i am 18 about to be 19 and engaged to be married and i just forund out that i was pregnant. my fiance is 21 and doesnt know yet i know he wont be mad he will be happy cause we were going to have a baby after the wedding. i need to know some ways to tell him. and what do i do now i dont know much about pregnancy and i cant go to my mother about this cause she doesnt want to be a part of my life anymore.
2006-06-29 08:12:58 · 29 answers · asked by ashley s 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
If you know your boyfriend will be happy, you should be happy when you tell him. You could take him out to dinner or make him dinner or something like that. It's very important news so you need to find a place you can tell him where he's not distracted (like in front of the tv or at work or when he's w/his friends). You should tell him in a way that opens up a discussion. If you can joke w/him, you could say something about maybe wanting to get married a little sooner! Don't say that if he won't think it's funny.
The most important thing is that you two get together on your having a healthy pregnancy, child, and relationship.
If you don't have a gynecologist, ask your friends who they go to. If you don't have anyone to ask, you could go to a Pregnancy Care Center (NOT Planned Parenthood)-check the phone book-or you could ask around at church or school or work. You don't have to tell anyone you're pregnant. Just say you're looking for a good OB/GYN and who do people recommend? Some OB/GYNs won't take new patients at certain times of the year but, if you live in a smaller community, you probably won't have this issue. Plus, some will take new patients who are pregnant. You'll just have to tell them your situation.
Make sure you tell your doctor that you don't really know what you're doing and you need all the help you can get. The nurses in OB offices LOVE to help-they have SO much information-so don't be shy. You can also check into your local hospital for pregnancy classes and birthing classes to help you prepare.
"What to Expect When You're Expecting" by Arlene Eisenberg gives you a month-by-month guide to being pregnant from everything from morning sickness to swollen feet to proper nutrition to baby's size at each month. It's really cool and VERY helpful.
And, you know, maybe if you really want things to change w/your mom, having her grandchild might be the key to healing your relationship.
Always glad to help! God bless you and your new baby!
2006-06-29 08:27:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Firstly congratulations! :D There are many ways that you could tell your fiance that you are pregnant but dropping little but affective hints. E.G Maybe a pregnancy rapper in the bin, A Baby Book, Or just start talking about babies when he is around.
You said that he would be happy that you are going to have a baby, So maybe sit him down for a nice meal and just tell him that your pregnant.
With your issue with not knowing much about pregnancy, Your not all alone. Nearly everybody in there first pregnancy doesn't really know much. But you can get a lot of help and advice from your doctor, Internet and baby books. As you are not in contact with your mother anymore, What about talking to your finance Mother? I'm sure she will be over the moon to help you!
2006-06-29 15:21:52 · answer #2 · answered by Alex E 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations! First of all, tell the father of the baby - just be honest and come right out and share your excitement about being a mother, and that you're so happy that you will be a family - even though it wasn't what you expected. A baby is a gift. There are many places to educate yourself about pregnancy - start with your doctor - they are amazing and can give you all kinds of info. Go to the library, but don't get scared off by all the information. Realize that the majority of pregnancies and births are totally normal, and you'll be fine. Also, you should be resolving your problems with your mother - you will need her and she needs you, too. Don't be immature any more - you will be a mother and a wife and need to grow up really quickly. Family is forever, and you have a lot going on to share with them.
2006-06-29 15:20:12 · answer #3 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, I'm sorry that you're mom is choosing to be this way, try not to let that issue cloud this one too much, but don't close the door on her...she obviously has her issues going on and maybe your having a baby is something that will change her.
As for telling your future hubby...I think he's going to be estatic. How to tell him...depends, what type of guy is he. Easy going, nervous, calm and collected, hyper etc...easy going come straight out "Hon, I have some news that I think is pretty great but I need to know what you think...tada, introduce the we're going to have a baby.
Nervous? He'll still be fine with the news however he'll probably worry about everything...
Calm...he'll take the news like he takes everything, a step at a time and fine.
In other words...no matter what personality he is...he's going to be thrilled. Give him time to digest tho, he might sit stunned for a few minutes....but I think you will get a huge hug out of the news if not being lifted and swung around ...til he realizes oops could be hurting the baby!
It will be okay...you've worried about it and now you'll find that your worries where far worse and were needless.
Best of luck and for the future
2006-06-29 15:24:40 · answer #4 · answered by dustiiart 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him....If you know he will be happy what is the problem?As far as not knowing much about pregnancy neither did any of the rest of us when we got pregnant. I started reading everything I could about what was healthy for the baby and things that I felt I needed to know about. Go to your doctor. They will give you things to read telling you all about the baby's growth and developement over the next several months. Enjoy being pregnant having children is a blessing!
2006-06-29 15:44:06 · answer #5 · answered by momofone 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey girl, I totally understand your situation. I am happy for you. But are you sure your are ready for all this? Having a baby and marriage is all a big responsiblity. Well your guy has to find out about the baby. It'll make him happier. Well, what I would suggest is, take soem time off, when he's in a good mood. Tell him how you feel about him and make sure he feels the same way about you and if he's ready for a family. If he's a loving, understanding,caring guy he will stand by you, wether your pregnant before or after the marriage. Just take it easy and talk to him in a calm and understanding way.
2006-06-29 15:20:57 · answer #6 · answered by swatid99 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well make a dinner containing Baby back ribs, baby corn, bay carrots baby things, Or do what I did to my fiance: I got a gift box on our anniversary and put a big saying world's greatest dad with a new fresh pregnancy test I took a few minutes before he came home out it in a box and wrapped a ribbon on it and handed it to him and when he opened it he was shocked and happy! He said that was the best anniversary present he had ever recieved.
2006-06-29 23:52:34 · answer #7 · answered by Smilez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with your fiance. Tell him as soon as you can, maybe over a special dinner or something. Then your next step is for you and him to decide on a doctor or midwife, whatever you want and make an appointment to be seen. Above all, be happy. Pregnancy is a wonderful thing! Congratulations!
2006-06-29 15:17:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U dont have to tell ur mom if ure not in good terms.Rather let ur fiance know about it first, then whatever guidance or information u need concerning ur pregnancy, a good doctor can give to u if u seek one.That´s my advice.Stay healthy and wish u a happy wedding and married life after.
2006-06-29 15:38:53 · answer #9 · answered by danny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congrats! Tell your fiance 1st. Then tell your friends and other family members. Tell your mom, if she wants to be a part of your life then she will. If not then move on. You can get the book "What to Expect When Expecting". It is a good book to help you out through you pregnancy. Good luck!
2006-06-29 15:19:01 · answer #10 · answered by Arkee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋