I'm 15 and I'm pregnant - what am I going to to???

Question

Oh my goodness, I posted earlier saying my period was late and I was worried about being pregnant and everyone said I had to do a pregnancy test so I went and bought one at the supermarket and it's positive...............and I'm only 15.

What am I going to do?????? PLEASE someone help me, I don't know what to do, I've only slept with my boyfriend twice and we used a condom but we must not have done it right because now I'm pregnant. I'm so scared, what am I going to do? I can't tell my mum, she'll go absolutely crazy, she won't understand at all, she'll kill me. Can I get an abortion without my mum knowing? But I don't really want to kill the baby.........oh ****, I don't know what to do but I'm so scared right now.

But isn't having an abortion a really bad thing to do? I don't want to kill a baby, but I don't think I can have it........I dont' know what to do now I'm so confused and scared........

Answer 1

abortion, definately!

Answer 2

It is still your body. Now I would never get an abortion, but if you feel you have to then its your body. But I think you should tell your boyfriend and your mother. Your boyfriend first, because he is the father. Then your mother, because she gave birth to you and knows about motherhood waaaay more than you. It may seem like she won't understand and of course at first she will not be able to accept it. But tell her you don't know how since you used a condom. Also tell her you need her help and don't know what to do. It will be a huge blow, but if she really loves you she will help.

Also if you and your father are close then tell him as well. You may want to tell them seperately, and tell either your mother or father first depending on who will take the news better. The most imprtant person to tell is your boyfriend, so make sure he is first.

This is a very sticky situation, so think about it a lot. Your choices are abortion, keeping the baby, and putting it up for adoption. If you feel like you can't go through an abortion but you can't raise a child, the best thing to do would be to find a good family and give them the child. That way you can go on in your life guilt free knowing your baby is with good people who will love him/her. The hardest part about that however is that you might not be able to see the baby once it is adopted. But if the family is willing to let you, you can visit her/him and see the baby's condition.

Abortion is not always the best answer. There are many risks to abortion: you can become infertile, and depressed. But if you feel like that is what you must do, then you can. But depending the state laws you may need parental consent.

Answer 3

Yes you're mum will go crazy, and she'll be mad and disappointed, but ultimately she's your mother and she loves you and you come first.

If you really can't tell her, then perhaps you can confide in a trusted teacher that can help you tell your mother. I don't think you can abort without parental consent, but this differs from country to country.

You have options available to you now, you can either abort the baby, and this is better for you the earlier you get it done, you could give birth to the baby and have it adopted or you and your boyfriend could face up to the responsiblity of bringing your own child into the world.

There seems little point in giving you a lecture about contraception now, but for goodness sake, you are 15 years old, you must know a little about condoms and the pill.

Tell your mother, she won't kill you, she'll yell and scream and cry, but she won't kill you, I promise.

You have to face up to this, no one on here can tell you what to do, you cannot go this alone... tell an adult, mother, teacher, auntie or grandmother... but someone.

I wish you all of the good luck and hope you make the right decision for you.

Answer 4

What makes you think abortion is a really bad thing to do?

You are not killing a baby, it is just removing some cells from your body that you don't want there anymore.

The "conception" happened a month ago, right?

The think in you is about the size of a pea, has no independant thought or functioning process, and is certainly not a baby.

Get this sorted now, or ruin your life forever.
If you are a fervant Muslim, or Catholic or some other crazy sect goer, then think twice about it, 'cause your fellow sect memebers will criticise you.

If you are not a manic religious freak, get it aborted right away, get on the pill, and carry on with your life .

All these people who tell you that you would regret an abortion don't know anything, they just watch too much television run by right wing lunatics.

Freedom of choice in a democratic world is the ONE thing that you have. DON'T let the chance pass you by

Answer 5

For future referrence, when you play with fire you will get burned. Do not get an abortion. Do you want this baby? If so, be honest with your Mom. It's not the end of the world sweetie. You can bounce back from this. If you kill that baby you will have to live with that for the rest of your life. We all make mistakes. Having a child at a young age does make it a little difficult, but if you have a good family that will stand behind you and help you then you can still succeed. Don't let this be a hurdle that you "think" you can't jump. Pray about it and let the lord guide you. Also know that the lord will not guide you towards an abortion. There are a lot of women who can not have children and would be more than happy to take in your baby. If you can't go to your Mom go to an adult that you look up to and the 2 of you go talk to your mom together.

Answer 6

If you already feel like you don't want an abortion, then don't have one just because you are worried about what other people will think.

Your Mum would have a lot more respect for you in the end if you talk to her as an adult (which is effectively what you are now, a bit early but you can manage).

This has happened so you can't pretend it hasn't happened and the person who could help you the most is probably your Mum.

If you can't face an abortion or keeping the baby, you could always consider adoption.

Your Mum won't kill you. Yes, she will be cross and disappointed but that, deep down, is only because she cares for you. Once she has calmed down she will help you, I am sure.

Good luck.

Answer 7

Look girlie, I was 15 and pregnant too. I had an abortion. It wasn't the best thing that I ever did, but it was for the best. For me. I had a friend who had her baby at 15 too, she's seven now and that was the best for her. Her father was hard to talk to. But he didn't really kill her like she thought. And my mom was upset, but she's my mom. She supported my decsion. I'm going to have a baby in a month now, I'm 22 now and don't regret a thing. It will all pass and be alright wheather you keep it or not. But you do need to tell your mom, cause your gonna need her consent to have an abortion. But you also need to tell her if your keeping it too, prenatal care is very important. Oh, and don't listen to those people saying you won't be able to have kids if you do have an abortion. That's only true in 2nd trimester abortions, which I don't agree w/. 1st trimester abortions is a safe procedure that is exactly the same as a D&C, which are done for women w/ irregular periods. I'd make a decsion soon as difficult and scary as it is. I wish you the best of luck. Everything will be ok. contact me if you want. [e-mail]

Answer 8

NEVER EVER KILL AN INNOCENT CHILD!!! okay? I dont think you're mom will kill you. A mother is always a mother and definitely she will understand. Just pray and ask guidance from God. Pretty sure He will help you :) Cheer up gurl! Its not yet the end of the world aight!? There are some people who has a bigger problem than yours.

Look, the baby hasnt done anything bad. Its not her fault and babies are blessings. She'll be your lucky charm! :) Got lots of friends same with your situation but they've manage to handle it. So, having an abortion is not a solution. Besides, it may put your life to danger as well!! Believe me...Im a nurse :) And there's a bunch of complications for the mother when a baby is aborted...

Answer 9

I had an abortion at 15 myself, so know whatever you decide you will be OK. Dont let people make you feel bad about "killing" a baby. You're not actually killing a baby. At this point that you've just missed your period you are no more than 1 month at the most if that, the "baby" is not officially a baby there isnt even a heartbeat yet no organs or anything. You have to think fast though because what it isnt now it will become day after day and the longer you wait the more different the procedure will be. Its not as scary as you may think and yes you will feel bad *human nature* but eventually you'll be back to living your 15year old life and when you're 25 ;) you'll think back on it knowing it was the right thing to do for you and your life. Dont be swayed by people's judgements because no one has to live with the course of your actions but you and no one can judge you but God and he will be the one to say if you were right or wrong dont let others speak for him. Talk with a close friend of the family you can trust, a counselor of sorts or maybe even his mom if you two are close(as was my situation). You can work on telling your mother or tell her afterward just make sure whatever you decide its best for you and your life and REMEMBER: NO ONE CAN JUDGE YOU BECAUSE IT ISNT THEIR PLACE. AND NO ONE HAS TO LIVE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS BUT YOU SO **** THE REST. My opinion of course.......I'm sure you'll make the right decision.

Answer 10

The First thing NOT to do is panic! I am 47 years old and found myself pregnant at the age of 15 in 1975..the so called age of freedom was anything but it was my first time and I had not even thought I had done it right! That pregnancey turned out to be 31 year old son called David!. You are old enough to make your own decisions but you need help from people that will not judge you and telll you what to do only you can decide.

Go to your GP and tell him you did a pregnancy test and it was possitive tell him you would like to talk about your options, there are often counselors that can help you, trained just for this sittuation. Get as much information as you can and then tell your Mum . I know that this is scarey but I think you might be suprised to find that she will want to be there for you Mine ranted and raved and told me how disappointed she was in me...then held my hand all the way through the pregnancy and at the birth, she was wonderful, give your mum the same chance! and if she isnt like that there are organisations and health proffesional that will be.
There is a saying for someone in your situation You are not the first and you won't be the last to be in this position. It isnt the end of the world as worrying as it is, as life changing as it is, its not the end ok! BE BRAVE. What about the father what does he say? maybe you can do this together..Either way I think you will be ok because you have shown you are mature already by taking the test and not ignoring it and hoping it will go away.get good advice from you GP or his Nurse and talk to your Mum. Good luck sweet heart and remember you are not on your own.

Answer 11

I know what I'm getting ready to say is something you have already heard and will hear again. Please continue to read this answer. I'm gonna say it anyways....

If you weren't ready to deal with a child you shouldn't have had sex. It's that simple! I feel really terrible for you and I'm sorry that this happened to you. I really don't mean to sound mean by what I said, but it's just a matter of fact. You had sex and i'm sure you knew how a baby is made. Both of you...I really hope that this guy isn't leaving you alone to deal with this.

You definitely are too young to be having a child...that's for sure. You really need to start by telling your mom. She may turn out to be the best person to help you deal with this. This same thing happened with my sister at 16. My mother helped her through and she was the last person I thought we could turn in such a situation. You definitely need to see a doctor, no matter what your decision is. Your doctor can help you as well.
I know that this isn't the answer that you really wanted. I'm sure your looking for a quick fix to this problem, but there isn't one. This will only make you stronger. Just remember that the decision is all yours, don't let anyone else make it for you.
Having a baby is a very difficult task, but I have 2 now and it can be done. You are very young though and it would be even harder for you if you didn't have support of some kind. It's definitely goin to be a difficult decision to make. Either way, you will be dealing with this for the rest of your life. If you have the child and keep it, if you have the child and give it up for adoption or if you have an abortion. Abortion is not a quick fix...like most people think. That too is something you have to deal with everyday of your life. To know that you killed a child. I don't think I could deal with that decision. People say it's not a baby before it's born, but that is just not true. I have 2 children and they were my babies from the minute i conceived them. There's nothing like being pregnant and it's definitely not and easy 9 months of your life, but woman keep doing it so it must not be too bad. Many children are born each day in this world.
My main thing here is to get you to think things through before you make your decision. People are quick to give you answers, but ultimately you have to deal with it for the rest of your life. It your decision...just make sure that you make the decision.