Best Friend Vs The One?

Question

I am in a relationship with a boy i get on soo well with, we laugh joke, been together 2 years living together 13 months.
Thing is, hes a nice person but not a good boyfriend, he is never there for me when i need him, doesnt take me out or ask me out with his friend and their girlfriends.. I know he is the one, but he is just a rubbish boyfriend. I couldnt be more suited with anyone than him.. but we are not working out coz of this and he knows.. he said he will try harder but heard it b4.

My best mate is a boy, i have known him for 5 years & we have always been close. He looks after me when im ill, comes to see when im upset, takes me home when im drunk and picks me up when im stranded... and hes just told me he is in love with me.
I cant stop thinking about him now, and although im in love with my boyfriend... my friend would look after me better and love me, I could see myself falling in love with him if i let myself.

do i stay with the rubbish boyfriend coz of love and fear of regretting leaving him coz he is the one... even though he isnt great boyfriend.

Or go with my best friend who will look after me, treat me right and be there what ever happens... i could see myself falling in love with but my boyfriend is the one?

Love vs Happiness

Answer 1

Oh sweetheart, you really are in a pickle aren't you?

Well firstly, ask yourself........

A/ How can your boyfriend be the one if you are having thoughts about your friend in a romantic way ?

B/ Do you really want to be with someone because they will look after ?

When you have answered these questions, you need to sit down, get a pen and 2 sheets of paper, write the names of these 2 guys on the top and fold down the middle. Now write at the top of each column FOR and AGAINST.

Write down in each column bullet point of good and bad for each of them, being totally honest with yourself. Then count them up.....

Who has got the most positive total ?

Then you ask yourself another question........

What does your gut feeling say ?

You see angel, I personally would not be with a guy who put his friends before me, you seem to be spending most of your quality time with your friend.

What I can see is that you actually have the best of both worlds, a guy you adore, and a guy that adores you ( problem is though babe, is that when your boyfriend makes you feel s**t your friend makes you feel better )......

So you don't really need to choose do you ? However this happy bubble will burst and you need to work out .... Which one of these 2 guys could you not bare the thought of being without....

And there is your answer sweetheart

Good luck angel xxxxxx

Answer 2

Dump the boyfriend and go for the best friend. Right now you're in a situation and you don't want to change out of fear... but change is scary... you're not alone, everyone feels that way sometime or another.

But you deserve to hold out for the best... and even if you didn't have the 'best friend' you still deserve better than your boyfriend is giving you. Take a step back and evaluate the relationship you have with him, I'm sure you can find enough reasons to break up with him that don't include this wonderful best friend you have. That way you don't have to feel like you're dumping one guy for another. Then take it slow with the best friend, take time to enjoy the begining of a new relationship, or take a little while to yourself first then get involved with him.

Just ask yourself this... who do you want to spend the rest of your days with? If I were you, I'd want the one who loves and takes care of me.

Answer 3

Confused.....how can you see yourself falling in love with someone else if your boyfriend is "The One"?

May be you are still with him because of routine, rather than love?

There must also be a reason why you have never gone out with your best friend. You have probably only thought of him as boyfriend material because he said that he loved you.

I think you should spend some time on your own, and go out an enjoy yourself and what will be will be

Good luck!
x

Answer 4

This is easy. B. How can ur so called boyfriend be 'the one' if he is not there for you what use is that? Should relationships not be about taking care of one another? Maybe you don't want to hurt him or perhaps you are uncomfortable with change hey it is up to you gal. Tell ur best mate to get in touch. He can look after me and I would gladly look after him. Thx you very much :)

Answer 5

if your boyfriend isnt treating you how you feel is the best then perhaps he isn't the one, if he really loved you he would treat you better there's no excuse for being a rubbish boyfriend he's not worth your love if he cant treat you better.

Answer 6

i think u should 1st of all listen to your heart! not to sound cheesy. but i think i would rather have the guy who can be a good bf not one who isnt there for me. and u said u could see yourself falling in love w/ your good friend. i would go w/ your good friend cause ya'll have been friends forever and i think it will work.

Answer 7

GO FOR NUMBER 2!!!, you need emotional support in any relationship, an num1 just doesnt know what that is, read your question again I think that you'll find your answer under your nose

Answer 8

Go with your best mate.. He's better than your best friend, the one is not a good bf. Your mate friend who looks after you is better. GO with him.(mate)

Answer 9

i comprehend the way you sense. became there a particular reason you and this lady grew to change into "former acquaintances"? youu could verify such as her & ask her why she's performing like that,per chance she likes him, clarify to her that if you're truly "former acquaintances" that you're going to take your guy acquaintances aspect.

Answer 10

YIP, it's a clear cut decision, dump your loser boyfriend & get with your best friend, you'll feel much better about it..