For married couples with different libido levels...?

Question

Is it you or your spouse that wants more physical intimacy? And how do you handle the difference?

Answer 1

This is the most difficult thing in a marriage, if you ask me. We've been married over 15 years and over time I've gotten hornier and she's gone the opposite. We get along great but how we handle it is we have less sex and I masturbate more. It's a happy medium. We've talked about it a lot but that's our solution...I didn't say it was a great one.

Now if I hated her guts, I'd probably do something stupid and tried to have an affair or divorce her, but I still love her. What can you do?

Answer 2

I think that every couple goes through the times that one wants more sex than other one. When I got married, we both liked it at least once a day. My husband was still studying when I opened my own business, so both of us had a lot on plate. He did not like me to interrupt when he was studying, but if I wanted sex, I only had to had to put on high heels and walk by once either naked or with something very minimum on...

I like sex, but I tend to be more sensitive to what kind of responses he has to things outside of the bed. If he said something that upsetted me, I stopped talking and did not like him even to touch me. Put it is important to communicate. I remember that something very embarrashing happened to me. We had had a guarrel, I felt that he had been a real jerk. He apologised but for some reason I could not get over it. I pretended that I was fine, but when we started to make love, I started to cry...gosh, that was so embarrashing...

I think that if your relationship is healthy, you should not withold your body from your spouse. Try to make it interesting with little playful acting...I love Victoria's secret...nice stuff is a kind of treat for both of us...I like to match..I like different colors....and I am OK also with sex toys...sensual massage is also real nice, and you can buy even edible oils and lotions...Pamper each other, give each other scalp massages...

I know that every day life is not washing each others hair, and romantic walks by the river, slow dancing after dinner...but try to make it like that at least sometimes.

And when children come along, it is important to have dates withour children. Never stop romancing your spouse. It is harder to find time when you have children because if you are not just drop dead tired, somebody is banging the door or wall, or is making sounds that you cannot help but feel uncomfortable.

Talk with your spouse how you can make your sexlife better. Do not be afraid to make sounds. My daughter called me one time "Lassie" I was so embarrashed. Try to always keep your relationship friendly, and interesting...surprise each other.

But if there is sometimes periods that sex is not so important to one of you, I think that happens to everybody. Just try to not to wait too long until you make an efford to make it right. Try new posesions, new ankles...I find that right when I think I have reached all the ways I can have pleasure...there it comes, new kind of orgasm...keep expolring...God gave you this gift.

Answer 3

Due to medical problems, my level differs from my wife's.

That said, it's perfectly fine with me because we have such a great relationship that any intimacy is purely an added bonus.

Answer 4

Try to find somebody with a similar level of interest BEFORE you get married!

Answer 5

My spouce wants it all the time, sometimes she even helps herself while I'm sleeping!! seriously

Answer 6

my husband he is ready at the end of EVERYDAY . sometimes I'm not, but usually go with it... it Always is worth it.... but there are the time that I just fall asleep on him feeling guilty..

Answer 7

yes they do. people are different. try libido enhancers

Answer 8

I just take it.
But rarely do I have to.