Shld you tell your bf you are pregnant even when you are 100% sure the end result is still abortion?

Answer 1

The trouble with abortion, whether a person agrees with it or disagrees with it morally, is that the after effects on us as women far outlives the 18 years or so of difficulty (and personal growth) of raising the child would have.

In this day and age when abortion is such a hotly contested political topic, it is difficult to get knowledgeable people on either side of the debate to actually be real and talk about the real life pros and cons. Everyone wants to shout their position, and in the end, neither side really ends up representing either the unborn child, the mother, or women in general.

You see, whether you agree that abortion should be legal or not, we as women are physically, biochemically, emotionally and spiritually built to pass on all that is good inside us to our children and to overcome all that is less than good about us for our children.

Our society basically hates women, to the point that other women have lost track of the fact that abortion is really nothing more than the ultimate symbol of women and our natural values being less important than men.

If men had babies, they would not lose their jobs for being pregnant. Men would not need to drop out of school. Men would not be pressured by our society to dispose of that one primary thing that makes women ultimately MORE than men. No man can bring a life into the world. No matter how good a father is, he will never be the one that gave his child life. No matter what sacrifice a man makes for his children, it will never be greater than the sacrifice made by that child's mother. It is for this reason that men can never be equal to women. It is the difficulties, the trials, the hardships, the inconveniences of life that build our character, our strength, our ability. And when this man's world dictates to us that we must destroy that one thing which gives women all of these higher values, women are profoundly degraded.

There are so many things in life more fun than raising babies. There are so many things in life easier than pouring your life into someone else's for years on end. There is very good reason for abortion, but those reasons do not outweigh the personal benefits we gain by giving life to our children.

You are a mommy today. From this point forward, you will ALWAYS be a mommy. This life has been made. If we are to argue that it is only cells and has no soul, fair enough. But those cells are not destined to grow into a moose; they are destined to become the best part and the best testimony of you yourself.

That baby already has your eyes, your nose, or some part of you that will be carried on for generations to come, as long as this part of your body is allowed to let itself be heard.

Having a baby is scarey, especially when you had other plans, or worse yet, when you weren't really ready to make plans at all. But having a baby is the one opportunity a woman has to be her own self, to not be ruled by rules and standards set by men, but to stand up and say, "This is part of me."

I have not heard one single story told by a woman who was joyous and proud of her abortion. On the other hand, I have never met a mother who was not joyous and proud of her child. Abortion robs women of their joy, of their special place in society. When you find that you're pregnant, you just stopped being a girl. At that very moment, no one can ever again argue that you are not a woman and a mother. Once that baby girl is gone, she will leave a hole inside your belly where she would have grown and a hole inside your heart where all the things that you had just for her wilt and die, never to be part of you again.

You have choice, and you do not have to choose life, but understand, that by choosing the death of the little girl inside you, you are also killing the beautiful, mature, simply magical mother you would have been.

I wonder if the things that are going on in your life today are really so much more important than the proud and joyous mother you could be 20 years from now.

As for your boyfriend, she is his daughter too. Obviously he cannot veto your decision, it's your body. But understand, that if he wants you to have an abortion, it is because he sees you as someone he does not wish to be tied to forever. And if he does not wish you to have an abortion, it is because he sees you as a person who has the deep spiritual qualities that he wants the mother of his child to have.

If you choose abortion, you may well have good reasons, but those reasons, those circumstances, they will be different next year or the year after. But you will always remain the girl who didn't see enough value and strength in herself to be worth passing on. Some would call you a murderer for that, but I am a woman and I have known your difficulty, and so I will just say that having aborted this child, you will be introduced to an emptiness and a guilt and a loss that will change everything you could have been into something darker and less lovely than you are today as the mommy of a brand new baby girl in your tummy.

Do not be afraid. If you bring this child into the world, you will be an excellent mother and your life will not be inconvenient, it will be full of joy, of pleasure, of excitement, and you will have a purpose, a mission, an identity greater than yourself.

Love,

Your friend Rebecca

You can write me at: [e-mail]

Answer 2

This question is a confusing one- however I think I have the answer. If you are pregnant and you are not planning on keeping the baby, then no don't tell him. If you have already made this decision, don't further complicant it by telling you bf that you are pregnant and then abort the baby. If you tell him and he disagrees with you having an abortion, is it possible that you might change you mind and keep the baby? If the answer to my question is yes, then tell him, if the answer is "no, I am going to have an abortion whether he wants to or not" then do not tell him.

Answer 3

If you are sure he's the father yes, but refrain from doing so if he isn't. It used to be your life, but remember you now have another life growing within you. Don't let him push you into doing something you don't want. And if that is what you want, please don't. You are responsible for his/her life too. No matter what everyone tells you, it is murder. If people tell you it's not alive, it will be. Think about it. Nothing is more important in this world than new life, don't ever think otherwise. Do you really want to kill your baby or let someone else make the decision for you? You will regret it someday. Have you talked to your parents? Can you take care of him/her by yourself. Even adoption is better than death. Think on it. Please. Someone gave you the gift of life. Don't deny it to your baby-no matter what the cost.

Answer 4

I f you are having an abortion that he doesn't want you to have, then don't tell him. He doesn't need to feel guilty. Break up with him, if you have different life philosophies, you shouldn't be together.
If you are even remotely willing to carry the baby to term, then you should tell him.
If you're worried about carrying it to term and him trying to get the baby because he is abusive...then don't put him on the birth certificate

Answer 5

Yes

Answer 6

Your boyfriend has a right to know that he has a child (even if that child is currently small and hidden). Please make sure you have ALL the facts before you do something you might regret the rest of your life. Keep in mind that people who are in the business of selling abortions are not going to give you the most unbiased information.

Information on all aspects of abortion:
http://Abort73.com

A four-minute, must-see video on abortion:
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-4-video.html

Photos of abortions:
http://www.cbrinfo.org/Resources/pictures.html

Abortion stories:
http://abortiontv.com/Words/truestoriesfrom-mothers.htm

Photos and facts about prenatal development:
http://www.justthefacts.org/clar.asp
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-2-prenatal.html
http://www.studentsforlife.uct.ac.za/foetal%20dev%20photos.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_pictures/3847319.stm

Abortion risks:
http://www.abortionfacts.com/reardon/effect_of_abortion.asp
http://www.standupgirl.com/site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=218&Itemid=40

Abortion deaths:
http://www.lifedynamics.com/Pro-life_Group/Pro-choice_Women
http://www.afterabortion.info/news/abortiondeaths.html
http://www.lifeissues.org/ru486/deaths.htm

Free, confidential help at a pregnancy center near you (referrals for financial, medical, legal, and housing assistance; free pregnancy tests and ultrasounds; free maternity and baby supplies; pregnancy, parenting, and adoption information; counseling and emotional support):
http://www.optionline.org/advantage.asp

Support for pregnant teens:
http://standupgirl.com/site/index.php

Support for pregnant college and career women:
http://www.nurturingnetwork.org

Answer 7

I think communication is very important in an healthy relationship. I say this because I just went through the same exact thing and it is far better to let the father know and get his opinion then to live with what-ifs or regrets and him hating you for not telling him later.

Answer 8

YES 100%. Every father deserves to at least know. Besides, why should you feel all the guilt later by yourself? Oh...I'm not putting you down. Just been there and know others who have. It stays with you the rest of your life. He should be able to share in that bad feeling too.

Answer 9

Yes he should know! The man may not believe in murder like you do. At least give the baby a chance in this world. It didnt ask to be put inside of you and then killed for no reason. Give he or she to a good home.

Answer 10

He has the right to know, if it is his baby. Maybe you guys can sit and talk about it. Maybe the end result won't be abortion. Think about it!

Answer 11

Yes. Absolutely. What if he really wanted the child. Maybe it might change your mind. That is a life afterall. and he has the right to know. But if he agrees with you then you can feel more confident in your decesion.