well my husband gets mad at me if i go on line, so i have to wait till he goes to bed, and he gets mad when my kids are not doing what he wants, so we fight all the time, we use to get alone when we 1st got together, now i hate to wake up.
2006-06-29 17:11:27 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sounds like a tough situation. probably for you, your husband and the kids, you may want to seek some counseling to help out. please look somewhere beyond the internet. find someone local who is a professional marriage counselor.
2006-06-29 17:14:04 · answer #1 · answered by more than a hat rack 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The majority of the time it is the wife who keeps peace in the home. U should have a talk with ur family ( husband and kids) and together come up with a solution on how 2 have a good home life. It will take the whole family 2 pitch in and do their part .
2006-06-30 00:21:33 · answer #2 · answered by India 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like it's time for some marriage counseling. Try talking to him when he's in a good mood. Tell him that you need to speak to him seriously but you can't do it if he's always getting angry. If he refuses, then you need to start getting help for yourself. I had a similar experience with my husband. Hated when I was on line, but he wasn't giving me attention, so what else was there to do.
Well, long story short, he used this as one of the excuses for cheating on me. I've gone to counseling for myself and realized that there is nothing wrong with me. I also have children, one of which is full grown already and one that is 13. For your children's sake, please get help, and if nothing gets resolved you need to make a move, if not for yourself for the sanity of your children. They don't deserve that. Talk with your kids, ask them how they feel. You'd be surprised at the response.
My husband is an alcoholic and it has so much to do with his moods and poor decisions. At this point, I just feel sorry for him. You need to start working on yourself. Don't let too much time go by. I did, and now I find it harder than ever to make the change. But I'm working on it. 24 years into this marriage and now that I look back, should've ended a long time ago. Don't let this happen to you.
Don't lose yourself. Good luck.
2006-06-30 00:19:30 · answer #3 · answered by BluePassion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's insecure hun, just like women can be, men can be as well.. he's scared of what he doesnt understand, and from the little bit you've written he seems like he likes to be in control..and he doesnt like what he cant control.. hating to wake up.. been there, the depression is settling in, u dont want to get up cause you just feel its easier to sleep then deal with what mood he may be in today..
Try to talk to him, try to tell him how your feeling, how sick its making you.. (the depression) if he cares about you he'd want to help you, just a guess but it seems your lacking in communication and compromise in your marriage..and the communication u are doing isnt healthy communication..
Try to talk, if that doesnt help, suggest counseling, but if he is a control freak he'll think he's to "with it" to need it although he does cause he has the makings for a unhealthy relationship. So when all that fails.. You find the strength to stand up and fight for what you need, what your kids need, and if that means telling him to walk, then maybe that will get him to reconsider his controling ways if you take the control completely away from him.. If its so bad that your stomach is tying up in knots not knowing what kind of mood he's going to be in today.. then its time to do what is right for your kids, and that means you need to be strong, and demand the mutal respect that is rightfully yours..and settle for nothing less.. You deserve a happy healthy life and so do your kids..and if your husband really loves you and his family, he'll realize that he better change or risk losing all of you..
Chin up, and dont forget who you are, and what you deserve.. you only live once, dont waste your's and your childrens lives on depression.. and remember marriage is about give and take, so if he is willing to compromise, listen to his needs as well.. Good luck
2006-06-30 00:30:12 · answer #4 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well Im not married so Im probably not an expert but I do kno that If you dont have peace in your home when you wake up in the morning then somethin in your household has to change...and why should you wait for him to go to bed your a grown a** woman and your probaly to young to be stressin so I would just sit him down and calmly tell him how I feel the worst he could do is not listen....Good Luck
2006-06-30 00:18:13 · answer #5 · answered by Lady_6 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been married? Do you work outside the house? It appears that he is trying to control you and your kids. May be he is afraid that he is losing control of his life. If possible, your husband and yourself make time for yourselves. If you have your parents, siblings, or in-laws live near by, may be they can babysit for you while your guys go out. Most of married couple forget to take time out for themselves once they get kids. Also, do your guys talk? That's another married couples forget to do...talk. I am not talking about daily life, kids, or gossips. When you are out together, you may want to talk to him about how things are going in your life. Don't forget to ask him what is going on with his life. Communication (not arguing) is important. If he starts to argue, tell him you will talk to him when he can TALK to you. It may take a while to get him to open up, but you have to try.
2006-06-30 09:33:58 · answer #6 · answered by Janis P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He seems like he could be abusive if it got too serious. If I were you, I would leave him for a few weeks to see how things go. Then talk it over with him and see how he feels without you. But you do not need to put up with that. That is ridiculous. If you like that kind of love, if there is any love at all, then good for you.
2006-06-30 00:15:24 · answer #7 · answered by ladia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to him.communicating w/ the person concern is the best thing to do so that it won't get worst.perhaps,he needs a hand for comfort right now.he might have problems that he only kept to himself.try to reach out to him.this is marriage.whatever happens,don't give up too easily.we utterred our vows and we're supposed to keep it,aren't we?there's too much apprehensions on you.get rid of it. you need to face this w/ courage. think of the future of your family. do not follow what others do (DIVORCE). it's not the solution to our problems in marriage. everything happens for a purpose and we encounter obstacles so that we can learn and we can grow into a better person..
2006-06-30 00:43:43 · answer #8 · answered by sweetsexything 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seek solace in legion.
speak to somebody qualified with family issues
and no. Dr. Phil is not.
what you need is a qualified psychiatrist to help... it's called marriage counseling.
it'll help.
I wish there was more I could do!
2006-06-30 00:15:37 · answer #9 · answered by The greatest and the best. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You suggest counseling to him by saying honey we used to be so happy and this is just breaking my heart,, will you go with me to counseling so we can find our happy again?
If the answer is no, then go yourself. Your children deserve one happy parent at least.
2006-06-30 00:15:16 · answer #10 · answered by yeller 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋