What is wrong with me?

Question

One on one and with close friends and chatting on line,im brilliant!!people say im funny and smart,but once i get into a crowd i turn into a jibbering idiot,i usually stand around and say nothing,and people think im stuck up,or i say something inane and poeple think im stupid!Then when i get home and think about all the great things i could have said i feel like such a moron i want to bang my head against the wall.
what is wrong with me?!!!does anyone else have this problem?

Answer 1

YOU HAVE COMPANION YOU DONT AWARE AN ENEMY OR NEGATIVE THINKER AND DONT BELIEVE YOU TRULLY.WATCH OUT BABE!HE/SHE MIGHT DESTROY YOU!IN DIFFERENT ANGLE OR ASPECTS!MAYBE?!

Answer 2

this happens normally and to an extent yes its been a similar case that i go through. that happens due to your anxiety. this syndrome happens while we know abt a topic but we wont tell unless we receive an assurance within the group members. say for instance the subject topic fancies around "what is your favorite dish?". while we may have our personal statements, we cringe to tell it on the face thinking like - "what kind of reaction i might get etc.?". whereas if we receive similar answers from the group members, we also pitch in with our contribution-

Sometimes we tend to talk first and then react; something like bite into that Cheese Burger from Hardees first and then remedify by a tough cardio session. but remember its all a process which every1 has to go through. take it one day at a time since there might not be one straight solution to such occurences. for further help i strongly recommend reading Edward de Bono's titled "How To be More Interesting".

Answer 3

Are you a model? Then this might be the result of over-work. In case you work less, then you while alone, analyse what goes wrong when you speak in front of a crowd. In case this happens again, you do not speak promptly, just wait recheck what you're speakin' and let me know. Don't reply to people instantly. Just take your time and possibly speak less. If you think then, you'd give great replies to people. I also had the same problem and got over it by practicing this!
By the way, my e-mail is [e-mail]. In case you need more help!

Answer 4

I grew up in a very small town, with a limited number of kids to be friends with. as such, now when I'm in a very large group of people I tend to be overwhelmed by the choices.

what tends to work for me is to break the large group up into smaller subsections (based on either location within the party, or on personality types if they are people I know), an then just pick which subsection I wish to be a part of, for however long I wish. if it's a meet-and-greet type party, I can just move from subsection to subsection, blessing each one with my presence! LOL

Answer 5

You've just got a version of 'stage fright.'
When you're around people you know, you feel confident that you will be interpreted correctly and thus feel free to say what you feel.
Around others, you don't know how they'll interpret your behaviour (they might think you're aloof or stuck up) and thus you're more cautious with what you say and when you say it.
So, take a look at your friends/family and what do you see? Smart, good-hearted, thinking people that "get it" (i.e. get you), I would guess. If you can impress them, you can impress your 'target' audience. In other words, the folks that "get" you will come to you, those that don't you don't need to concern yourself with, 'cause they're not appropriate for your world.
Trust yourself, free your inner self and have confidence in that, and it won't matter how many people are around, 'cause your only "playing" to your friends or future friends. The rest of them won't ever 'get' it, so let go of worrying about their interpretation of your behaviour and you won't lose yourself in nervousness.

Answer 6

I hear ya. I am that way also. I avoid places and that is not the right thing to do. I turn down wedding invations, birthday parties. I believe it is SAD. (social anxiety disorder). I have more online friends than local friends. I drink when I have to be somewhere. Providing that is ok to be drinking at the event. I am social then. I can't even talk to people in real life even when it is one on one conversation. Especially when we are driving somewhere. Maybe talk about things in the local paper, what you see on the news. But be yourself I guess. It is easier said than done I know. I can't give sound advice when I suffer myself. Good luck to you though.

Answer 7

Dearest it sounds like you are an introvert more then an extrovert and that your shy and timid whenever subjected to multiple people. You are probably very kind hearted, and a gentle person. Dont let others make you feel so low. You have the righ ideas and with time then you will be able to express your inner emotions and feelings outward. I wish you the best of luck !

Answer 8

well, yes I can definetly relate to your experience. I usually get kind of nervous around people whom I just met or don't know very well and therefore I don't speak much, thus people think I am very serious or stuck up as well when that is not the case because my close friends know I am quite the opposite. I think it's a question of having confidence in yourself and being able to speak so as to keep people interested. I have met many people who are able to carry out very interesting conversations and are great story tellers. However, I met people who just talk and talk and all they said is very stupid things. So I think that people like you and me just have to work on having confidence in ourselves and in our words so as to be able to say what you are thinking and to carry out inteligent and interesting conversations with others. Hope this helps.

Answer 9

You are just sort of shy in crowds. Just try not to worry about it to much. Worrying is part of the problem. Believe it or not, one of the answers saying "you need some more tequila" is one of the answers that hit close to the heart of the problem. You just need to loosen up and relax. You should get into the crowds more often but stop worrying about your social performance as much and just let yourself "go with the flow". It will come with experience. You just have to get used to it.

Answer 10

there's nothing wrong with you... it happens to be too... when I'm with close friends I'm fine, or one on one... but the minute I get into a crowd I feel weird and have no idea what to say... so I shut up.. or else I make an utter foul of myself... it's just until you get to know the people, you can't expect yourself to be great in all situations. It's just a matter of intimacy with the people around you! Relax!

Answer 11

Dont worry you just aint comfortable around a group of people face to face. Millions have this problem. Just try to remember to think before you talk. Thats why you are so " smart funny etc. when you write because you have to think first. By the way damn you're hot.