My partner's ex has been calling my partner and he has already done it twice. He is trying to get my partner to get back together with him. What do I do in this situation? My partner was the one who told me about it, so I trust him, but sometimes, I can be a little jealous, and lately, everytime I see my partner quiet, I think that he might be thinkin about his ex. Our relationship is not that great right now, as we are stuck in a rut, but he tells me that he doesnt have feelings for his ex, and that he thinks he is a "joke", but I still wonder. What should I do?
2006-06-28 10:08:46 · 10 answers · asked by nuwontknow 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Your best bet is to let some time pass by. You can't assume you know what your partner is feeling. Other then what he is telling you. If there are more concerns regarding your partners faithfulness you should always voice them. well not always '' you don't want to be marked a jealous'' But time will tell I think in this situation. Follow your heart, be bold, and true to your self. Then everything will happen how it is supposed to.
2006-06-28 10:14:37 · answer #1 · answered by bcrawford1980 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make some fantasy, Let him enjoy your sex more, even if he already enjoys here is some tips:
2.Stop talking to him about it. It's time for action! Go to your local sex shop (if there isn't one close by, search for one on the net). You say he talks raunchy stuff to these guys? Time for some raunchy role-play. Buy a few extremely freaky items from the kinky store. Think outside of your comfort level (i.e. swings, penis rings, flavored lubricants, maybe even chaps).
3.Plan a surprise romantic night. Prepare dinner by candlelight, but this time the menu should consist of chocolates, strawberries, honey or even whipped cream. Instead of sitting at the table in your normal gear, wear some of the new sexy clothing you got from the sex shop.
4.Sit him down and ask him not to move, this is your show! Feed him the goodies. Eat the whip cream off his chest or any other creative spot. Work him into a frenzy and then move the party to the floor or even the table top (Don't worry, you can clean it later!). Take control and give him the wildest night of his life.
5.Try a little role play. It's embarrassing at first, but make up a scenario (you're his sex-crazed waiter, a kinky sex-god or another character that finds him irresistible). Ravish him and don't hold back. Whisper softly in his ear that you are his man and it's your job to fulfill his every fantasy. Be sure NOT to bring up any of the online chat guys! Just be creative.
It sounds like he's looking for a little spark in your love life. But of course he's a man and doesn't know how to communicate that. Don't blame him, blame the human genome. Unfortunately, you will have to read his mind and see what actions excite him the most.
6.If the taste fest goes well, spontaneously plan other exciting sexual events. Let him know you want to be with him and only him. Try some private outdoor action or interrupt his shower with a cleaning session of your own. In other words, keep it exciting and spontaneous. Your mission from this point on (if you choose to accept it) is to outdo and outperform any potential trick he may find on the net. If your man wants raunch, give it to him. Then, after the spark has been reunited, let him know it's your turn to check into the fantasy hotel!
Actully it was a answer to a simillar question, not exactly like you, but i think have a fantasy life and more enjoyable sex can help him to undrstand you are the sweetest candy ever he can find.
In the following URL: you can find really useful articles about gay relationships, and also you can ask the moderator by e-mail to help you.
http://gaylife.about.com
2006-06-28 19:32:57 · answer #2 · answered by Tom M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take your partner away for the weekend. Erase any memories that might be lingering of the ex. It's hard not to be jealous, but the ex is an ex for a reason. Trust that your partner is telling the truth when he says there's no feelings for the ex. Good luck.
2006-06-28 17:13:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, be honest with your partner and let him know how this makes you feel. Discuss with him how you two can improve your relationship and let him know that this is important to you. An ex is just that for a reason. Just be the best partner you can be and he will appreciate being with you. Good Luck!
2006-06-28 21:37:23 · answer #4 · answered by Splenda 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a get away trip for the weekend and spend some time together also tell your lover's ex to buzz off and that he lost his chance on a great person and it's to late to have him back. And don't be gentle be serious with his ex and establish your presence in the situation.
2006-06-28 17:49:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might need some counseling or a hobby to raise that self esteem up. No one wants to date a needy jealous guy, nor should they have to. If your bf is not giving you any reason to suspect that he is cheating on you, then you need to figure out why you think that he would cheat on you. Is it because you think you don't deserve him or think that anyone you would choose must be a loser? You need to make yourself feel good about you, and feel sure that your bf wouldn't cheat on you because you are awesome. And you need to really believe that if he did cheat on you, that it is his loss and his problem because you are super cool.
Find a therapist. Join a softball leauge. Get involved with politics. Take some music lessons. It doesn't really matter what you do, but do things that will make you happy with yourself and proud of your accomplishments.
2006-06-28 19:40:46 · answer #6 · answered by dani_kin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well its funny Cause I'm currently in the same position as your partner, i didn't tell my boyfriend he wants me back because i didn't want to hurt him , but to tell you the truth if he or she hasn't told this person to buzz off then he may possibly have feelings or be hearing things from that person that are getting to him in a good way...my ex tries to remind me of the past purposely to get in my head..And i was falling for it because me and my boyfriend were having problems too, so everything he told me was great. It took me a month but I'm slowly trying to shake him off me , i got over it but now he wont stop calling because i made it ok at first it's a hard one so becareful, another sign would be if he purposely picks fights with you, my reason for doing so was to see if he would leave me or to see if he would get so mad at me that i could blame it on him, twisted but true...... keep your eyes open
2006-06-28 17:23:19 · answer #7 · answered by jennifer m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well your partner should stop accepting the phone calls. Secondly, express to him how it makes you feel. If he's agreeable to stop accepting the phones calls you've got it made. If your partner continues to chat with his ex on the phone, remind him why they are ex-lovers. If all else fails; dump his sorry butt! Life is too short to play games with peoples hearts.
2006-06-28 18:00:22 · answer #8 · answered by Swordfish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do nothing, if it is meant to be it will. i have learned that if your lover wants to cheat there is nothing you can do about it. if your relationship is not so good right now enjoy the good time - and be glad for them. he is an ex for a reason and your lover left him. if your lover go back then he is the fool for what he calls,"a joke". i know it is easier said then done but be strong and don't let outside people no mater who it is mess up your good thing!!!
2006-06-28 17:16:02 · answer #9 · answered by mimi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm straight, but it sounds like a situation I've been in. You may have reason for suspicion. If you confront your partner, that may clear up teh question, but you may not like the consequences. Be prepared.
2006-06-28 17:14:14 · answer #10 · answered by aboukir200 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋