Why do people think the only reason to get married is just to have kids? Do people marry for love anymore?

Question

I am seeing a signicant increase in people (specifically old aquaintances, family and friends) getting married because they have to or because they want kids or because it will better their career or social life and various other reasons. I may be old fashioned but should marriage be based on the love you share with someone and the desire to share your life with them? Does anyone get married for love anymore? I feel as if my husband and I are the only young adults on the planet who still believe in love. So did this trait die out with our grandparents and other ancestors?

I am really just seeing what other people think on the subject. It has nothing to do with my personal marriage. I just get sick of hearing how young adults who get married will end up as a statisic and get a divorce just like other young married adults. My husband and I have been told many times that we are doomed in our marriage and will end in divorce before we hit our 5 year anniversary. I feel that statistics like that never take into account the reasoning for a failed marriage and the reasoning for the marriage in the first place. They generalize the divorice rate into an age group and base the number upon that.

Answer 1

people marry for stability.

Love grows but more than that stability.

Men marry for love
Women stability.

Never heard of people that marry to have children
dont need a ring for that

Answer 2

Some ladies i do know have got married on the grounds that they're Pregnant. Not a well cause. If you don't Love any individual, I could definitly now not get married to Him. Would now not final and a few ladies also are confused into it, for a few cause or a further. But, If you don't Love Him, I could certainly not get married for every other Reason. You must be in love, plenty of believe and verbal exchange is all very principal in a Marriage.

Answer 3

ACTUALLY!

As romantic as you would like marriage to be, it actually began with a more practical purpose. Most ancient societies needed a secure environment for the perpetuation of the species,a system of rules to handle the granting of property rights, and the protection of bloodlines. The institution of marriage handled these needs. For instance, ancient Hebrew law required a man to become the husband of a deceased brother's widow.

Throughout history, and even today, families arranged marriages for couples. The people involved didn't and don't have much to say about the decision. Most couples didn't marry because they were in love but for economic liaisons.

Joseph Campbell, in the Power of Myth, mentions that the Twelfth century troubadours were the first ones who thought of courtly love in the same way we do now. The whole notion of romance apparently didn't exist until medieval times, and the troubadours.

Many people hold the view that regardless of how people enter into matrimony, marriage is a bond between two people that involves responsibility and legalities, as well as commitment and challenge. That concept of marriage hasn't changed through the ages.

When romantic love and passion dies, it's the responsibility and legalities that hold many/most marriages together.

Answer 4

Because people change, thus the definition of marriage has also changed. And, you can get married for any reason, so two people doesn't have to be in love to be married. Think about arranged marriages among traditional cultures - the two poor souls are forced to marry each other and they probably can't get a divorce since their families wouldn't allow it, so in that case no divorce, but they didn't marry for love either.

Answer 5

I used to think so but with all of the quitters nowdays I wonder. Marriage has become more of a lets see if it will work and if not we will just get divorced type of institution. I still believe in the old ways that when you marry for love the two of you if committed can do anything anywhere without problem.. It does take two and that is the invincible number if two are committed to the same effort it takes enourmous power to make them stop or to queer their efforts. I cannot wait to hook with my life partner, as there will be light in the sky so brilliant scientists will form theories for years as to what it is. 100% committment, 100% unconditional love wrapped in a union with a philosophy of nobody can stop us is as more powerful than any smart weapons in the arsenal. I have three kids, boys, and they are the best. Kids last forever, marriages unfortunately do not.

Answer 6

Reasons for marrying have always varied between generations and cultures. Many people still end up in arranged marriages. I for one prefer marrying for love above all else. I think that a lot of people simply give up over time in their search for true love and settle for just being happy with someone. This isn't wrong but I don't think it is as good as finding someone and falling in love.

Answer 7

I got married because it was the logical next step, had a couple of kids then he left us. Now, I have found the love of my life, my soul mate the reason my heart beats. My love works very hard for me and my children, provides a wonderful home and supports me in every way, is more of a parent to my girls than their dad ever would have been. But we can't get married. Believe me we would love to - we would marry 100% for love, nothing else......but the law says no simply because we are both women.

Answer 8

I don't agree with that at all. Everyone has kids nowadays before marriage so that isn't a reason most people get married. It's for love but usually ends up something else.

Answer 9

I think nowadays it does seem like marriage is the IN thing to do. Marriage is supposed to be based on wanting to spend your whole life together with that one person. Divorce is so easy nowadays, people think of it as a way out instead of working on the relationship they are in. I for one think Marriage should be forever with someone you love.

Answer 10

Hi Big Bunny, I'M with you, I also believe that people don't marry for love anymore. Therefor, I understand the rise in divorce rates. Well, very simply, to answer your question, some people still do marry for love!

Answer 11

Sorry.. I did marry for love but found out it wasn't true after a very short time. Unfortunately we do have kids and I think most people marry before or right after they have kids because money of course....kids are so much more expensive than people think. Also, when kids are babies its helps to have another pair of hands, most people can't do it on their own.