My husband wants to go and I want him to also. Problem is geting the time off from work, I will be 9 1/2 weeks at my first appt and I didn't know if anything exciting happens at this appt or if it's just paperwork and I should just tell him to save his time off for when they do an ultra sound?
2006-06-28 08:13:25 · 27 answers · asked by shoe shoe 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
You can call the obgyn office and ask them what will be done at that appt. Just tell them why you need to know. They are usually nice about it. Then when you are with the doctor you can ask her when he should come with you to gain more from the experience and make the time off worth it. Good Luck
2006-06-28 08:18:38 · answer #1 · answered by Kota 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My guy didnt go to the first appt, He didnt miss anything either, save those missed work days for the good ultra sounds and any other emergencies. Hope you have no emergencies. The first appt is paperwork, blood test, pap smear and general doctor check up. Unless you really want him there., dont waste the day. I know its exciting the first time, but dont worry, You have a long way to go, Good Luck and Congrats!!!
2006-06-28 08:36:41 · answer #2 · answered by saraidan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband has never come to any of my prenatal exams except those where he had to drive me to another city (didn't trust the car without him) and those for ultrasounds. If your office plans to do an ultrasound at the first visit you may want to bring him, but otherwise he really doesn't need to go. My places won't do an ultrasound unless there is a reason to such as; possible multiples, high risk, unknown last menstral period, bleeding etc. If an ultrasound is done this early chances are it will be transvaginal (loads of fun) and not abdominal.
A traditional first visit includes paperwork, bloodwork, your medical history, and a pelvic exam (also breast exam.) If you really need him present for this then sure, bring him... but many men just find this uncomfortable. Also, if you don't have a ton of money this visit is definatly NOT worth the lost hours on the paycheck (which is why my hubby never went with me, now he's salary though :))
Many doctors won't even try to hear the heartbeat till after 10 weeks, many more don't expect to till after 12. They MAY try at 9.5 weeks, but don't count on it. And if they do listen but not hear the baby try not to get upset because at that stage its very hard to find a fetal heartrate with a doppler even for a skilled professional.
I suggest if the whole reason he wanted to go was to hear the heartbeat that you wait 2-3 weeks and rent a doppler to use at home. Then you can both hear it whenever you want and even record it to share with family and friends.
On the other hand I think its sweet that he wants to be there. I think even if we were rich my husband would find some way to not have to go... doctor's offices tend to make him turn a bit green in the face.
Bottom line is that while is nice of him to want to be there, the first visit is really invasive and extensive and none of it is really fun (except the fact that its "official"). If taking time off is going to be a problem I suggest arranging to have him come with you for ultrasounds and maybe the second prenatal visit when you are probably going to hear the heartbeat (and if not you may get an ultrasound!)
Like another poster said, call the office though, it may be routine for them to do an ultrasound first visit there and if so I bet neither of you wants him to miss that.
CONGRATS!!!
2006-06-28 08:33:17 · answer #3 · answered by laketahoedragoness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should not miss anything too major at this time. If getting off work is an issue save it for the later appointments when he will see and or hear something exciting. Take a video tape just in case. I had a doctor who did a sonogram right away and he videoed it for me to show my husband. Good luck!
2006-06-28 08:19:35 · answer #4 · answered by Toni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From a guys POV:
I have gone to every OBGYN appointment for my wife - pregnant or not. I felt it was my responsibility to my wife to be there for her regardless to fill out paperwork, get a pap smear or check up on the baby in the tummy. Your guy may get stared at by the other ladies in the waiting room - this is a good thing as those women who are staring are saying to themselves that they wish their guy was there with them.
I suggest that if you two cannot get off of work at the same time, you find another doctor that has office hours outside of your work schedules. My wife's doctor had late appointments on Tuesdays.
Check and see what your state offers in way of Family Leave (California calls it: FMLA). Both parents may now be eligible to take time off without risk of losing their jobs. Go see your Human Resources rep at work.
2006-06-28 08:34:14 · answer #5 · answered by Wolf 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is pretty much paperwork, pap smear, and blood tests. I would encourage him to go so he can feel a part of the process. Talk with the medical office and ask them about the doctor's schedule because sometimes you can make an evening appt or a Sat. appt.
2006-06-28 08:26:39 · answer #6 · answered by latina311204 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My fiance never missed an appt. He went to EVERY SINGLE ONE! Even at the end when they were once a week... He stayed in the room for all of the exams... He didn't want to miss anything and wanted to hear everything for himself...
2006-06-28 08:30:55 · answer #7 · answered by sh3lly2thbrush 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's difficult for him to get time off I'd wait until the appt for the ultrasound. My husband came to appts with me sporadically- whenever he could get the time off, but he made sure to get time off for the ultrasounds- that's about the coolest part for the dads.
2006-06-28 08:29:08 · answer #8 · answered by Heather 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband went with me to every single prenatal appointment. At my first one, I was given a pap smear, and then a vaginal ultrasound. We were able to see our little jellybean's heart beating, and we were only 7.5 - 8 weeks along. The doctor even gave us a picture from that first ultrasound. Let him be a part of it, not every guy wants to be so involved. Extra support is always nice. :) Good luck!!!
2006-06-28 08:25:43 · answer #9 · answered by KansasSpice 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes i would take him i took my husband to every appt. the first one thay normaly do a pap. and takeing how far along u r thay will probably do anf ultra sound to check thay baby thay did when i was 9 weeks thay use a wand thing and stick it in ur vagina to cheack on the baby cause ur not far enough along to see the baby from the belly
2006-06-28 08:21:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋