yourself as an "actor on a stage" is the best thing a person can to do to transcend "the difficulties" - at ANY point in "spacetime." Can you see your own "inflations" and possible "deteriorizations" in the normative landscape that allows you to more accurately pinpoint and affirm the existence of any "problematic" neuroses or psychoses... That's all I can offer for now unless you are willing to delve into some suggested readings & websites. You know my "handle" if you so choose to seek my further recommendations.
2006-06-30 14:17:09 · answer #2 · answered by cherodman4u 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I will give you the same advice I would give any straight person. because I think the rules are the same after a break up no matter who you are. get back out there. Don't jump into anything right away but go out and have fun. Reconnect with old friends if you have left them behind. If you don't have a lot of friends get involved with some things outside of work that will help you make some. Volunteer work is always good for this. At least for me it is. Good luck to you. Breaking up is hard to do.
2006-06-30 13:31:00 · answer #3 · answered by Justme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seriously, for balance read your Bible everyday, and pray.
I Corinthians 13;8a, Love never fails!!!!!
2006-06-30 13:33:51 · answer #4 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋