What to do if two people are in love but can not be together?

Question

Due to curcumstances - both married

Answer 1

Move on. Its just keeping false hope alive for no purpose.

Answer 2

everything is a matter of choice. you have 3 choices in any situation. 1) Accept it, 2) leave it or 3) change it.

you can accept that the situation is what it is and do nothing. you can leave the situation behind and not do anything or you can take some initiative and change it. The choice is always yours regardless of the situation.

so, these 2 people must choose which of the 3 choices they can take. obviously, they must look in the pros and cons of each choice but once that's done, pick one and stick with it no matter what. And, if you decide to not decide, you've just put off the pain until later... now is always a better time to do it than later in such a case.

Answer 3

"After awhile you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand & chaining a soul & you learn that love doesn't mean possession & company doesn't mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts & presents aren't promises & you begin to accept your defeats with your head up & your eyes ahead with the grace of an adult not the grief of a child. And you learn to build your roads today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans & futures have ways of falling down in mid-flight. After awhile you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much so you plant your own garden & decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure that you really are strong & you really do have worth & you learn & you learn..."
-- Veronica Shoffstall

Oh and by the way, use some self control. If you know it's not good, run.. run like the wind.. Only you can make yourself happy!

Answer 4

First you need to ask yourself why you want an affair? What is the need it would fill? Then you need to ask yourself if you are fulfilled and satisfied as a person? Because sometimes we focus on what's wrong with our relationship because our expectations of what I relationship can give us. We need to be a whole person who can stand on their own two feet. If you respect yourself and accept yourself you'd not want to be second best would you? Work on your self esteem visit this website: http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/confidence/learn/index.shtml
The website has lots of help in building your confidence.

Think before you act. Is this really what you want? Or do you want to be treated with more respect and care? If this is the case an affair will never bring you a quality measure of either.

Remember it always is about us. Others just mirror us, so what we are saying is I am not satisfied with myself. So what would it take for you to be satisfied/ okay with yourself? Take the steps to be happy with yourself.

YOU DESERVE MUCH BETTER THAN AN AFFAIR if only you realised this, so go and realise, go do the work on yourself and then you can attract someone worth having if you decide the person your with is not what you want.

Because if you move on to an affair you will only get another version of your current mate. Unless you change. Two unhappy people won't make each other happy.

Similarities attract not opposites in the long term. Two people with low self esteem won't make for happiness either.

Fair rides are less risky if you want to have excitement. Watching a movie that produces strong emotion is much better and less risky.

Do what you used to do to get excited.

Answer 5

Been there! Wore the T-Shirt. I loved my ex soo much and he maintained to love me more but for some reasons in his life we couldnt stay together. We tried to remain friends but it always went 2 far because of our strong feelings. Now its a case of totally no contact, deleted phone numbers and avoiding places he might be. Its alot easier 2 handle if u dont see the person at all, although i still think about wot he's up 2 and in if he's working wot shift he is. Sometimes hoping that i get a glimpse of him. Its real hard but u just hav to try and forget and move on.

Answer 6

Say you could be together, the newness, the excitement of the forbidden relationship would where off, in time, same as any other relationship, such as your marriages your in now..... Did you ever think it's possible that you think you love each other and want to be together because you can't?! And you two would probably end up the same as you are right now in your marriage's, longing for someone else.... make sense?!!!! Maybe if you put the same kind of efforts into your marriage's you wouldn't be having affair's !!!

Answer 7

You can either a) torture yourself with the hope that things will work out and continue to pine away for the person, b) force yourself to move on completely, kind of like ripping a band-aid off really quickly, c) try to draw the torture out and maintain some sort of friendship while forcing the pining and hope away, d) become celibate and move to a monastery.

I'm in the middle of doing options A and C at the moment.

Answer 8

Well, you both have 3 choices....

1. Cheat-not a very wise decision

2. Get a divorce-depends on the situation

3. Move on-if you're deeply and truly in love with each other, this would be hard to do.

Ultimately, this is something you have to decide on your own. Weigh your priorities.

Answer 9

They need to grow up.

If you're married and in love with another person, leave your wife/husband. Staying with them doesn't make things better for them. It only makes things better for you. (You get all the advantages of marriage--money, security, kids. Meanwhile, you're providing love and comfort to somebody else.)

This isn't Romeo and Juliet. Two families aren't at war, forbidding their children from being together. It's adultery. Move on. Be with "the one you love."

Answer 10

You sit down and actually make some hard decisions for a change. Think things over, over a period of time, not all at once, and then act on the conclusions you've made. *****-footing around never got anyone very far.

Answer 11

If they were really in love, then why are they still married. They should tell their spouses. It is unfair to the ones they married because they are cheating. Just let it out in the open.
Wouldn't make things more simple?