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I have a very close family friend which whom we spend a great deal of time with. He is 21 years old and when we first met him, had a girlfriend and a son by him and his girlfriend. They had been a couple since high school, they are both 21. Well, His race is white while hers is korean. here's where the problem sqeezes itself in, We'll call HIM michael, and HER torey. Well in some way or another things werent up at the highest point in their relationship and she decided to up and leave with their son and they both went back over to korea which is where Torey's Family lives. His son was 10 months, Michael is only 21 himself and has been with Torey like i said since high school, so he knows no other love for any other. Their son is now almost 22 months!! He has not seen either one of them and she lead him to believe that there was a chance of her and their son coming back. May not have been a big chance, but still to this day he calls her his girlfriend ( as he stutters )

2006-06-29 03:28:53 · 6 answers · asked by luvtheguys23 1 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

I truly would like to understand the way he is feeling but its not me its happening to so, At the same time it okay for him to feel that way also, naturally anyone would i believe. Okay well, Michael is not on the birth certificate and his son does not have his last name, So their in Korea and He is here and SO SO SO SO deeply misses his son and the younger days as a father that he has so far missed, That wound may never be heeled. I guess just recently Torey's parents ( from Korea ) Show up here saying that they came to get her belongings and that Torey and their son are still back in Korea. Well Torey's father works for the government there if i understand correctly, and on the news it was just saying that north korea is threatning south korea. Honestly I really dont see her parents (specially with her dad working with the gov. ) leaving her and the baby back in korea while they proceed to come here to get her things and while north and south korea are threatning.

2006-06-29 03:38:26 · update #1

I guess that ever since he hadnt been put on the birth certificate, While she was here, Any time he asked if she would go to get a paternity test so there was proof, She would always come up with some exuse, it never failed, So that is why a paternity test hadnt taken place. I have seem this man completely break down, He has unfortunetly had just one thing after another happen to him and all this wonderful man wants is to be able to be involved with his son, and to have his son grow up with him involved in his life. He wants to be able to be there for all the new things his baby does and for all the new things his son learns. Im thinking that they all might be here from korea, I just really dont see her parents letting her stay there with the baby. He is just heart broken and tired. He deserves to have the privledge of having his son around him. Is there ANY WAY whats so ever that someone could maybe suggest that could even in the slightest way point us in a direction

2006-06-29 04:35:36 · update #2

6 answers

NO! legally he is not a parent unless the parents have named him as a 'LEGAL guardian'.

2006-06-29 03:31:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

He does have rights however - 1) A paternity test would have been the first thing to prove he is the father 2) He can contact legal aid, or attorney who is familiar with custody issues. 3) If he is able to contact her, he should be calling and gathering all the information he can to help his case. In many courts, if there is no proof of paternity, it might be difficult to "force" an issue. Certainly she will want some child support. Good luck

2006-06-29 10:34:32 · answer #2 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 0 0

Most states recognize common-law relations as legal, therefore he would definetly have parental rights. In some states, if the Father was not listed in the birth certificate, the only way to prove he is the biological Father is to have a DNA test on both. He looks like a favorable candidate for Father's rights. Why did they split up, did he physically or verbably abuse her? Tell your friend that raising a family is like some basketball game. If you're going to play, then you have to be commited to your team, give 100% of yourself, and play to win. Nobody likes a loser. Maybe what she wants now is a grown man, not a young kid.

2006-06-29 10:42:40 · answer #3 · answered by the sealer 3 · 0 0

If they were unmarried then custody automatically goes to the mother. Being that she is in Korea he is going to have a long fight ahead if he really wants to see his son. He will have to get a DNA test done to establish that he is the biological father then he will have to get an attorney that will be willing to fight for him to be able to visit his son. Either way it will be expensive and may drag on for years. His best bet is to work out an agreement with the mother or try to convince her to come back.

2006-06-29 10:44:48 · answer #4 · answered by meggiek97 3 · 0 0

that is sad, and it sounds like you care alot about this"michael". the only thing i can say is,
well first is "michael" trying anything? he has to want to. he needs to go see a lawyer. dont let him say he does not have the money. bc everytown or near town has public defenders. he just has to make a effort. and alot of lawyers will see you the first time just to consult you on what is there rites. so he could get some advice free.
tell "michael" good luck and dont give up. he will regret it if he does. you cant get back the time you lose with the kids. they grow so fast.

2006-06-29 10:35:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

He should contact a family lawyer and discuss what he should do to get full custody, if he truely wants the child. They will let him know everything he needs to do and if there is a chance to get his child back.

2006-06-29 10:33:52 · answer #6 · answered by sweetsugakb24 2 · 0 0

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