2006-06-30 11:05:34 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
My girlfriend is in Iraq right now, she has a little daugther, and I have 2 boys, her home town is on the north east side of the states and I live in the south east, well she wants to married me but she said that i have to move to her home town because she wants her daugther to be close to her dad, but if I move down there I will be to far from my kids, so I don't want to lose her or my kids. Would you please give me some advises, thank you
2006-06-30 11:13:57 · update #1
Perhaps you need to compromise. Each can move an equal driving distance if possible. Other things to consider are if you have custody or not and how often do you see your boys and how often her ex sees her daughter. I think it would be very wise for all parties involved (even the other parents) sit down and have a talk about a fair solution. You never know who is willing to compromise once everyone has met each other. If all else fails you could wait a few years until the children get older.
I think that it is a good idea that you are discussing this now, before things get really complicated. Also something else to think about, how do you each get along with the other's kids? How do the kids feel about the situation? With this type of descision, everyone should have a say in the matter. Keep your head up and remain open and I am sure that a viable solution can be found.
Blessings
2006-06-30 11:31:00 · answer #1 · answered by Glynis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you two live in such different locations, how are you at the point of getting married, anyway?
Her reasons for not wanting to move are highly valid and important. She's putting raising her child and what's best for him/her first -- which she should. She's already raising a child of divorce -- at least allowing the child to have both parents working cooperatively is a very good thing -- not to mention trying to take the child away from that locale COULD result in another bitter court battle.
You have the self-same reasons for not wanting to move -- because it would take you away from YOUR children. Exact same situation. If YOU aren't willing to do it -- in the exact same situation -- how can you expect or demand that she do it? And unfortunately, I dont' see a clear solution to this one. She has, in fact, told you that she would marry you BUT (conditional) this is where she lives -- period. She's been open and honest and put her cards on the table -- and put the ball back in your court. In this negotiation, she's just given you a deal breaker. Next move is yours, and you have to decide - but her leaving her town is not on the table for negotiation.
2006-06-30 11:44:50 · answer #2 · answered by Shadycat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sure, i'd enable them flow. in case you comprehend that he will safeguard them and he will preserve them, then by utilizing all potential enable them flow and characteristic a strong time. it delivers you with and your boyfriend a danger to be jointly even as they are lengthy gone. that is going to do all of you some strong. It sounds like your ex and his female friend are going to be everlasting, it really is an danger on your children to get to entice close her better. i'm certain issues will be fantastic.
2016-10-14 00:24:19 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is staying for the kids.... But you need to also think about yours!
2006-06-30 11:16:22 · answer #4 · answered by Sheila 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love her. She isn't staying for her ex-husband, she is staying for her KID!!!! she is doing what's right!
2006-06-30 11:09:03 · answer #5 · answered by ♥♥Soon to Be Mrs.F♥♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your kids come first dude!...If this woman doesn't want to leave her kids then why should you leave yours...something is wrong!
2006-06-30 11:27:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yessssss
2006-06-30 11:10:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋