My 33 year old bf is getting a brand new Harley XL 883C. Its gonna cost us 17k when everything is all paid(bike+fin+war+etc). This includes 1k we are paying as a down payment. I co-signed on it but got to thinking, should I be doing this? This is why, he's 33 and I'm 23 we live with my parents. He's still married to his wife(she ran away from rehab + now we can't find her for a divorce and it will cost $600 to do.) We owe 1k to my parents from when I was hit by a car and I lost my job, and 2k for hospital bills from when I tired to kill myself. I just started a great job that pays well. His reason for wanting the harley is that his car that we just paid off is old and almost falling apart and he's worried that it will stop working, and that he's always wanted one. I think that we shouldn't buy the bike now but use the money to get rid of some debt and for him to get divorced and us married. I know this looks like a show from Springer but what do you think?
2006-06-28 06:45:40 · 12 answers · asked by crazy_in_lov 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
My bf would like everyone to know that after I was hit by a car, he had to support me for 6 months and that its not his fault that he wife is a drunk and that he can't find her.
Also he works full time.
2006-06-28 06:46:54 · update #1
MY bf just said that "maybe if I wasn't a crazy *****, that maybe he'd be divorced by now"
2006-06-28 06:49:44 · update #2
Yes you should... He is 33 years old and needs to start acting like one, especially if he intends on a future with you...
First step is to get rid of the debt!!! Living at your parents house is bad enough. But at least if gives you an opportunity to settle your debts.
Second step would be to find a place of your own, in addition to settling his personal issues with his wife. Remember, he is still married!!!! If he truly loved you and intended to make a future with you, that would be his priority...
Open your eyes, it seems to me he is just looking for a free ride...
He should not be spending that money on a toy!!!
Responsibilities come first!!!
I don't personally know him, but at age 33, you should not be living in anyone's parents house; especially your 23 yrs old girlfriend's. You're an adult, start acting and living like one...
Most importantly, realize he is still married and he can not commit to you until he is divorced from his wife...
2006-06-28 06:56:22 · answer #1 · answered by Milkywayman22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my lord, The Drama.....
Girlfriend, you need to be responsible with your money. The paid off car still works and gets from A to B. The bike is a dream that comes true with lots of hard work and sacrifice, not now while you're still living with your folks, Come On. You sound like you already know better. Tell the BF to grow up and live in the real world where we can't have everything we want right now, unless you're Paris Hilton. You and this guy are going to have some serious issues later on if you cannot make a good decision about this dream motorcycle now.
2006-06-28 14:05:07 · answer #2 · answered by Rudy Dawg 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh gosh - it might not be clear to you 'cause you're in the situation, but from an outsiders perspective - No, he should not be buying a bike right now!!! If I were you, I'd be completely insistant on using that money to pay off your debt first before you get a toy like a motorcycle. If your car is going to die soon, fine - buy another car that you can both use and is a little more practical. I think that buying a bike should be something you do when you're financially secure - it's not a necessity.
2006-06-28 13:49:40 · answer #3 · answered by sarahjaniepoo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like ur boyfriend thinks just because he supported you and worked for both of you he should get whatever he wants.. to be honest if someone loves you enough they will do anything for you- hence the support he gave you, but, not expect anything in return. Hes got to be realistic. Debts are nasty things and should be paid off as quickly as possible. If you've got the money then you should think about the things that matter- paying it off. If he's 33 he should be reaching the stage of his life where hes worked for a while and things are becoming more comfortable financially, so its fair enough that he wants to treat himself, and he probably deserves it, however in your situation (him going out with somebody 10 years younger than him) you have to make exceptions. Why doesnt he treat himself on a smaller bike or something less expensive? At the end of the day its tricky because hes that much older, but, it's YOUR money and you should do whatever you want with it. If he loves you he'll except your decision..
2006-06-28 14:24:32 · answer #4 · answered by radiohead_love 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
..shaking head...
Pay the bills off, pay the parents off, get your own place, get to a point that you can support yourselves.
Buy a second used car as a back up. Pay it off.
Then go buy the play toy.
Don't get pregnant as if he kills himself on the play toy you won't be alone, or make sure you have good life insurance on him.
2006-06-28 13:51:43 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he needs to drive the old car until he is having problems with it at very least....... then worry about what to do if/when the car does break down. you should not get the motorcycle just because the car COULD have problems down the road
2006-06-28 13:51:34 · answer #6 · answered by purple rain 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Run....far far away. He is showing you where his priorities are...think long and hard about where this relationship is going. Good Luck!!
2006-06-28 14:09:46 · answer #7 · answered by lissad 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow!!!!!....you're kidding right? sounds like each of you picked a real winner...good luck
2006-06-28 13:48:45 · answer #8 · answered by twentythree 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you better run from him now or else he will have you ruining your life
2006-06-28 13:50:54 · answer #9 · answered by none 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh boy!
2006-06-28 13:48:59 · answer #10 · answered by Jet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋