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My mother has a problem. she always have to have a man in her life and has always put them before her children. Now she is on her third marriage in her 40s, and unhappy. My problem is that she always calls me crying about their issues. I have helped her many times in these issues before and this last time just really took the cake. I love her , but I can not stand to be in her life if she continues to keep going tin the same circle of mess ups with men.

2006-06-29 14:57:41 · 17 answers · asked by Busy "T" 1 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

17 answers

i Havent talked to my mom in 7yrs,

2006-06-29 14:59:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

What you need to do is go to see her and sit her down and just tell her that until she has her live straightend up and her problems all solved, you would rather not be involved. Explain that you love her but just cant handle all the stress right now with trying to cope with your own affairs. Once you tell her stick to your word, dont talk about her problems when she calls, just change the subject and she will get the message you mean biz

2006-06-29 15:06:10 · answer #2 · answered by Texas_at_its_best 4 · 0 0

Toxic Parents : Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life by Susan Forward, Craig Buck

2006-06-29 15:01:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Personaly my mom treats me like crap, and I know what you mean when shes going through her problems. I love my mom, but for me latly its hard to do that. I feel like I have to be her sholder to lean on, and you must feel the same way. You really need to tell her that you have your own issues to worry about, and though you do love her and want to support her, hearing all of her problems over and over are really causing you alot of greif and stress. Tell her she should try new things and get out more, make some more friends, etc. Good luck.

2006-06-29 15:01:48 · answer #4 · answered by 5 · 0 0

Tell her that you just don't want to hear about it any more. That's what I did with my mom and her "crying all night on the phone". Before she can get it out say, "No. Please. I love you very much but I really can't hear this right now. I have helped you before now it is your turn to help yourself. For Gods sake! Your a WOMAN! Let the world know!"

2006-06-29 15:04:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

i became followed and that i imagine what you probably did became out of line. As i discussed on yet another submit you made, I truly have reunited with my bmom or perhaps besides the undeniable fact that there are circumstances of "pulling back" I consistently finally end up chatting with her. contained in the initiating i did not totally opt for to a reunion because I felt accountable about how my amom would sense and concept my afamily will be damage. when I did verify with my afamily about this, i got here across out how incorrect i became. They inspired the reunion and certain me that I could no longer sense any guilt about wanting to do this. Who is popular with what reaction your daughter would are starting to be from her aparents if she were given the prospect to carry this topic up on her own, which she would have in time. If my bmom would have contacted my afamily earlier I had a danger to inform them i'd be very upset because it really is MY company. same on your daughter telling her afamily became her company, and under no circumstances yours. you're a stranger to them, yet you've their variety and are calling them? that's scary and that i'm certain the amom became stunned and probably freaked out. Being freaked out would not condone yelling at you, yet you lacking your daughter would not condone leaping the gun and contacting her amom. i assistance you to deliver your daughter an appology and enable her contact you from there.

2016-10-13 23:33:01 · answer #6 · answered by muniz 4 · 0 0

Tell her how you feel and be honest about it. You can be supportive and loving of her without dealing with her vicious cycle. She needs to know where you stand and that you are tired of seeing her repeat the same mistake over and over again. Urge her to get into counseling so maybe she can resolve this issue.

2006-06-29 15:00:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I have always had my mother near. She retired & moved away a year ago & I speak to her every day & she has been to see me about 6 tomes & i have been to visit her once, I have a great relationship with both my parents & thank God so does my husband. They adore him. Sometimes people would say he is their child too.

2006-06-29 15:01:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

My mom is the same way and i don't think there is anything you can say that will help her when she is ready to live her life for herself instead of men it will have to be up to her. just listen to her problems when she wants to talk about it but don't give advise just listen. thats all she wants is someone to listen to her

2006-06-29 15:05:14 · answer #9 · answered by casandra m 2 · 0 0

you have to just listen and also tune out your feelings about her problem, my mother is depending on me to have her back everytime her and her crazy boyfriend go through things. I love her enough to put my feelings aside, even though I hate her boyfriend with everything in me. Just remember she needs you more than she needs him and sometimes you will need her too. We get one mother and once she is gone you can't get her back.

2006-06-30 05:42:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I am really surprised to be reading this. You almost perfectly explained MY mother.

Eventually she quit talking about it, but you have to know my mother.. She's an odd-ball.. Runs in the family.

I talk to her as much as possible though...

2006-06-29 15:00:30 · answer #11 · answered by Jareth 3 · 0 0

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