Help! Cool or Parental?

Question

My daughter, who just finished 7th grade is throwing her first boy-girl party right now and my other children have informed me they are playing games such as Seven Minutes in Heaven and my daughter pleaded with me today to not inturuppt her party at all today because it would ruin her birthday. Unfortunatley, now im stuck in the middle of either an unhappy adolescent or unhappy parents of adolescents....

Answer 1

Yes, you need to go in there now, stop them from playing by giving them something constructive to do. Like a game. Take a fifth of whiskey with you, and a doobie, that ought to calm them down, and get their minds off of sex.

Answer 2

Seven Minutes In Heaven if I remember correctly is where 2 kids are locked in a closet together for seven minutes. If you really think she's going to do more than she should in those seven minutes. then stop it. After all... if she pleaded with you it's probably because she was planning on doing something you disapproved of. Which means she was bartering in bad faith.

She is only twelve. And will have many other birthdays.

The otherside.

She's only Twelve and just begining to experiment with boys. If you ruin this for her you could tramatize her to the point where she might never have healthy relationship.

In the end, it's all about how much you trust her to make the proper choices.

I'm not a father and I've not been in your situation But I know if my dad had screwed up my first boy/girl party... I wouldn't have gotten my first girlfriend. Or my second.

Answer 3

Interrupt. You can have a cool party with out anything sexual (even if it is "just kissing", if you believe THAT line!) it is unexceptable in your house, which is easier to deal with one unhappy adolescent that if she gets out of line you can cancel the party and GROUND her for her birthday or a BUNCH of unhappy parents AND a sad daughter because some of those kids probably will not be allowed to come to another party again!

Also, talk to the other parents for support!

Games like that are unacceptable in my mom's house! It is YOUR house YOUR rules. Birthday or no birthday. My grandma use to say you are never too old for a spanking and it doesn't matter what the day is!

Also think of all the GERMS that are passing! Flu, cold, diarra, MONO! IT IS POSSIBLE! H*** if one of them has an STD in their MOUTH (think, some kids are more sexually active these days) would you WANT YOUR daughter to have that>???

Answer 4

You need to be a parent and not your daughters best friend... trust me, the end results will not be good especially when she hits high school. Seven Minutes In Heaven can lead to much more than kissing and could have drastic results (I know kids who have had sex younger than 7th grade age and pregnant ones... some who got pregnant playing that game {you'd think 7 minutes wouldn't be long enough to do that!}).... Stop these games now!!! And start monitoring! The parents of these kids hold you responsible for this party and think you are watching over them!!! Your daughter may get mad at you... but she will get over it.

Answer 5

You would let that go on in your house? They are 7th graders for christ's sakes. My niece is in the 6th grade and carries Happy Bunny condoms in her purse.
It's a sick world we live in. Perhaps you should have informed their parents from the beginning that you were throwing your daughter a "make out party" (which YES that is what you are throwing) so they could just keep their children home, instead of you haveing to worry about breaking their confidence in you.
I'm sorry to be so harsh, but this is parenting.
I know what I did, and what other kids were doing when I was in the 7th grade., half of it right under the noses of VERY close by parents. Spin the Bottle is NOT spin the bottle of yesteryear anymore. When a guy breaks one of your cute little o ring bracelets off of your wrist... do you KNOW what she has to do for him? Pick a color.. and I'll tell you.
But if you have to abide by your daughter's rules.. go ahead and leave them alone for their 7 minutes in heaven, and whatever else they have planned for their evening. Just don't forget the little partyfavor trays full of assorted condoms, and flavored massage oil.

Answer 6

You are the parent. If she gets away with this in your own home with you there, what will she do when you are not there. The other kids are going to feel they can get way with stuff too. You need to interrupt, but in a casual way. Yes she might be mad at you, but it won't be forever. My kids have gotten mad at me lots of times and said I'm ruining things, but that's ok. They are now 20, 19, 15, and 7. They and their friends know how I am. We do silly things together and I'm still considered 'cool' LOL Now go INTERRUPT CAUSUALLY and say, Hey what are you doing. Find something else to play, but not that." Then when everyone is gone have a serious talk w/ your daughter. Any more quest.'s contact me.

Answer 7

I thin kyou should interrupt...just go in with a bag of popcorn or drinks ou made up special.....just make it look like you are just peeking in...what if something bad is happening or about to happen. I don't know the game but I'd check it out!! Be on the safe side...it is better to be safe than sorry!!!! You wouldn't want anything to happen and have your daughter hold that against you for not stopping it....she WILL get over you interrupting eventually...but she might not get over other things so easily.....just be cautious!!! I may overreact but my girls are very well protected like I am sure yours are!!! You are doing the right thing by inquiring though! Just go in with snacks or something so she doesn't think Mom is sabotaging her party!!! Good luck!!

Answer 8

Absolutely be the parent. That is your job. If you do not approve of those things in your home, you should go down there right now and put a stop to it. Your daughter may be mad at you now, but when she is older she will appreciate your looking out for her and making the tough choices. As an educator, I can tell you that many times children do things they are not comfortable with hoping that someone in charge will step in and stop it. Go on, you're in charge - take care of business.

Answer 9

I would definately go in there. Just kinda bring some munchies down and a game or something. Your daughter might be mad at you now, but she will get over it. Besides, if the other parents heard about that they may not want to send they're kids over to your house anymore, which would result in an even more upset daughter.

Answer 10

I'm not a parent, but I would have to say that it's probably just harmless fun. However, you should probably quietly pop your head in on the party to make sure that that's the only thing they are doing - sometimes we all have to take responsibility, regardless of whether the child is going to like it or not, because I know if I were in this situation, I wouldn't want to get a reputation for being the parent who doesn't supervise in some way, shape, or form. It's like I said, it's probably just harmless fun, but you do need to keep a "silent" eye on it. =)

Answer 11

Obviously if she told you not to go in there then she was planning on playing these dirty games. You should stop them because she will thank you later. My sister is 13 and there was a guy my age(16) with her and I beat his a$$ for it, he was too old and she was too young to be doing that stuff. You have to protect her and her friends because if her friends' parents find out about this by the kids bragging, then that would give you a bad rep. It might be bad now because she will be mad. She will get over it and thank you. Tell them to eat cake and ice cream.