I am married to this man. we seperated soon after cause he had a change of heart. its almost been a year and i still have hopes of things working out.. should i try?
2006-06-29 08:57:22 · 20 answers · asked by A$#!ey 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well, you know that I have been through a lot with men....
and I think that if he is showing promising signs that he wants to make things work...that you should gently steer him in that direction.
Cook for him when he doesn't expect it. :)
2006-06-29 09:02:37 · answer #1 · answered by ShineOnYouCrazyDiamond 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you don't mind being constantly disappointed then you should stay.
while I take marriage seriously and believe that too many people flit from marriage to marriage as if it is the best way to "go steady" if this guy is telling you that he doesn't love you or feel about you the same way: Get out and save yourself your dignity.
Imagine this: what if there is someone out there who really does feel the same way towards you that you feel towards him? what if when you meet this person you laugh at the thought of your current situation?
maybe you won't meet this person for awhile and in that time you develop a new hobby, a new career, new friends. You learn that you would rather be alone than ever sacrifice yourself for a person that doesn't even love you. (but being alone is pretty terrific since you are this amazing person with a long list of interests and talents)
When you are out ... watch old people and how they treat each other. Do they tolerate each other or are they genuinely happy to be with one another, do they talk and hold hands? Which couple do you want to be? WHich couple would you be if you stayed in your current situation?
I wish you the best.
2006-06-29 09:09:58 · answer #2 · answered by artful dodger 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same boat as you, she loves me but isn't "in love" with me. We've been separated for about a year and I still have hopes of her realizing love is enough for a marriage for two people that want to be married. I guess I just realize that you don't constantly need to be in love to make a marriage work, or that it is impossible to always feel in love with someone and she doesn't realize this. So, I am holding out for now but if someone else comes along, I'm open to interpretation.
2006-06-29 09:51:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll just be fooling yourself if that happens. He won't be happy because he is not in love with you and you won't be happy because he's not loving you back. There's no way that could work love is not one sided. If he married you and had a change of heart and hurt you why would you do this to yourself? You deserve someone who really loves you and you'll find him because if there's no fuel to the fire it fizzles out, you will get over this guy.
2006-06-29 09:03:46 · answer #4 · answered by honey27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would u even consider that? You deserve better than that. Why do women think so little of themselves to want a man that does not want them? Find someone that will love u back. If u try to do it with that guy u will not be happy and he will cheat on u!! You must have self esteem issues to clear up before you have a relationship. Please do that before you pursue a relationship.
2006-06-29 09:04:40 · answer #5 · answered by CHAEI 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is admirable to try to make a thing work but if the person does not share your enthusiasm let it go. Learn from your mistakes and just make better choices next time and take your time with your next relationship. Good luck and enjoy being single for a bit. Good luck.
2006-06-29 09:03:45 · answer #6 · answered by D baby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should continue trying a while. If you really love that person, show him/her your feelings. But if after, that little period of time you don´t see any change, you should leave him/her go, and try to get some other occupations. You should also, have a time for vacations and take really good care of yourself.Don´t get depressed if that persons doesn´t notice you´re in love. Maybe it´s because he/she doesn´t deserve you and your good feelings towards him/her.Think about your hapiness first.
2006-06-29 09:11:17 · answer #7 · answered by carolinefec 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here is a little quote from "Moulin Rouge"
"The greatest thing you will ever learn,
is to love and be loved in return"
That sums it up. Don't waste your time...find someone new who will love and worship you. In the end you will be happier. Otherwise in a couple years you will feel burnt out and empty.
2006-06-29 09:07:01 · answer #8 · answered by Confuscious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its sad to say but MOVE ON. You are not going to change him. If he left you, you have to think why he had a change of heart. Is he hiding something from you that might be the reason?
2006-06-29 09:02:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have created a fantasy world around him sugar,,,
It's time for you to move on and forget what happened,, grieve it and let it go. If after all this time he is not making a move toward you, its over.
2006-06-29 09:00:20 · answer #10 · answered by yeller 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋