MEN ONLY... Why do you cheat?

Question

I have never cheated on any man that I've been involved with. I am 29 years old and alone with three children because my exhusband cheated on me. I don't give 2nd chances. Prior to that I was involved in a long term relationship that I was certain would last. But, he too cheated. To be honest I am above average in the attractive area. (What I've been told by many. I'm not conceeded.) I keep a clean house, have a good sense of humor, cook, show respect and am not shy in the bedroom. I realize not all men cheat but, for the ones that do please give me the answer to... Why? I'd really like to understand it. Also, the cheaters in my life have told me how much they love me afterwards and beg me to take them back. I'm no fool. I know better than to except them back no matter how badly I want to. So please tell me why.

Answer 1

Most of the time they don't appreciate what they have until it is gone, they don't know what to do with a good woman, or the only head they listen to is on their dick. I haven't cheated myself but that seems to be the case in most scenarios. Don't let these guys ruin your perspective on males in general. from your description you sound like a very beautiful person and I'm sure you will find someone out their that deserves someone like you. good luck and hope you find happiness.

Answer 2

Firstly, I have to say that I am sorry you've had such negative experiences, something everyone goes through at some stage I think. Now to answer your question. Some men, not all, get bored easily and want to experience something different. You may be a top model with an angels voice, cook like a top chef and be the ultimate lover but even that's not enough to stop some men from straying. It's the thoughts of a change, someone different, different experiences that make men cheat. And if there is someone readily available it's so difficult not to take that opportunity. I'm not condoning this type of behavour at all but I hope this gives you a better insight into the why of it!

Answer 3

Look, you cannot keep reflecting t0o ur past and blaming it all the time. If looked at from ur point of view, u did everything a man wanted from his woman. But there may be somethings u overdid some which u might have forgotten to satisfy ur man. Then also, by the way u have framed ur explanation it shows that u were quite general in ur approach with every one of ur partners. u should remember that not every man has common requirements. Wht i will tell u will hurt u a little but u are at such a stage that if i dont give u facts u will probably succumb to the unthinkable. u learnt ur lesson with one man, so u shou8ld have been careful an chosing ur next partner. u cant sit around and pity urself like that. u have to go on in life. thgink about ur kids n their future. u have to live on for them. i give u my apologies and the deepest sympathy for ur loss.

A little tip: next time u do ghet into a relationship, take care of the following -
1. Do something different each time u approach ur man. U mentioned u are quite attractive, so try a new attire and and some new techniques that will totally leave ur man dazzles.

2. You cook, but what u cook is important. Your man expects ur cooking to co relate with ur mood. So if in a succession of days he finds the food uninteresting, he may jump to the conclusion that u are losing interest (that is a weak point of men, u have to cope with it).

3. Do not try to confront him too much. Give him the space he requires. Don't be very suspicious or something (not that u are, but just for the record).

Best of luck to u and ur children. Hope life has happiness in store for u ahead.

Answer 4

Men and women both cheat because something is missing from their primary relationship. Sex is not necessarily the only reason for a man or woman to stray. It may be that you are not providing the emotional support that the men in your life need. A relationship cannot be based solely on how attractive one is, or how much they put out, or whether they cook or clean... there is more to a relationship. If the emotional piece is missing, chances are the intimacy (emotional) will be found outside of the relationship.

Answer 5

Ok. You sound like a nice person; unfortunately, I think that you might be playing in the wrong league of men. Maybe you go after the guys who are as*holes. I am sure that there are many guys in your life, but you choose to ignore the ones who are genuinely nice, a.k.a., the push-overs. Next time you turn down a guy, ask yourself if you turn him down because he's not as*holish enough.

Another solution is to date outside your race, ooooh scary. Try Asian guys, Latin or whatever - interracial dating breeds unfamiliarity, and in the process, you learn alot about yourself. When you date outside your race, you are more careful about crossing that thin line and in the process you learn new things aabout yourself.

Having 3 kids can also be a problem. Personally, I would never again date a girl with kids; not if I can help it. The only kid I want to raise is my own. Therefore, you have to find a guy who can tolerate kids. The as*hole guy just pretends to like kids to shut you up. Hey, I've done it.

I am an graphic artist, so when ever an art project isn't going as plan, I tend to come up with new designs, things that I would never have tried had everything gone as plan. So in your case, you might want to try Men that you would never have tried.

If not, you can always cut off your hair, move to san francisco and become a dyke.

Answer 6

As a 'reformed' Bad boy... Because we can't help it.
We (as humans) are in a society that has us ignore the reptile portion of the brain that tells us the basics. For Men, it is Eat, F#$k, and Kill. While for Women it is: Eat, Reproduce, Nurture.
Society doesn't adhere to this thinking, and not all people are exactly like this (there are exceptions to the rules) but this is a majority of the population. That being said... There are times that we (as men) just don't have enough blood in our body to run both our brains and our crotches at the same time. If we are in the right state of mind, it doesn't matter how hot or loving you are... it comes down to that little reptile part of the brain that says 'do it' . Unfortunately we are at times too stupid to ignore that voice.
I hope this helps... but remember, we all aren't like that, and I managed to change...

Answer 7

When a man, or woman for that matter cheats, it's not always a sign of betrayal. We are all human and have daily battles with temptation throughout our lives. It's just left up to that individual to fight and win each battle, or to give in and lose...depending on his or her will. But I believe that in most cases if someone has been there for you 100% throughout your relationship, they didn't cheat because they no longer love you, or want to hurt you, they cheated because they were bested by temptation. On the other hand, if he was a dog when you met him, you wanted to get bit...LOL! But seriously, you just have to realize that being human, we've all cheated in some form or fashion. Mistakes are meant to be made and meant to be forgiven. So actually, the betrayal lies with the person that gives up on a person for making a mistake...for being human!

Answer 8

Basically, men need to be wanted in a sexual way.. Once kids arrive on the sence... everyone get's involved with the kids and we forget to pay attention to the basica sex drive of a man, which is typically driven by physical attraction... a married woman with kids that can keep the spice in the bedroom... can keep her man from wondering too far from home...

Answer 9

I was married for 18 yrs, during that time I had many chances to cheat but I never did. My ex wife on the other hand cheated three times on me. All I ever did was treat her like a Queen. It depends on the person and their mental makeup as to how they respond to outside pressures. I truly loved my wife and I believed and took my vows to heart. But then again I was raised that marriage is till death do you part.

Answer 10

It's just your luck. I've never cheated and I'd kill with a bloody axe if I found out that I was cheated on. *gigglez* But the world really isn't full of people who cheat on each other (even though I've believed otherwise at some point). I think you should applaud yourself for coming out strong.