I'm married for 11 yrs, and wanted to get in contact with a girl that I was really good friends with, and had a big crush on. We were only friends, and never dated.
2006-06-28 05:10:18 · 16 answers · asked by wonderdude 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
no, but I don't think it's a great idea
2006-06-28 05:14:33 · answer #1 · answered by Christy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think its weird. I do however think that the person you should ask that question to is your wife. I personally can totally understand the level of curiosity one has about old flames and friends. I spend a good bit of my time looking for old highschool friends, and I'm married and have to kids. It really depends on your intent once you find the person, and whether or not your wife will be okay with it. I'd keep her informed. Rather than have her find out on her own and assume you were looking for a hook-up/affair.
2006-06-28 05:15:30 · answer #2 · answered by chaoscausingleo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your married, and reaching out for an old flame/desire/female friend, it is time to look at yourself (and whats going on in your mind).
It is when we are usually lacking something, or disliking something in our current personal relationships or lives that we tend to look for things that made us feel good in the past. Maybe, this old crush made you feel a certain way? Or the situation made you feel a certain way?
So, the question is: What is missing? Or, what is wrong?
I bet if you thought long and hard about it, you would find out what it is...
When you do, focus your attention on fixing the current situation. There's no need to go back in your past.
2006-06-28 05:18:20 · answer #3 · answered by AJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not bad but make sure your wife knows that. Make her feel more precious and more important than your previous crush. If you think there might be a little bit of feelings left for your "old flame" ...maybe you should take your wife along to keep you in line. Lol but thats only if you have good morals.
2006-06-28 05:15:32 · answer #4 · answered by So and so 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should examine what is missing in your life presently that you think contacting an old flame will rekindle. And or better yet,I think you need to rekindle the romantic spark in your marriage that made you first fall in love with your wife. You can never go back to that "splendor in the grass moment" with an old flame really anyway.
2006-06-28 05:16:07 · answer #5 · answered by KrisDee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope, it's not wierd. Not sure what your motives are - but maybe your wife isn't your best friend anymore? And you're looking for that friendship again. I have been married for 9 years and really want to find an old best friend from high school but have been unable to. We dated for a summer but were mainly just really good friends and I miss him still. My husband is my best friend but I still miss my old best friend.
2006-06-28 05:15:07 · answer #6 · answered by Ms. Candi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not weird, it is just dangerous. It may lead to something more than friends. Also, she may be married or in a relationship and trying to contact her might jeopardize that. Plus, she may not want to be in contact with you - sometimes the truth hurts!
2006-06-28 05:18:28 · answer #7 · answered by Leenie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to research your marriage..is something wrong?why do you have time to think about an old GIRL"friend" when you have a wife and maybe a family..something maybe missing..
i say this because i have been married for more than twice as long as u,not so happily, and i think of old boy "friends' ..see whats wrong with your marrige fix it or get out before your whole live is gone...
2006-06-28 05:20:12 · answer #8 · answered by lindaann_56 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, it's weird.
run it by your wife first if she thinks it's a great idea then go for it
but really, it's weird....sounds like you are looking for a little adventure
and if you never dated why is she called an "old flame"?
2006-06-28 05:15:18 · answer #9 · answered by Alauria B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, not at all an issue with weirdness here. If you cared about her, you are probably curious to know how she has faired in her life, and would like to know if she is well...just, take your wife with you when you meet her.
2006-06-28 05:14:45 · answer #10 · answered by Fun and Games 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's weird. You need to have a crush on your wife. You need to be friends with your wife.
2006-06-28 05:14:34 · answer #11 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋