I have been married for 12 years me and my husband was seperated when I started dating someone else for almost a year.I had sex with the boy friend one week before me and my husband got back together. With in a month of being back togheter I found out I was pregnanent .We have never had a blood test to determin who is the bio father. In the past my daughter had heard us fighting about the situation. My husband love's him but offten uses this to hurt me.
2006-06-29 11:22:48 · 35 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If you want to tell him dont you think you had better find out the truth first?
2006-06-29 11:26:07 · answer #1 · answered by Angelcake 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You don't. You get the blood test done (the child doesn't need to know what it's for) and you get the answer. If your husband is the biological father, then there is nothing more to argue about. If he is not the biological father, then you can finally get it out in the open between you two, discuss it, and find some resolution so that there doesn't need to be any more arguing about it. Only tell your son if it is determined that he is not your husband's biological child - until then, there's no point in upsetting him over something that you don't even know is the case or not.
2006-06-29 11:29:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your husband truly loved your son, he would never say anything to hurt you or your son. It's obvious you both need to know who the biological father really is, but there is no reason at this point to tell your son. Take the test and after the results determine were your relationship goes from there and if the other man is the father, he may want the privilege of being in your son's life.
2006-06-29 11:33:03 · answer #3 · answered by SinSin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to find out for sure before you tell him. Finding out will also end the fighting between you and your husband on this issue because it will be a known fact one way or the other. Regardless of biology though your husband is still your sons father and always will be. Being a father is about a lot more than biology.
2006-06-29 11:30:56 · answer #4 · answered by rkrell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before this goes any further make VERY, VERY sure that child is not your husband's... And even if the he is not, does it really matter who the biological father is? Your husband obviously loves that child and has provided for him, that's what should really matter. Anyone can be a sperm donor...but not everyone can be a good loving father... I think you're all making a big deal of not such a big deal. Moreover, your child is too young to be dealing with such trauma at such an early age. I take my hat off to your husband for being a real man....for supporting and loving a child who might not even be his... THAT'S A REAL MAN!
2006-06-29 11:36:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First I would determine who the father is! Then only if it became absolutely necessary tell him, but I would wait until he is as old as possible so he will have a better chance at understanding. Wouldn't your husband feel awful if it turned out that he was his biological son and he had held this child in contempt all these years for nothing?
2006-06-29 11:29:10 · answer #6 · answered by KO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the paternity test first before anyones feelings gets hurt anymore. Explain the difference between a bio father and Daddy. He will appreciate your honesty as he gets older.
2006-06-29 11:25:18 · answer #7 · answered by metismaiden 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as no one know where's the truth ..just leave every thing at it's situation ..but i prefer to make the blood test ,maybe ur husband is his father and if not,u must to tell ur son cuz he is gonna to know the truth one day and it's better to know it now because he have nobody else but you now and he will not leave u , but 1st u must to make him understand that the real father who is love him and who cared of him and who will be always here 4 him......and maybe u have to talk with ur husband so slowly and tell him that u don't like him to talk about these cuz as well as it really hurt u it could hurt the kid too and make him thought that he hate him......but whatever is the truth ur son will know it oneday ....so make the test blood....good luck
2006-06-29 11:37:33 · answer #8 · answered by batt00ta 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your son is way too young to handle this at the moment. wait till he turns atleast 12 and then break it to him. make sure your husband is with you when you tell him so he knows its okay. Perhaps it will stop your husband from hurting you. Be honest and be clear. I am sure he will understand. God Speed
2006-06-29 11:36:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off you should have your A$$ busted for fooling him to begin with.Tell him the truth & tell him that sometimes adults do very ignorant things.The other possible father should know to & get a blood test damn it.What the hell is wrong with people today?!
2006-06-29 11:27:23 · answer #10 · answered by Troy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have the test done before I say anything if I were you. And if it comes back that your husband isn't the father, you say, "name, so and so isn't your father, but he's your daddy." There's a difference. Any man can be a father, but a real man can be a daddy.
2006-06-29 11:26:13 · answer #11 · answered by Jennifer N 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋